Enjoy Jokes
155 enjoy jokes and hilarious enjoy puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about enjoy that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Learn how to enjoy jokes and lighten up your life! Read jokes from different mediums like Employed, Unemployed and Indulge, find out why humor is important and how it can help you enjoy your day more.
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Funniest Enjoy Short Jokes
Short enjoy jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The enjoy humour may include short celebrate jokes also.
- Girls, if a guy remembers your birthday, saves your pictures knows what you enjoy and understands your family and friends, This guy is not your man.
This guy is Mark Zuckerberg. - Really enjoying my new life aboard the giant space station designed to solve Earth's overpopulation problem . Just a bit weird how the sun gets slightly bigger in my cabin window every day.
- Anyone know where a guy can find someone to hang out with, maybe have a few beers with, talk to, and kinda just enjoy spending time with? Asking for a friend.
- I used to work in a bakery, didn't really enjoy it and the pay wasn't great... I just kneaded the dough
I'm sorry, I'll leave now... - I work in a prison, and when people ask me if I enjoy my job... ...I tell them that it has it's pros and cons.
- My girlfriend told me I'm bad in bed I told her she should learn to enjoy the little things in life
- Not all construction work is equally enjoyable. For instance, drilling a large hole is boring, but fastening two pieces of metal together is riveting.
- 3/15 is The Ides of March. Do you know what time it officially starts? At two
.
.
If ya love Shakespeare then ya love a groaner. Enjoy! - Saying "have a nice day" to someone, sounds friendly But "enjoy your next 24 hours" sounds threatening.
- Why do kids hate coffee, but adults enjoy it? Because, when you're a kid, coffee is the bitterest experience you've had in life.
Share These Enjoy Jokes With Friends
Enjoy One Liners
Which enjoy one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with enjoy? I can suggest the ones about smile and have a good day.
- As a wizard, I enjoy turning objects into glass. Just wanted to make that clear.
- Doctors say 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea. That means one person enjoys it
- What do you call a Russian that enjoys programming? Computin.
- Why didn't Han Solo enjoy his steak dinner? It was Chewie.
- I quite enjoy blowing air around a room. In fact, I'm a big fan.
- I Don't care what any of you say.. My Alzheimer's lets me enjoy this site everyday
- How does a New Zealander find a sheep in long grass? Rather enjoyable
- Does Lance Armstrong enjoy cycling? Of course he does! He has a ball!
- I never really used to enjoy peer pressure But then my friends got me into it.
- What kind of coffee did Italians most enjoy during the 1940s? Oppresso.
- I started working for a pizza company I don't enjoy it, I just knead the dough
- I enjoy working in a slaughterhouse.. Everything is so cut and dry.
- What do people in the hood enjoy eating? Spaghetto
- Why does the lion not enjoy cooked vegetables? He prefers them roar.
- How do you know people enjoy eating clocks? They're always having seconds.
Enjoy Your Day Jokes
Here is a list of funny enjoy your day jokes and even better enjoy your day puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Yesterday was National Girlfriend day and my girl friend really enjoyed it .. ... my wife .. not so much.
- What do lawyers wear to court? Lawsuits! 😂
Courtesy of the popsicle I just enjoyed. Had to share. Have a great day. - Why is it hard for Liam Neeson to enjoy Valentine's Day? Because all the girls are taken
- For those without a date for Valentines Day... I have one for you!
It's February 14th.
You're welcome! Enjoy it! - I changed my last name to 'Batman' the day before my wedding My Father-in-Law didn't enjoy the wedding of Dan and Anna BATMAN.
- it's international Talk Like A Pirate Day! enjoy a cross-re-post. What's a Pirate's favourite letter?
You'd think it'd be r, but a pirate's first love is the C. - Wednesday and Thursday were named after the Norse Gods Odin and Thor... And if you really enjoy facts about Norse Gods then today is your Loki-day!
- To this day I still tell Chuck Norris jokes. He's a good friend of mine and enjoys a good joke.
- I read an article the other day. It was rather specific but i hope you all enjoy it too. The
- Dad, I really enjoyed pi day! Great! Just too bad it only comes a-round once a year.
Followed by my daughter shaking her head and the wifey groan.
Enjoy Life Jokes
Here is a list of funny enjoy life jokes and even better enjoy life puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Everyone has a certain joke they always tell when meeting new people Personally, I enjoy talking about my life
- Studies show that 4 out of 5 men suffer from diarrhea at some point in their life. Why are 1 out of 5 men enjoying it??
