English Translation Jokes
52 english translation jokes and hilarious english translation puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about english translation that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest English Translation Short Jokes
Short english translation jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The english translation humour may include short english small jokes also.
- What do women put on their ear to look more attractive?... Their knees.
(Not sure if this one translates well to english) - I want to try translating a Finnish joke to English and see if it works. What is the animal that steals license plates?
- A turtle. - I wanna see if this Pittsburgh joke translates into English Didjinz gise no dem stillers er gun win da souper bull?
- My French teacher refuses to give me the the translation to some english words Feels like he's trying to sabotage me.
- I was telling my friend in London a joke... ...but I wasn't sure it would translate well into English.
- I was trying to read a German leader's autobiography. My struggle to translate the German to English was intense.
- Some friends of mine are like a few french words translated to english False Friends ~~i cri~~
- I've translated a popular russian joke to english, Wanna hear your reaction))) That's What she said !
- Non-native English speakers, try to literally translate jokes from your own language We might get some weird/funny stuff
- The motto of the French navy Translated into English, it is, "To the water, it is the hour"
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English Translation One Liners
Which english translation one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with english translation? I can suggest the ones about english speaking and english new.
- What does "Kremlin" translate to in English? White House.
- What does "Maginot Line" get translated to in English? Speed bump ahead
- We all know what cinco de mayo translate to in English... St. Patrick's Day.
Cheerful English Translation Jokes for Unforgettable Laughter with Friends!
What funny jokes about english translation you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean english love jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make english translation pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Another joke translated to English from my Uncle.
Little "peter" was in class when his teacher was talking about fruits, and she brought up the question, "Which fruits can be s**... on or smothered?"
A boy raised his hand and said, "An orange!" The teacher replied, "yes, correct!"
A girl raised her hand as-well and said, "A peach, teacher!" To which the teacher also agreed.
Finally, little Peter raised his hand and said, "A set of PJ's!"
The teacher, confused, said, "no, you cant s**... PJ's..."
Peter quickly replied, "Then why did the other night my Mom told my Dad, 'take off your pj's cause I'm going to s**... it."
It's better in Spanish = \
A Chinese joke translated to English
A lion is getting married in jungle. There is a big bash and all animals are dancing to the tune of loud music being played.
In a corner, a rat is dancing too.
Rat is asked, "Hey! Why are you dancing?
Rat replied, "It's my brother's marriage, so only."
"When did the lion become you brother?"
The Rat: "Before marriage I was a lion too."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A mouse and an elephant
A male mouse and female elephant, which are very much in love with each other, are having s**... in the jungle. Mr mouse does his best, but if course miss elephant didn't really enjoy it.
Monkeys up in the trees see the scene and decide to throw coconuts at them. Miss elephant is hit on the head and tell "ouch"
Mister mouse stops and asks, worried "Did I hurt you?"
(Translated from French, sorry for my English)
Speaking in German in Texas
In Texas, there is a town named New Braunfels, where there is a large
German-speaking population.
One day, a local rancher driving down a country road noticed a man using his
hand to drink water from the rancher's stock pond.
The rancher rolled down the window and shouted: "Sehr angenehm! Trink das Wasser
nicht. Die kuehe haben darein geschissen." (Translated: "Glad to meet you!
Don't drink the water. The cows have crapped in it.")
The man shouted back: "I'm from New York and just down here campaigning for
Obama's health care plan. I can't understand you. Please speak in English."
The rancher replied: "Use both hands."
Que dijo la persona que estaba callendo de un edificio muy muy alto en diciembre?
Feliz gravidad!
(Translation: What did the person falling from the very very tall building in december say?
Happy Gravity!)
Hopefully this translates well into English..
A man is sitting on a park bench reading a book called "Logic" and another man walking past sits down beside him and asks what logic means..
The man reading the book asks, "Well, do you have an aquarium at home?"
"Yes! I do!"
"So I'm guessing you have fish in your aquarium?"
"I do!"
"And if you have fish in your aquarium, I'm guessing you like animals..?"
"Yes, I like animals!"
"And if you like animals, I would say you like people as well?"
"Yes, I like I people.."
"And if you like people, I guess you like women too?"
"Oh yes, I LOVE women!"
"Well there you go, that's what logic is!"
The man contemplates the answer he received and is satisfied with it and is about to get up to leave, when he asks: "What would've happened if I said that I didn't have an aquarium at home?"
The man on the bench thinks to himself for a minute and answers, "Well, you would've obviously been gay then".
My chemistry teacher pulled this on us today.
We were reviewing balancing chemical equations and got onto the topic of changing the names of compounds into their symbols so we could start balancing them. My teacher starts, "Changing names into symbols, is very much like translating Spanish into English. Maria estudia. Maria studies. Carlos va a la biblioteca. Carlos goes to the library. Now I would have said prison but I don't know how to say that in Spanish."
Difference between a tragedy and a disaster
A boy asks his dad the difference between tragedy and a disaster. The father answers "a tragedy is if we were on a boat and your mother falls off the boat into the water". "So what's a disaster" asks the boy, "if your mother knows how to swim" says the father.
