Enter A Bar Jokes
122 enter a bar jokes and hilarious enter a bar puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about enter a bar that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Enter A Bar Short Jokes
Short enter a bar jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The enter a bar humour may include short enters a bar jokes also.
- Bill Cosby enters in a bar ... ... i don't know what happens next because I suddenly woke up in a motel's room.
- A lion, a witch, and a wardrobe enter a bar; the bartender eyes them quizzically and asks, "what're you up to with all that?" The lion responds gruffly, "Narnia business!"
... I'm sorry. - The blonde, the policeman, the jew, and the chicken from the other side of the road enter a bar. The bartender stares at them for a few seconds, then asks: "Is this a joke?"
- 20 blondes are standing outside a bar. On the other side of the street another blond is walking by; "Hey, come over here. You have to be 21 to enter"
- Two men enter a bar in the Russia. One says, "Why does Putin only write in lowercase?" The other one says, "Because he is afraid of capitalism."
- An infectious disease enters a bar... The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind in here." It replies, "Well, your not a very good host."
It isn't mine, my doctor told me this one - A man enters a bar only for Asians... The bouncer asks "What kind of Asian are you?"
The man answers "I am Caucasian" - A Belgian guy enters in a bar... He asks for a diet coke and the barman says : I don't have them anymore, can I give you ONE ZERO ?!
\#WorldcupJokes - A bottle of beer enters a law-abiding bar during the prohibition era. The bartender says: "We don't serve your kind here."
- Why were the communists barred from entering the fine dining restaurant? It's because they had no class
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Enter A Bar One Liners
Which enter a bar one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with enter a bar? I can suggest the ones about a woman walks into a bar and two guys walk into a bar.
- Happy Halloween... Why did the ghost enter the bar... For the BOOOOS
- A politician, a liar and a crooked man enter in a bar. He sits down and drinks coffee.
- Why did 20 Blondies wait outside the bar? They had to be 21 to enter
- An Arab enters a bar.. Along with 500 passengers and an entire jet
- After entering a limbo competition, Paul walks into a bar He lost
- What did the toothless termite said when he entered a bar ? Is bar-tender in here ....😂
- Two lions, two tigers and a jaguar enters a bar. The bartender says: Herzlich willkommen.
- When Perry Mason entered the bar he was only practicing
- When chocolate entered the bar the nuts all hung around
- A man enters a bar.. and then he drinks some water.
- A roman statue enters a bar He says "Where's the Fiji Water?"
- A fractal enters to a bar and says: "A fractal enters to a bar and says: ..."
- What does an Irishman say when he enters the bar? Top o' the mornin' to ya!
- A comedian enters a bar. He orders a grin.
- Loose and tight entered a bar One came out too fast and the other couldn't fit in
Enter A Bar Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about enter a bar you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean a horse walks into a bar jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make enter a bar pranks.
What did one blonde say to the other blone, while entering a bar?
Well blondie, Bottoms-Up.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An alcoholic, a s**... and a gay went to a doctor.
The doctor told them that if they do again what they think are addicted to, they will die.
As soon as the alcoholic went out of the hospital, he saw a bar.
He thought for a while and said to himself, "If I drink one, I will die, if I don’t drink, I will die, too. So it’s better to get drunk."
And he entered the bar, drank and died.
At that time, the s**... saw one cigarette-end on the street.
The gay walking behind him started crying, "Don’t! Don’t do it!"
"Why? I want to smoke so much."
"If you bend... we both are dead!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A fellow decides to take off early from work and go drinking.
He stays until the bar closes at 2am, at which time he is extremely drunk.
When he enters his house, he doesn't want to wake anyone, so he takes off his shoes and starts tip-toeing up the stairs.
Half-way up the stairs, he falls over backwards and lands flat on his rear end.
That wouldn't have been so bad, except that he had couple of empty pint bottles in his back pockets, and they broke, and the broken glass carved up his buttocks terribly.
But,he was so drunk that he didn't know he was hurt.
A few minutes later, as he was u**..., he noticed blood,so he checked himself out in the mirror, and, sure enough, his behind was cut up something terrible.
Well, he repaired the damage as best he could under the circumstances, and he went to bed.
The next morning, his head was hurting, and his rear was hurting, and he was hunkering under the covers trying to think up some good story, when his wife came into the bedroom.