- Why are there no psychics who enjoy life Happy mediums don't exist
- Life is pretty much like Netflix If you eliminate your standards completely, there's more to enjoy
- One of the most wonderful things in life is to wake up and enjoy a cuddle with somebody I know my cellmate loves it
- Life is like a box of chocolates You're not going to enjoy it if you're anorexic
- My clothing store is using a life sized Darth Vader figurine to model their clothing line I, for one, really enjoy mannequin skywalker
- I highly respect microscopes they teach us to enjoy the little things in life.
- We all love to spend lots of money buying new clothes.... .....but we never realise that the best moments in life are enjoyed without clothes....!
- Every since I divorced my wife life has been so much better Turns out I really enjoy living in my own Accord
Enjoy Your Jokes
Here is a list of funny enjoy your jokes and even better enjoy your puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I'm like a cat when it comes to kids I don't really enjoy the product
But I love playing with the box it came out of. - The doctor asked Fred if anyone in the family suffers from mental illness. Fred replied: "No, we all seem to rather enjoy it."
- A man goes to the movies and sees a large dog sitting next to a woman watching the film He says to her "I am surprised your dog is enjoying this movie"
The woman replies "Me too, he hated the book" - Two cannibals are enjoying dinner. One compliments the other, "I say, Bill, your wife really makes a great meal."
- My wife is turning 62 tomorrow. I tell her not to get too excited as she will only have one minute to enjoy it. Confused, she asked, "what do you mean?" It's your sixty second birthday.
- Why do Instagram influencers enjoy shopping at Walmart so much? They just can't get enough of the self-checkout.
- My psychiatrist asked me if anyone else suffered from mental illness in my family. I answered " No they all seem to enjoy it"
- Clever Husband. Husband: Today is Sunday & I have to enjoy it. So I bought 3 movie tickets.
Wife: Why Three?
Husband: It's for you and your parents. - My therapist said that I should do whatever I find enjoyable and calming. Now there is blood everywhere.
- Making bread is very addictive First I was enjoying just mixing the ingredients. But after a while I kneaded it.
Cheerful Fun Enjoy Jokes for Lovely Laughter
What funny jokes about enjoy you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean entertain jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make enjoy pranks.
My girlfriend asked me why I work at the bakery if I don't enjoy it.
I told her it's because I knead the dough.
Here's another Diarrhea joke
If 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea, then does one enjoy it?
Depressed race car mechanic.
Scene: a psychiatrists practice:
'Doc, I'm a mechanic I work for a racecar driver. It's utterly depressing ... I get to fix his car up, maintain it, tune it to perfection. But never -not once- have I been allowed to take it for a spin. It's crushing a depressing to think that such a wonderful thing is out there purring, but I'll never get to enjoy it. ...'
'Well sir, I think I understand just fine, my brother in law has the exact same problem.'
'Is he a mechanic too doc?'
'No, a gynecologist'
Three women and ducks
Three women die in a car accident and go to heaven when they are at the gate god tells them that there is only one rule and that is that you may not step on a duck. They women enter and do their best to enjoy heaven while being cautious about where they step for there are ducks everywhere. After about a week one of the three women steps on a duck and suddenly this old, smelly, repulsive and hairy man is chained to her for life. This only makes the other women more careful and another month passes by when a second of the three women steps on a duck. Then chained to her is a man more repulsive then the first. The third woman becomes ever so cautious and make it a whole year without treading upon a duck. Chained to her is a handsom, muscular and wonderful gentleman. She says to him "What happened to you?" he replies " I stepped on a duck..."
"Who was the Windows programmer's favorite hip-hop group?"
"Run-CMD"
(I came up with this one at work after repeatedly opening the command prompt. Not sure if it's been said before, but I hope you enjoy!)
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Next time somebody tries to argue using statistics....
Remind them that 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang r**....
STDs are like sweets....
I enjoy giving them to little children
A women invites 3 military men to her house
During WW2 many families near military bases would invite service men over to their house for an evening to forget about the war, and to enjoy a home cooked meal. So a women calls the military base and says she would like to invite 3 men over but expresses that they CANNOT be Jews. Absolutely no Jews. The base commander says fine he will send 3 over on Sunday. She agreed and hanged up. On Sunday a jeep drives up and 3 black men got out of the vehicle. The women is in shock and asks the men is this a mistake? Surely this HAS to be a mistake! One of the men replies, "No ma'am, Captain Goldstein never makes a mistake."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
i enjoy Sean Connery's accent as much as the next guy...
but im never going to say "sit on my face" to my girlfriend while having s**... again.
Our neighbors got really annoyed at me after I played catch with their son yesterday.