Sorry for my poor English, this joke is translated
The hiker and the shepherd.
A hiker is walking through the countryside, and he sees a shepherd with a flock of sheeps.
He asks the shepherd:
- Hey, good friend! How much wool do the sheeps give?
- The white ones or the black ones?
Confused, the hiker says:
- The white ones...
- About 7 kilos of wool per season.
- And the black ones?
- They too, they too.
- And how much milk do the sheeps give?
- The white ones or the black ones?
- ... the white ones.
- About three liters per week.
- And the black ones?
- They too, they too.
The hiker is starting to feel annoyed by the shepherd and says to him:
- Why do you always answer me with "the white ones or the black ones"
whenever I ask you about your sheeps?
- Well, sir. Because the white ones are mine.
- Ahhhh... and the black ones?
- They too, they too.
(I hope it makes sense. English it's not my first language and I tried to translate it as accurate as possible).
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Proctologist visit
*This is and old joke, sorry if it does not translate as well to english.
*
A man goes to a proctologist, for a check up.
The doctor, after some small talk ask him to drop trousers, and bend over. He l**... his finger and stick it in.
After a minute the doctor says.
Doctor - Sir, i have bad news. I am afraid you are going to have to stop m**....
The man clearly is taken aback from this preposterous comment, and just manages to say "why?"
The doctor calm as ever, and still wearing him as a ventriloquist doll says: "Cause I am still in the room performing this exam."
The fly and me
I'm translating this joke from my native language so I'm hoping its just as funny in English.
The other night I saw a mosquito in my room. I kept trying to catch it till I caught it in a corner, ready to end its life, when all of a sudden it turned around and said "Wait! Surely you won't kill your own family!", I stopped in my tracks and stared at the mosquito thinking what it meant. Then I realised the mosquito wasn't lying... My blood was coursing through its veins
My attempt to translate an old Polish joke to English
> A policeman approaches a man drinking beer in park and asks him for his documents. Student hands him the documents and the policeman begins reading aloud:
> -ahh, I see we don't have a job.
> -no, we don't.
> -we're jerking around all day.
> -yes, we are.
> -Oh! We are students!
> -No, only I am.
Not 100% sure if I translated it well, improvements welcome:
Interview
p.s: sorry about my english im not an native english speaker, this is the translation from my country joke (indonesia)
A woman came to a job interview. Then the interviewer says: "You have 2 choices, do you prefer me to ask you 10 easy questions, or 1 difficult question?"
After thinking for a while, the woman choose 1 difficult question. Then the interviewer asks: "Which came first, the night or the day?"
Without even thinking, The woman answer:"THE NIGHT, Sir."
Curious, The interviewer asks again:"How can you be so sure Night came first?"
"Sorry sir, but you promised me only one difficult question."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Genetic link to male ageing and stress found
in the x**... s**... chromosome.
Hopefully it translates well enough into english.
Jesus walks into a bar
The barman looks up and asks "We don't serve wine here"
Jesus looks at him quizzically and goes to look for a Spanish translator because he had just immigrated from Mexico and English was not his first language.
A Polish joke translated to english
Two guys were living in the same apartment building in identical flats. The first guy visits the second one and sees that he just painted his flat and it looks great.
"This looks amazing" the first guy says and asks how many cans of paint he bought. The second guy says he bought seven.
The next day the first guy drives to the store, buys seven cans of paint and starts painting his flat. After few hours he finishes the whole thing but he realises that he used only three cans of paint.
He calls the second guy:
"Hey man I've just finished painting the whole place, but I've used only 3 cans of paint and I have 4 left!"
Second guy - "Yeah, me too."
I translated an Ewokese joke into English
An Ewok marches into a cantina and says to the bartender, I'll have a Jawa Juice and …… Bantha milk.
The bartender says, Sure thing—but why the little pause?
Not sure, says the Ewok. I've had them all my life.
*Yub Nub!*
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An Indian joke translated to english
A teenage girl wearing a skirt climbing up a staircase sees boys on the ground floor looking up and laughing. She goes to her mom and complains.
Girl: "Mom, boys saw me climbing up the stairs and were laughing"
Mom: "Oh dear, they must be laughing cuz they could see your p**..."
Girl: "But I wasn't wearing any!"
Swimming
So i translated this Serbian joke (but i dont speak english good) hope that u will get it
Two friends are talking and one say :
-My mom married again, and my step-father is teaching me how to swim!
-So, how is it going?
-Nice! I already learned how to get myself out of the sack!
About 3.000 years ago, lived the Egyptians. In their time, they build the pyramids.
As it should be...
I think, if you're going to build pyramids.
You should do it in your own time.
(Sorry if my English isn't that great, I translated it from my language.)
A patient with insomnia goes to a doctor
A patient with insomnia goes to a doctor. (Russian Joke)
P: "Doc, I just can't fall asleep. Thousands of thoughts enter my mind and I stay awake through the night."
Doc: "here take (MiraLax - or alternative strong laxative) and it should help you"
P:" will this help me fall asleep?
Doc: "No, but you will only have one thing on your mind"
Sorry, translated this from Russian, may not be as funny in English
Friend who lives in Russia told me this joke
(English isn't my first language, sorry if the translation isn't the best)
The phone rings at 10 Downing Street.