"Well, you really tied one on last night," she said.
"Where'd you go?"
"I worked late," he said, "and I stopped off for a couple of beers."
"A couple of beers? That's a laugh," she replied, "You got plastered last night. Where the heck did you go?"
"What makes you so sure I got drunk last night,anyway?"
"Well," she replied, "my first big clue was when I got up this morning and found a bunch of band-aids stuck to the mirror."
A guy was going to Texas and when he went on the train he said, "Ohh my god Texas chairs are really big."
He went to a bar he asked for a bear and when the bar tender gave him the mug of bear the guy said, "Wooww Texas mugs are really big."
Later he asked the bar tender were is the bathroom and the bar tender said, "Strait on your right."
But the guy went on his left and when he entered the room he slipped and feel in the swimming pool and said, "Don't flush don't flush!"
A beautiful woman enters a bar and sits next to a lawyer.
"Listen honey," she says, "For $50, I’ll do absolutely anything you want."
The lawyer looks around, pulls fifty dollars from his wallet and says, "Paint my house."
No Strings Allowed
Three strings were walking down the street looking for a good time. They come upon a bar and figure they'd go in for a drink. The first one stops & points out a sign to the others "No Strings Allowed". Well, the first one, not wanting to be discriminated against says "Screw this, I'm going in." As he enters the bar, the bartender shouts "HEY STRING, get out! no strings allowed in here," as he pulls out some scissors. The string slowly backs out of the bar and tells his friends. The 2nd string says, "i'm not putting up with that!" and goes in. Again, the bartender yells, this time coming out from behind the bar with his scissors "Hey! No strings allowed in here!" Seeing the large bartender coming towards him, the 2nd string turns and goes back outside. The 3rd string says, "well, i don't care, i'm getting a drink". But before he enters, the 3rd string musses his ends and ties himself up in the middle. He enters the bar and the bartender shouts again "Hey, No Strings Allowed." The 3rd string calmly says, "I'm no string". The bartender pauses and says, "you're not a string?" and was somewhat confused. The 3rd string replies, "Nope, I'm a frayed knot."
A man approached me on the train...
...and said "Remember Leonardo DiCaprio," and then ran away.
Later when I was grocery shopping, the same man came over to me and said "Remember Leonardo DiCaprio," and then ran away.
Then at night, when I was at a bar, the man came, said "Remember Leonardo diCaprio," and ran away.
When I had gone to bed and was trying to fall asleep, he entered my room, said "Remember Leonardo DiCaprio," and ran away.
At that point I had gotten tired of him so I called the police. They asked if I could tell them anything about him. "I do not know his name," I told them, "but he reminds me of Leonardo DiCaprio."
Once a DOCTOR and an ENGINEER entered a chocolate store
Once a DOCTOR and an ENGINEER entered a chocolate store...
As they were busy looking around,
doctor stole 3 chocolate bars...
As they left the store, doctor said to Engineer :
"Man! I'm the best thief ever,
I stole 3 chocolates and no one saw me. You can't beat that"
Engineer replied: "You wanna see something better? Let's go back to the shop and I'll show you real stealing"
So they went to the counter and Engineer said to the Shop boy:
"Do you wanna see magic..?"
The Shop boy replied: "Yes..!!!"
Engineer said: "Give me one chocolate bar!"
The shop boy gave him one, and he ate it...
He asked for the second, and he ate that as well..
He asked for the third, and finished that one too...
The shop boy asked: "But where's the magic..?"
Engineer replied: "Check in my friend's pocket, and you'll find them..!!!"
Two Photons enter a bar.
Two Photons Finish their shift at their job, hop a cab and head to a bar.
They enter the bar and the bartender asks "Are you coming or leaving?" One of the photons replies "Isn't it obvious?"
The bartender replies "No, I'm colorblind.
An elderly man and woman enter the bar and ask the bartender for their usual drinks.
The bartender serves them, speaking to the man, "Mr. Johnson, it's been awhile since we saw you last, how are you and your wife doing? We were worried about you, the last time you came in you didn't seem to recognize or remember anyone."
The elderly gentleman responds, "Well, you know how it is when you start getting up in years… but I've been seeing a fantastic memory therapist. She's taught me some mental exercises that have helped me to remember all the important things in life."
