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Engineering Students Jokes

58 engineering students jokes and hilarious engineering students puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about engineering students that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Engineering Students Short Jokes

Short engineering students jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The engineering students humour may include short arts students jokes also.

  1. I hate it when engineering students refer to themselves as engineers... Like you don't see med students calling themselves doctors or arts students calling themselves unemployed.
  2. Don't you just hate it when med students call themselves doctors? I mean you don't see engineering students calling themselves engineers or arts students calling themselves baristas
  3. I hate it when I hate it when engineering students call themselves engineer.
    I don't see medical students calling themselves doctor or history students calling themselves unemployed
  4. I hate it when engineering students call themselves "Engineer" you don't see med students calling themselves doctor, or art students calling themselves unemployed.
  5. Why do so many Muslim students take Intro to Engineering? They heard it was a great place to find 72 virgins.
  6. Engineering students are always confused by women... ....why do the ones with the most streamlined bodies put up the most resistance?
  7. What's the difference between an Engineering student and an Arts student when tying their shoes? The arts student gets a mark for it.
  8. Engineering student Engineering Student: "Professor, we've made something which allows you to see through a wall"
    Professor in excitement asks "Woah and what is that?"
    Student: "A hole"
  9. What's the difference between heaven according to Islam and 60 engineering students? 12 virgins
  10. Why didn't the engineering student have a good relationship with his professor? There were too many truss problems.

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Engineering Students One Liners

Which engineering students one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with engineering students? I can suggest the ones about mechanical engineer and science student.

  1. What did the drunk Statics student say? Truss me, I'm an engineer.

Hilarious Fun Engineering Students Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends

What funny jokes about engineering students you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean engineer jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make engineering students pranks.

What does a graduate student with a science degree ask?
"Why does it work?"
What does a graduate student with an engineering degree ask?
"How does it work?"
What does a graduate student with an accounting degree ask?
"How much will it cost?"
What does a graduate student with a liberal arts degree ask?
"Do you want fries with that?"

Isn't it annoying when engineering students call themselves engineers?

It's s**.... You don't hear medical students calling themselves doctors or arts students calling themselves baristas.

Student in a test

An engineering student was in o**... test. The professor asked him" what do usually ride when you go home ?"
The student answered " the bus"
Professor : cool, tell me what you would do if the weather is hot and the AC is broken
Student : easy, I would open the bus window
Professor : fantastic. Tell me the speed of the air that would come from outside if the bus speed is 60 miles per hour.
Student : dunno ... Professor gave him zero
Outside : the student told his friend about what happened in the test.
Later, the other student went to his o**... test with the same professor.
The professor asked him what do you usually ride when you go home ?
Student : my car
Professor: what if you car is broken
Student : my father's car
Professor : if it's broken
Student : my friend's car
Professor : if you don't have any way other than the bus , what would you ride ?
Student : the bus
Professor : if the AC is not working , what would you do ?
Student : I'm gonna take my jaket off
Professor : if it's still hot
Student : I'm gonna take my tank off
Professor : if it's still hot
Student : take my pants off
Professor : still hot
Student : I'm gonna do everything other than opening the window.

The professors of an engineering school are invited to fly on a new plane

When they arrive, they are told that the plane was built by their students. After hearing this, almost all the teachers run away and leave the plane, except for one.
When is asked "why did you stay in the plane?" He says "i know my students and i am pretty confident that this thing won't even turn on"

Engineering student show up to his lab partner's house with a new bike...

His partner says, "wow.. that's a pretty nice bike you got there."
Engineering student says, "yeah, I was outside my dorm last night when a co-ed rode up on it. She was really drunk. She threw the bike on the ground and took off all of her clothes and said 'you can have whatever you want.'"
Partner says, "it's a good thing you chose the bike... I don't think the clothes would have fit you."

Engineering students

An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess".
He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.
The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week."
The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket.
The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want."
Again the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.
Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?"
The engineer said, "Look I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's cool."

Three engineering students.

Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body.
One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints."
Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections."
The last said, "Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"

Kiss me

"A male engineering student was crossing a road one
day when a frog called out to him and said, If you kiss
me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess. He bent over,
picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket. The frog
spoke up again and said, If you kiss me and turn me
back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for
one week. The engineering student took the frog out
of his pocket, smiled at it; and returned it to his pocket.
The frog then cried out, If you kiss me and turn me
back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want. Again the boy took the frog out,
smiled at it, and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the
frog asked, What is the matter? I've told you I'm a
beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and
do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me? The
boy said, Look I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a
girlfriend, but a talking frog is cool."

Nelson and Deepak, both engineering students, happen to be close friends.

One day, while sitting in a coffee shop, Deepak asks Nelson, "How's it going with your girlfriend?"
Nelson: Ooh, I forgot to tell you, she came to my house yesterday.
Deepak: What happened?
Nelson: Well, I put on some music, and we danced.
Deepak: Then what happened?
Nelson: As we were dancing, we kissed.
Deepak: And? Keep going.
Nelson: I picked her up in my arms and sat her on the table next to my new laptop.
Deepak: You got a new laptop?
Nelson: Yeah, just last week. My parents got it for me.
Deepak: Wow! What configuration?
Nelson: 750 GigaByte drive, 6 Gigs of RAM, 3 GHz processor...
Deepak: HDMI port?
Nelson: Oh yeah.
Deepak: Blu-ray burner?
Nelson: You know it.
Deepak: Awesome man!

A physicist, an engineer and a statistician are on a hunting trip...

... they are walking through the woods when they spot a deer in a clearing. The physicist calculates the distance of the target, the velocity and drop of the bullet, adjusts his rifle and fires, missing the deer 5 feet to the left.
The engineer rolls his eyes. 'You forgot to account for wind. Give it here', he snatches the rifle, licks his finger and estimates the speed and direction of the wind and fires, missing the deer 5 feet to the right.
Suddenly, the statistician claps his hands and yells "We got him!"
SOURCE: One of about three jokes the PhD students from the computational mathematics and statistics know.
-------
Bonus: i**... is a family-wise error.

Engineers

Two engineering students are walking along and the first engineering student asks, "Hey where did you get the new bike?". The second engineering student replies, "It was the craziest day, there I am headed to class and all of a sudden this hot girl rides up to me with the bike. Then she throws the bike down, takes all her clothes off and says 'Take what you want!'". The first engineering student nods his head and says, "Smart choice, there's no way those clothes would've fit".

In the agendas available to all engineering students...

There are helpful tips written by senior students.
One of which reads "Girls are not like chimpanzees, it's okay to make eye contact."

72 virgins

This was it. The s**... bomber was going to blow up the US camp. Little did he know that when he woke up he would be surrounded by 72 engineering students....

Understanding Engineers

Two engineering students were biking across a university campus when one
said, "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer
replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday, minding my own business,
when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike, threw it to the ground,
took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." The first
engineer nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice: The clothes probably
wouldn't have fit you anyway."

Optimist- The glass is half full

Pessimist- The glass is half empty
Engineer- The glass is twice the size it needs to be.
College Student- I can't afford the glass.

An engineering student designed a robot

An engineering student designed a robot who would take his exams for him. The other designed a robot who could cheat off the first robot.

Why do engineering students call themselves engineers?

You don't hear a law student call themselves a lawyer, or a gender studies student call themselves a barista.

A group of engineering proffesors got in a plane...

Before closing the doors, the flight attendants told them that the plane had been built by their own students. Scared, all of the teachers ran out of the plane, except one. The pilot came to him and asked him why he was so relaxed. The proffesor said "I know my students very well. And I'm sure that if this plane is really built by them, the thing won't even start!"

Four students are having a problem with their car...

Four students are having a problem with their car and are forced to stop on the side of the road.
"The ignition is damaged" says the electrical engineer.
"The fuel pipe is clogged" says the chemist.
"Engines is damaged" says the engineer.
"Lets just get out of the car and get in again" says the computer scientist.