- Hello, mister Putin would like to speak with Theresa May.
- I'm afraid she's currently sleeping.
- Very well, if she wakes up please tell her that mister Putin would like to talk to her.
- Will do.
- Thank you. *hangs up*
- Wait. What do you mean "if"?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I want to try translating an Iraqi joke to English and see if it works. A man is sitting in a cafe...
A man is sitting in a cafe when suddenly someone he knows comes running to him in panic shouting "Quick, your wife is cheating on you with your best friend in the forest". The man runs out of the cafe angry and furious to see for himself and returns after a short while and sits back down on his chair. The people in the cafe and the guy that told him are confused and ask what happened. The man says "this son of a b**... was just exaggerating, firstly, it was just a couple of trees he made it out like it was a forest, secondly, best friend he says?! It turns out I don't even know the guy". Thank you
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
With all the recent posts it is my turn too to see if this French joke translates well to English
I f**... in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries
Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time
Translated a joke from Japanese
Japanese has a lot of pun-filled jokes that I don't think would translate well into English without explanation, but here is one of my favorite Japanese jokes that I think could translate well...
Question: A truck is carrying eggplant, tomatoes, and pumpkins. It hits a sharp turn. What fell?
Answer: Its speed.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Hopping onto the trend of jokes translated into English, here's one from my family in Bosnia
Two men are sitting together and talking, the first asks, "Do you love your wife?"
The second replies, "Of course I love my wife!"
The first then says, "Ok but how much?"
The second man isn't sure how to answer, so the first man asks, "Say your wife is being attacked by a bear, what would you do?"
The second man simply says, "s**... bear."
Joke translated to English from German
A blonde is driving home when she gets pulled over by a police officer.
"Mam, may i see you driving license?!"
"What's a driving license? "
"You know this thing in your purse with your face on..."
She starts digging through her purse, finds her cosmetic mirror, and hands it over to the policeman.
The policeman takes a look at the mirror and responds-
"Should have told me right away your a police officer too "
I want to see if this joke translates from English
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana?
Here my attempt to translate a Dutch joke in English
2 blond girls meet up. The first girl asks the other: "which is further away, the moon or Australia?" The other things about this long and hard and comes back with her answer after an hour: "the moon is closer, definitely the moon." "How come?" asks the first girl. "Well," says the other "we can see the moon every night, do you ever see Australia?"
A crying jewish man goes to the synagogue
He stumbles to the floor and just lies there, sobbing and crying.
Suddenly he hears a voice from above: "What's wrong my child?".
"Oh", cries the man, "it is horrible. My son got baptized."
"Happened to me too", says the voice. "In the end I had to write a New Testament".
PS: Translation of a German joke, I hope it still works in English.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I translated this joke into English from my native language
Woman goes to the witch and asks what will she accomplish in her life the witch says: You will cause death of 60 million people,, Woman runs through whole city and when she gets to her house she sees a small boy sitting in the middle of the road and big truck coming towards him she grabs him takes him off the road sits on a bench next to him and asks: whats your name little boy?,,
The boy answers: Adolf h**...,,
A joke by Mirza Ghalib (renowned Urdu / Persian poet) translated into English
Not sure if the humor is lost in translation but I found it hilarious. Anyway here goes:
I got drunk under the influence of love and told her that she's my Goddess;
I immediately sobered up when she told me that Goddesses are worshipped by many.
At an international military convention during the Cold War,
various generals from around the world gathered to brag about their accomplishments. An American general stood up and proudly stated, "In the US military, all of our soldiers get 3000 calories a day and we can raise it to 5000 during periods of hard training."
A Soviet general, upon hearing this, glared at his American counterpart, pulled out his notepad, and started scribbling furiously. Before the next general could speak, he slapped the table, pointed at the American, and shouted, "You liar! No soldier could possibly eat 7 kilograms of potatoes a day!"
I heard this joke while studying Russian in Georgia. Hopefully it translates to English ok :)
What's the difference between God and a doctor?
When God is angry, he sends you to the doctor.
When the doctor becomes angry, he sends you to God.
( PS: I translated this joke from my native language to English. Would've sounded better if I delivered this joke in my native language.)
Traditional joke from my childhood... I am the first person to translate this to English LoL
There was a young boy that always struggled to cross the road, every time he tried to cross the road he got hit by a car...
One time he was crossing the road and he made it to the other side!
He jumped for joy!
...He got hit by a plane midair.
Pardon me but I live in France and am writing this by Google Translate. Thank my God for modern day technology. I am speaking French into my phone this moment and I get the English translation. Father, if you are reading this, I need to tell you about my true sexuality and why I have no girlfriend.
I like ten.
Hot dog
(Half of this joke is translated from another language so i don't know if it's as good as the original when told in English)
Two foreigners come to United States for the first time.
They have very little knowledge about U.S. culture,
So they stop at a fast food place.
One sees hot dog on the menu and is shocked.
He tells his friend " look they eat dogs in U.S."
Intrigued he says he will try it
When his order arrives, he turns to his friend and says:
With my luck guess which part of the dog i got.