But in fairness, I couldn't find a ball, and the kid actually seemed to enjoy getting tossed back and forth. So I don't know what the big deal is.
My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.
We'll see about that.
I heard this at work and thought it was clever. Enjoy
I asked a girl back to my place to enjoy the works of Michel Houellebecq.
But she said she ain't no Houellebecq girl.
Why does Shang Tsung always enjoy a religious song from Finland?
Because it's a Finnish hymn.
The doctors say I suffer from insanity, but they have it all wrong.
I enjoy every minute of it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Rich Woman And Her Butler
A rich couple was going out for the evening. The lady of the house decided to give the butler,
Throckmorton, the night off.
She said they would be home very late and he should just enjoy his evening.
As it turned out, the wife didn't have a good time at the party, so she came home early.
She walked into the house and eyed Throckmorton sitting alone in the dining room.
She called for him to follow her. She led him to the master bedroom.
She closed and locked the door. She looked at him and smiled.
"Throckmorton. Take off my dress." He did so, carefully.
"Throckmorton. Take off my stockings and garter." He silently obeyed her.
"Throckmorton. Remove my bra and p**...." The tension mounted as he complied.
Finally she looked at him and said,
"Throckmorton. If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired."
I enjoy rating countries on a 0-10 scale
I give Nepal a solid 7.8. The score is so high, it's ground breaking
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do k**... ghosts enjoy?
Boo-kake
What does the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?
"Make me one with everything."
The vendor makes him the hot dog and the Buddhist hands him a $20 bill. The vendor hands him his hot dog and then the Buddhist sits down at a nearby table to enjoy it. Soon after, to the Buddhist's dismay, he realizes the vendor hasn't been forthcoming with the rest of his money. He knows the hot dog couldn't have been $20, so the Buddhist approaches the vendor and says:
"Excuse me, where's my change?"
To which the vendor replies:
"Change comes only from within."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I read that 1 in 5 women suffer from mental illness
so I guess that means the other 4 must enjoy it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Started teaching my son and his friends Karate...
I'm not qualified I just really enjoy k**... children.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A mom buys an old parrot from a w**.....
A mom buys an old parrot in a w**... and proceeds to bring it home for the family to enjoy their new pet.
As she brings the parrot inside the house the parrot says "ah, new house!" and she bursts in laughter.
Later that day, the daughters arrive from school and promptly the parrot says "ah, new house, new prostitutes!" and they all burst in laughter.
Some time goes by, and after a long day of work the dad finally arrives home, and without wasting time, the parrot says "ah, new house, new prostitutes, same old customers. Good night Mr. Williams"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you know that West Virginia's state sport is s**...?
It's a game the whole family can enjoy!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do Farts Smell so Bad?
So the deaf can enjoy them too.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I love Taco Bell so much that I even enjoy being *asked* what style of tacos I want...
I get hard every time.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Do not fap on a plane..
Unless you enjoy h**...
I treat my women like I treat my super cars
I enjoy them a lot and they only exist in my dreams
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Relaxing location
While my parents were making their f**... arrangements, the cemetery salesman pointed out a plot that he thought they would like. You'll have a beautiful view of the swan pond, he assured them.
Dad wasn't sold: Unless you're including a periscope with my casket, I don't know how I'm going to enjoy it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
As a man of Jewish descent
As a man of Jewish descent I don't like jokes about us Jews.
I think they often cement prejudices and misinterpretations of the Jewish people and culture.
But every now and then even I enjoy a good laugh and feel that I shouldn't be so serious about everything.
So I have a very good joke about the holocaust here if anyone wants to buy it?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
If you want to have s**... with a frog, use a c**...
If you want to enjoy it, rib it
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My ex-girlfriend used to have this strange f**......
She used to enjoy being strangled until she turned blue in the face.
It's too bad that I am colorblind.
I was talking to my friend over the weekend, when he brought up the subject of hobbies....
He asked, "What do you do in your free time".
To which I responded, "I stalk people".
"Oh", he exclaimed, "Really? I enjoy walks in the park or going to movies with friends".
"I know"
Two chemists walk into a bar...
The first says the the bartender,
"I'll have some H2O,"
After which the second says
"I'll have some H2O too."
And they both enjoy their water, and get home safely to their families, because the bartender is a nice, reasonable man who would never serve Hydrogen Peroxide to a customer.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man goes to Japan on business and hires a p**....
He doesn't speak any Japanese and she barely speaks any English. While they are going at it she yells out, "Gama Su! Gama Su!" Knowing that she has been satisfied he goes to bed.
The next day he plays golf and one of his associates gets a hole in one. Everyone goes crazy, so to enjoy in the excitement he yells, "Gama Su! Gama Su!"