An engineering student moved back into his parent's house after graduating

He spent a lot of his time hidden away in his room playing games and arguing with strangers on the internet. One day, he was having a particularly heated conversation on a forum about why Kilograms are a better unit of measurement than Pounds. Then his mother suddenly opened the door without knocking. Shocked, she let out a gasp and quickly turned away as he frantically closed all the tabs in his browser.
Maybe that seems like an overreaction. But what would you do if your mom walked in on you mass-debating?

A nun is teaching class in a Catholic children's home.

She asks the students what they want to be when they grow up. One says a teacher, the other says doctor, the other says engineer and so on. Finally the question lands on quiet little girl in the back.
Nun: What would you like to be when you grow up?
Girl: I'm afraid to say it out loud.
Nun: Then come whisper it into my ear.
The girl scurries over and whispers something. The nuns face boils. She is both shocked and horrified. She screams "What did you say?!?!"
The girl startled yells out " I said I want to be a p**...!"
The nun replies relieved " Oh thank the heavens I thought you said Protestant."

A group of engineering students were discussing the nature of God.

The first student asserts that God is an electrical engineer, because of all the complex information and control signals running around in our nervous system.
The second student explains that God is a mechanical engineer, because of all the different kinds of activities that the human body can be trained to perform.
The third student says that God is a Systems Engineer, because the human brain is essentially a self-programming neural net computer.
The fourth student then quietly states that God is really a civil engineer, because nobody else would run a septic system through a recreational area.

What's the difference between a freshman and a senior electrical engineering student?

A Fourier transform.

Once all the engineering professors were sitting on one plane...

Before the take off an announcement came over the fanboy.
"This plane is made by your students"
Then all professors stood up, ran and went outside, but the principal was sitting.
One professor came and asked "Are you not afraid?"
The principal replied " I trust my students very well and I am sure the plane won't even start"

An engineering student is walking along when a fellow student arrives on a new bicycle

Impressed, he asks, "Where did you got this beautiful bicycle?"
"Well," the second engineering student says, "A couple of days ago I was just walking along when this georgeous blonde pulls up, hops off the bike, rips off all her clothes, and says 'take what you want'."
The other engineering student nods and says "Good choice. The clothes probably wouldn't have fit." 

Ask a counseling student how to reduce stress, they'll discuss mindfulness, work-life balance, etc. Ask an engineering student,

they'll ask back, "Normal or Shear?"

I don't get why engineering students call themselves engineers when they aren't yet

I mean people in med schooling don't call themselves doctors,
law students don't call themselves lawyers,
and art students don't call themselves broke

Electric engineer exam

3 students are getting prepared for the exam.
The teacher calls one in.
Teacher: Do you mind the neon lighting?
First sudent: No.
Teacher: Get out please!
Calls in the next one.
Teacher: Do you mind the neon lighting?
Second student: Yes.
Teacher: Get out please!
Calls in the last.
Teacher: Do you mind the neon lighting?
Last student: It's an argon lamp.
Teacher: Finally! We can start now.

Two engineering students meet on campus one day

The first engineer calls out to the other, "Hey nice bike! Where did you get it?" "Well," replies the other, "I was walking to class the other day when this pretty, young coed rides up on this bike. She jumps off, takes off all of her clothes, and says 'You can have anything you want!'" "Good choice," says the first, "her clothes wouldn't have fit you anyway."

Two engineer students were biking across campus.

One said to the other, "Where did you get such a great bike?"
The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday, minding my own business, when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike, threw it to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want."
The first engineer nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice: The clothes probably wouldn't have fit you anyway."

As an engineering student, I did poorly in differential equations...

...but it never put a damper on my career.

What does a graduate student with a science degree ask? "Why does it work?" What does a graduate student with an engineering degree ask? "How does it work?" What does a graduate student with an accounting degree ask? "How much will it cost?"

What does a graduate student with a liberal
arts degree ask? "you want fries with that?"

Poor planning?

Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, "it was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints." Another said, "no, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections." The last said, "actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"

A college engineering student shows up with a new bike

"Woah where did you get such a nice bike?" his fellow engineering student asked.
"I was walking down the street last night and this g**... her bike came up to me started taking off her clothes and said 'its all yours' so I just took the bike" he said.
His friend replied "Good choice bro the clothes probably didn't even fit you"

Old habits are hard to break.