The bartender says, "That's great! What's the therapist's name?"
The elderly gentleman looks confused before snapping his fingers, "What's that flower? The red one with thorns on its stem?"
The bartender answers, "A rose?"
"Yes, that's it," the older man smiles before turning to his wife, "Rose, what's the name of that therapist I've been seeing?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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A black, a Jew, and a gay enter a bar..
.. made you look
A Jew, a mathematician and an Irishman enter a bar
Bartender says: "How did you all land up in the wrong joke?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A priest is in the confessional box...
A priest is in the confessional box and he has to go to the restroom, so he grabs an alter boy and says, "Take over for me for a couple minutes."
A man enters the box. "Bless me father for I have sinned..."
The boy says, "The priest will be back in a few minutes."
The man replies,"I'm in a bit of a hurry. Do you know what Father Daniels usually gives for o**... s**...?"
The boy says, "Well, he usually gives me a candy bar and a five bucks."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Safe Death
A man was having serious medical problems and had an appointment to see his doctor. He was so distraught over the likely possibility of bad news that he asked his son to go along with him.
Sure enough, the doctor announced that the man had terminal cancer and had only a short time to live. Needless to say, he was devastated. Finally the son consoled him enough to leave the office and they decided to go to the local tavern and bury their sorrows in alcohol.
When they entered the bar, all the man's friends were there. They saw how bad he looked and one pal commented, "It looks like you just saw the grim reaper!" The man replied, "Yeah, I just saw my doctor and I've got AIDS."
Astonished, the son pulled his dad over to the side and said, "Dad, I was with you at the doctor's office and he said that you have terminal cancer, not AIDS." To which the man replied, "I know that, but I don't want any of those b**... f*cking your mother after I'm dead!!!!!!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I enjoyed your vampire joke and remembered this one, check it out.
There was this bar for vampires only. It was crowded with famous and rich vampires like Dracula, Nosferatu, Edward, Selene, Victor...
Dracula himself was enjoying a cup of 18 y/o O negative, delicious.
And this skinny looking vampire enters the bar and asks for a cup of hot water. No blood. The bartender is a bit skeptical - "what are you doing with a cup of hot water?!"
"just found a used t**..., gonna make myself some tea"
A talking horse enters a bar…
…and demands to the barman to serve him a cold beer. The barman, astonished at the sight of a talking horse tells him to wait for a minute while he checks with the bar's owner:
–There's a talking horse in the bar, and he's asking for a cold beer! What should I do?!
–Well, serve him –answers the owner– just charge him double the usual fee, he won't notice.
So back he goes, purs the cold beer and handles it to the horse. While the horse is still drinking it, the bartender tells him:
–Well… we're not really used to see talking horses around here
To which the horse reply:
–With this prices, it doesn't surprise me!
*Please note: not an English native speaker*
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A piece of string walks into a bar...
The bartender says, "We don't serve no scrawny pieces of string in here."
The piece of string leaves, goes around back, ties himself up, ruffles his hair and re-enters the bar.
The bartender says, "Say aren't you that sorry piece of string that I told to beat it?"
The string replies, "frayed knot."
"Can i have a cup of coffee please?"
A man enters a bar and the bartender comes over and asks Can I help you sir?". The man answers "What does a cup of coffee cost in this place?". The bartender sais "That would be $2.60". "Alright, i'll have one." sais the client and he takes 26 dimes out of his wallet and he throws them on the ground.
The bartender doesn't want to get involved in a fight so he just picks up the money and he brings the man his coffee.
A week later, the same man enters the bar. He orders a coffee again but this time he pays with a five dollar bill. The bartender smelled an opportunity for revenge and when he brings the coffee, he throws 48 nickels on the ground as change. The client throws 2 extra dimes on the floor and orders a second coffee.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A guy enters bar carrying an alligator
A guy enters bar carrying an alligator. Says to the patrons, Heres a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my g**... inside. The gator will close his mouth for one minute, then open it, and I'll remove my unit unscathed. If it works, everyone buys me drinks. The crowd agrees. The guy drops his pants and puts his privates in the gator's mouth. Gator closes mouth. After a minute, the guy grabs a beer bottle and bangs the gator on the top of its head. The gator opens wide, and he removes his g**... unscathed. Everyone buys him drinks. Then he says: I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try. After a while, a hand goes up in the back of the bar. It's a woman. I'll give it a try, she says, but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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Having a t**... with a mom and daughter
So it was Saturday night and I had no date and decided to drop in at the bar to get drunk and hopefully a girl to get laid with. As I started downing a few shots I noticed this hot looking mature lady ( must be in her 50s) sitting all alone at a corner table getting drunk and this thought came to mind that if she looks so hot for her age then she must be having a hot looking daughter as well and wish I could have a t**... with them. So I went to her table and asked her if I could join and to my delight she said yes. I chatted her up and next thing I know we caught a taxi and proceeded to her home. In the taxi I told her about my fantasy of having a t**... with a mother daughter combo and to my delight she felt it was a great idea and so we reached her home and as we entered she let out a shout,"Mom you still awake?"