Everybody goes silent and one of his Japanese associates says, "What do you mean wrong hole?"
Tommy comes back off his holiday with his mum and his step dad and the teacher asks him...
"Hello Tommy, did you enjoy your holiday?"
"I did Teacher"
"And did your stepdad take you out, show you things, go exploring?"
"Yes he did teacher, he took me out rowing 1/2 a mile into the lake every day, and then I'd swim back."
"Oh, well, um, it's an awful long way to swim isn't, 1/2 a mile?"
"Oh no teacher, no, it was easy once I'd got out of the bag!"
A man walks into a coffee shop
Cashier: congratulations, you are our thousandth customer! Enjoy this complimentary bagel.
Man: hey thanks!
Cashier: of course, and it's only two dollars!
Man: i thought you said it was complimentary?
Cashier: it is
Bagel: you have beautiful eyes
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Life is like s**...
Religious people don't want you to enjoy it.
Do you work on weekends?
My boss just asked, "Do you think you can come in on Saturday this week? I know you enjoy your weekends, but I need you here."
I replied, "Yeah, no problem. I'll probably be late though as the public transport is bad on weekends."
He said, "Okay, when do you think you'll get here then?"
I said, "Monday."
Most people enjoy being tickled a few times.
But the Japanese really love ten tickles, from what I've heard.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An army captain approaches a p**... and asks her, "Would you enjoy my company for $100?"...
She looks at the handsome military officer and says, "Of course, I would be glad!"
Captain replies, "COMPANY! FORWARD!"
What do indecisive people enjoy doing?
I don't know.
Haunted castle
A young American tourist went on a guided tour of a creepy old castle in England. "How did you enjoy it?" The guide asked when it was over.
"It was great," the tourist replied, "but I was afraid I was going to see a ghost in some of those dark passageways."
"No need to worry," said the guide "I've never seen a ghost in all the time I've been here."
"How long is that?" the tourist asked.
"Oh, about 300 years."
In limerick's a neat way to write...
In limerick's a neat way to write.
One can enjoy it most all day and night.
It's easy and fun,
a few lines and you're done.
I hope I can learn how to write one some day.
5 out of 5 people enjoy Russian Roulette.
There was supposed to be a sixth, but he never got back to me about his experience.
My friend had purchased an extra stand-up comedy ticket for me. I turned him down.
After all, I could never enjoy jokes at other people's expense.
A woman's on vacation and calls home
She asks her husband, "How's my cat doing?"
The husband says, "The cat's dead."
The woman's upset and says, "Well, you could have broken the news to me when I got home. I can't enjoy my vacation now. You could've just said a little white lie, like the cat's on the roof and you can't get her down."
"Okay, I'm sorry," says the husband, "I'll remember that."
The woman says, "Anyway, how's my mother doing?"
The husband says, "Your mother's on the roof and we can't get her down."
As a girl, I really enjoy having my hair short.
Because now the only thing I can let down is my parents.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
s**... is like steak
you may enjoy it raw but that's how you get diseases
What happened at the cannibal's wedding party?
They toasted the bride and groom...
My 7yo told me I had to post this. Enjoy the giggle!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Is it really that wrong to hate an entire race?
I just find marathons waaaaay too long to enjoy any part of them.
How do you make people forget everything they love?
Get them in a group and tell them to say their name and something they enjoy doing.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
If you s**... at playing the trumpet...
...that's probably why.
My neighbor who had horrible jokes passed away this week. This was one of his favorites. Enjoy a good (bad) pun in his memory.
Son: Dad! Dad! There is a monster under my bed!
Dad: Enjoy it while you can son, when you get married the monster sleeps in your bed
I was eating a cheeseburger when I was confronted by a vegan.
The vegan said I should give up killing and eating cows, he said I should start eating vegan. If prepared right, you will get more vitamins and enjoy it more.
At the end of the day, he was right, cooked properly, he was delicious.
My 8 year old claims to have just made this up and it made me chuckle. I hope you enjoy too. What is your mouth's favorite exercise?
What is your mouth's favorite exercise?
Burpees
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
You can never enjoy a game of Chess against an Australian.
Everytime he checks, you'll think he's won the game.
My doctor asked if I suffer from insanity.
I replied: No, I enjoy every minute of it.
To Non-USA Redditor's
You all thought trying to enjoy Reddit without enduring US politics was hard?
Welcome to 2021 where we introduce you to our stock market!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I'm going to an open casket f**... later, and I'm not sure if I'll enjoy it or not...
Remains to be seen.
What type of tea is the only type Brits don't enjoy?
Penaltea.