A woman gynecologist decides she wants to become a mechanic. She enrolls in a technical college and becomes an A student.
Before she can graduate she must pass the final exam, which is dismantling a car engine & rebuilding correctly. When she receives the results of her exam she sees the instructor gave her 150 points. Fearing there must be some error she goes to ask her instructor.
"If 100 is a perfect score, how is it I scored 50 points over?"
The instructor explains, "Well you scored 50 points for taking the engine apart correctly."
"And 50 points for putting it all back together correctly."
"You got the extra 50 points for doing all of it through the muffler!"

Who designed the human body?

Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body.
One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints!"
Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections."
The last one said, "No, actually it had to have been a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through the recreational area?"

An engineering student rides up to his fellow engineering student on a bicycle

His buddy asks him "Where did you get the bicycle?"
"Crazy story! A beautiful blonde rode up to me in this bike, got off, stripped off all her clothes, and told me "take what you want!""
"Good choice, the clothes probably wouldn't have fit anyways..."

3 engineering students

Three engineering students were gathered together discussing who must have designed the human body.
One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints."
Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections."
The last one said, "No, actually it had to have been a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"

Four students are in the car that breaks down

First student, engineering student, says "This is mechanical problem, there's nothing we can do."
Second student, chemistry student, says "You're wrong, this is clearly reason of faulty gasoline. There's nothing we can do."
Third student, electrical engineering student, says "No, there's problem with ignition. There's nothing we can do."
Last student, IT student, says "We should exit car, close the doors, come in and try again. Maybe that will solve the problem."

A group of aeronautics professors walked onto a plane...

They all settled down into their seats when there was an announcement."We have decided to waive your fee since you were responsible for educating our engineer staff on how to construct this fine plane!"
All the professors run out of the plane immediately except one.
When a stewardess asked her why she didn't run out, she responded "If it's made by a student of mine, it will not start!"

Two engineering students were walking across campus when one asked - Where did you get such a great bike?

The second one replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up to me on this bike".
She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want".
The first engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice, the clothes probably wouldn't have fit".

Some Engineering Teachers Sat In a Plane

A group of engineering teachers were invited to sit in a plane. Once everyone was comfortably seated, they were informed that the plane was built by their engineering students. Immediately, all the teachers scrambled to get out of the plane- all but one. When asked why, the teacher responded:
"I have been watching my students closely and understand their ability. I can say with confidence that if they were the ones to build this plane, **this hunk of metal won't even take off.**"

A group of engineering teachers walk onto a plane..

..the teachers were on their way to an engineering confrence. The pilot came on the intercom and welcomed the teachers on board. He then said, "Teachers, we have word that your students completed all the math and physics that went into building this plane."
In a hurry, all the teachers rushed out of their seats and got off the plane. One teacher remained. When they asked him why he didn't rush off the plane with the others, he simply said, "If I know my students, this plane isn't going nowhere."

A group of engineering students and their professor were given free airline tickets to go on a holiday...

Once they boarded the plane, the captain announced that they would be flying on a plane that the students had built.
Every one of the students panicked and left the plane, except for the professor. When the flight attendant asked the professor why he hadn't left the plane too he responded "I know the abilities of my students quite well... this s**... won't even start".

God must be an engineer.

Three engineering students are discussing what sort of God
must have designed the human body. The first says, 'God must be a mechanical engineer.
Look at all the joints."
The second says,"I think God must be an electrical engineer. The nervous system has thousands of electrical connections." The third says, "Actually, God is a civil engineer.
Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"

It's irritating when students get ahead of themselves...

These days many college students assume that they're doing the job already. That's not how it works, you need to get the certification, or get the job.
Engineering students shouldn't call themselves engineers
Medical students shouldn't call themselves doctors
Law students shouldn't call themselves lawyers
Business school students shouldn't call themselves minions
And Art students certainly shouldn't call themselves baristas or waiters...

jokes about engineering students