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
c**... biology bar joke
A few cells enter a bar. They sit in a corner and talk amongst themselves, drink moderately and don't pick up a fight with anyone. They leave the bar quietly.
Because they were cultured cells..
A drunk guy walks out of a bar
There's a cop outside who asks him, "What's your name, son?"
The drunk guys answers, "I'm Jesus Christ!"
Cop says, "You are not Jesus Christ. What's your name?"
Drunk guy replies, "I'll prove it. Follow me." The cop follows him back into the bar.
As they enter, the bartender yells, "Jesus Christ! Are you back again?!"
Drunk guys turns to cop and says, "See?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A middle-aged man enters a bar, and orders a straight double whiskey.
The bartender asks:
"What's the occasion ?"
"I just had my first ever o**... s**......" goes the guy.
"Well, this calls for a celebration", says the bartender, and takes out a full bottle, "this is on me".
"Thanks", answers the man, "if this doesn't clear up the taste, nothing will".
A man walks into a bar with his dog . . .
. . . and the bartender says "You can't bring a dog in here!"
The man says "It's my seeing eye dog". The bartender apologizes profusely and gives the man his drink on the house.
A second man enters the bar with his dog and the first man calls to him: "Pssst, buddy. You can't bring a dog in here unless you say it's your seeing eye dog". The second man thanks him for the tip, goes to the bar and orders a drink.
The bartender says "You can't bring a dog in here!"
The man says "It's my seeing eye dog".
The bartender says "I don't think so, they don't give out Chihuahuas as seeing eye dogs".
The man says "WHAT?! They gave me a Chihuahua?"
A man orders a coffee
A man enters a bar and the bartender comes over and asks "Can I help you sir?".
The man answers "What does a cup of coffee cost in this place?".
The bartender says "That would be $2.60".
"Alright, I'll have one." says the client and he takes 26 dimes out of his wallet and he throws them on the ground.
The bartender doesn't want to get involved in a fight so he just picks up the money and he brings the man his coffee.
A week later, the same man enters the bar. He orders a coffee again but this time he pays with a five dollar bill.
The bartender smelled an opportunity for revenge and when he brings the coffee, he throws 48 nickels on the ground as change. The client throws 2 extra dimes on the floor and orders a second coffee.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So a c**..., a clown and a crook walk into a bar...
...no wait, they enter a presidential race.
A botfly larva enters a bar..
.. and says "I'll have a shot of whisky and a lump of rotten meat please".
"Are you sure you want rotten meat?"
"Want it? I encyst on it!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Scotsman, an Irishman, and a Welshman enter a bar...
After a lot of fighting and harsh words 3 English-men walk out.
A man enters a bar with a revolver
He climb up a table, looked around and yell.
"WHICH ONE OF YOU SLEPT WITH MY WIFE?!"
The bar went silent for a minute when suddenly a man at the back says.
"you are gonna need more than 6 shots pal!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So, a happy Muslim on an empty stomach enters a gay bar.............
Bartender asks, "What will it be!?"
The Muslim replies, "Shots for everyone!"
A guy goes into the confessional box after years being away from the Church.
He pulls aside the curtain, enters and sits himself down.
There's a fully equipped bar with crystal glasses, the best vestry wine, Guinness on tap, cigars and liqueur chocolates nearby, and on the wall a fine photographic display of various women who appear to have misplaced their garments.
He hears a priest come in. Father, forgive me for it's been a very long time since I've been to confession and I must admit that the confessional box is much more inviting than it used to be.
The priest replies, Get out, you idiot. You're on my side!
A pair of virtual particles pop into existence and enter a bar.
The entrance bell however, does not go off.
A priest, a doctor and an engineer walk into a bar..
.. The bartender glances at them as they enter the door and starts pouring drinks. Before they reach the counter their preferred drinks are ready for them. The engineer asks the bartender "How did you know what drinks we wanted?". The bartender mumbles "Repost from yesterday"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Alien arrives on Earth
and goes to communicate with humans.
He enters a bar, men there are drinking v**....
"I am from Sirius" alien starts.
"Hey, barkeep! Pour Sirius a shot"
Everyone drinks a shot, after a while alien starts again:
"You didn't understand me. I am from Sirius"
"Hey, bartender! Pour Sirius another one"
After the second shot already slightly drunk alien starts again:
"Didn't you understand? I am an alien"
Men looks between them and yells to the bartender:
"Sirius had enough. He is drunk already"
A lemming enters a bar...
The bartender looks at him, sighs, gets out all of his glasses, and starts pouring.
An Old Man is thrown out of a bar
A young man who was walking down the street says "Hey Old-Timer, what happened in there". The old man looks at him and says "Well son, I am Jesus Christ". "Jesus Christ?", the young man replied skeptically. "Yes my son, follow me", the old man said as he walked into the bar.
As he enters, the bartender turns around and says "Jesus Christ! not you again!"
An Irishman, Englishman and a Scotsman enter a brand new bar.
The Englishman and Scotsman loved it, the Irishman was blown away.
What happened to the peanuts that entered the bar?
They were a salted.
Once a tap and a sink went to a bar.
The tap went in but the sink wasn't allowed to enter.
He said to the bouncer today is the oldest you've ever been and the youngest you'll ever be again. Let that sink in.
A pun and a hyperbole walk into a bar.
As they enter, the hyperbole is frightened by a shifty looking non sequitur pacing outside the door. The pun just chuckles lightly and reassures the hyperbole (it can be a bit dramatic sometimes). They take their seats at the bar, and the hyperbole finally relaxes. For a moment it had seemed certain that the sketchy non sequitur was entering right behind them, but thankfully, it does not follow.
Secret agent, spy, and a man in a trenchcoat enter a bar...
... barman says: "I've got a special message for the 3 of you. Everyone else leave!"
Secret agent and spy leave the bar.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A One-Armed Bear Walks Into a Saloon..
When he enters, the piano player stops playing, the poker players put down their cards, and the room goes silent. The bear stands in the doorway a few seconds, surveying the saloon, before walking to the bar. Whiskey, he says. The bartender slides a shot glass of rotgut down the bar, which the bear snags with his good arm and gulps down. Another, he says. The bear downs the second whiskey, swivels slowly on his barstool to face the room, and announces, ** I'm lookin' fer the man that shot my paw. **
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Once Upon a Time in the West, a Bear Walked into a Saloon..
As he enters, the piano stops playing, the poker players put down their cards, and the room goes silent, except for the ticking of the Grandfather clock in the corner. The bear stands in the doorway a few seconds, surveying the saloon, before walking to the bar. Whiskey, he growls. The bartender slides a shot glass of rotgut down the bar, which the bear snags with his good arm and gulps down. Another, he says. He downs the second whiskey, belches, swivels slowly on his barstool to face the room, and announces, ** Ah'm lookin' fer the man that shot muh paw. **
When becue entered the bar
It turned into Barbecue
A guy enters in a bar...
A angry guy enters in a bar with an assault rifle in his hands. When they saw him, every customers went silent in fear. The angry guy screamed : " where is the guy that slept with me wife?!? " Every customer stared at each other, then started laughing. "What's so funny?", asked the one holding the gun. A customer at the back of the back then yelled : "No chances you have enough ammo in there! "
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Got something to celebrate?
A guy enters a bar and orders 6 bacardi coke's. Bartender asks if he has something to celebrate. ''Yes!'' says the guy, ''I had o**... s**... for the first time!''
Bartender: ''Nice, congrats! The 7th is on the house then!''
The guy: ''No thanks, if the taste sticks after 6 drinks, it wil after 7 as well ...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I walked into a bar full of ugly women last night and swore I entered the matrix.
Because all I was seeing were 1s and 0s
Thanos with pocket full of cash and two men enter a bar
After an hour he leaves the bar with empty pockets and only one man returns.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you know that you can get to h**...'s Wikipedia page from any other Wiki page?
1. Click the search bar and type "h**..."
2. Click enter
3. Click the first Wikipedia URL
An infinite number of mathematicians enter a bar
They start ordering beers. The first guy order a beer,the second half a beer,the third one-third of a beer...The bartender shuts down the bar.
An American, a German and a Russian enter a bar
The bartender says: Is this a joke or what?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
4 gay guys enter a bar...
There is only 1 stool left. How do they share it?
....
Flip it upside down
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three guys enter a bar and kill 4 people
Shortly after o**... goes on his phone, the other goes to the bathroom, the third guy sighs and says to himself: I guess they went afk
A man enters a bar with a shotgun
He yells: "Who slept with my wife?!"
The barman says: "Are you crazy?! You'll not have enough ammo!"
A guy enters in a bar, angry af, with an assault rifle.
The whole place goes silent as he slams the door.
Angry guy : Who in here slept with my wife?!?
Some random guy at the back of the bar starts to laugh.
Angry guy : What's so funny?!?
Random guy : No chance you have enough bullets in that gun !
A man walks into a bar.
He has a pleasant evening drinking with his girlfriend and buddies until the establishment closes.
As he is leaving he steps into a bar
-wood taxi, which he called to take him home.
As the taxi driver is pulling away he hits a bar.
To start the meter.
As the man enters his building he hits a bar.
To open the main entrance.
He steps into a bar,
of artificial light as he pushes the button for the elevator.
Then the man walks into a bar.
Swung directly at his head by his angry wife.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Russian enters a bar full of Turkish people.
He's wearing a t-shirt with bright lettering "turkish got 3 problems."
Just a few seconds later the Turkishs oppose him and say "Hey, yopu know what you're wearing is insulting?"
The russian responds: "This is your first problem: You're so easily offended."
The Turkish respond: "Okay, maybe we should settle this outside."
The Russian: "That's your second problem: You always want to solve your problems with violence."
The Turkish bring him outside and pull their knives.
The Russian: "And here's your third problem. You always bring knives to gun fights."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
One Day a Cowboy Rode into Town
He t**... his horse and entered a saloon
When he exited the saloon, he found his horse missing
The cowboy shouted, "I'm going to go inside for another drink, when I'm done, my horse better be returned. If not, I'll do what I did back in Texas."
The cowboy went back inside the bar, got a drink, and returned to find his horse.
As he saddled up, a man approached him and asked,
"Out of curiosity, what did you do back in Texas?"
The cowboy responded,
"I had to walk home."
P.S. Sorry
An alien enters a bar
An alien enters a bar and shouts the drinks are on me. He shouts out " everybody can drink whatever they want and as much as you want all night long" . So people start ordering bottles of champagne and whisky and beer all night. At the end of the night the drinks are sold out and the bartender says "that was an expensive tab OK that's $133,48,56 you owe me"
The alien then replies " No problem pal BTW have you got change of a zonk?"
A blind man visits texas
A blind man visits Texas. When he gets to his hotel room, he feels the bed. Wow, this bed is big!
Everything is big in Texas, says the bellhop.
The man heads downstairs to the bar, settles into a huge barstool and orders a beer. A mug is placed between his hands. Wow these drinks are big!
The bartender replies, Everything is big in Texas.
After downing a few, the blind man asks where the bathroom is. Second door to the right, says the bartender.
The blind man heads for the bathroom but accidentally enters the third door, which leads to the swimming pool, and he falls in. Popping his head up from under the water and flailing his arms, he shouts, Don't flush, don't flush!
Bigger in Texas
A blind man visits Texas. When he gets to his hotel room, he feels the bed. Wow, this bed is big!
Everything is big in Texas, says the bellhop.
The man heads downstairs to the bar, settles into a huge barstool and orders a beer. A mug is placed between his hands. Wow these drinks are big!
The bartender replies, Everything is big in Texas.
After downing a few, the blind man asks where the bathroom is. Second door to the right, says the bartender.
The blind man heads for the bathroom but accidentally enters the third door, which leads to the swimming pool, and he falls in. Popping his head up from under the water and flailing his arms, he shouts, Don't flush, don't flush!