Empire Jokes

Funniest Empire Short Jokes

Short empire jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The empire humour may include short emperor jokes also.

1. We used to have empires run by emperors, then we had kingdoms run by king.. Now we have countries..
2. A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the Empire State Building... He yells "Don't do it! You have so much potential!"
3. When England had an Emperor, it was an Empire; when it had a King, it was a Kingdom; now they have Theresa May... ...and it is a Country.
4. Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? Of course the Empire State Building can't jump
5. If Nero, Tiberius, Caligula, and Commodus were all in Pompeii together, who would survive? The Roman empire.
6. What do you call the website Chewbacca started that gives out Empire secrets? Wookieeleaks
7. I guess you could say Luke Skywalker single-handedly defeated the empire. I told this joke to someone in a dream, and when I woke up I realized it was actually funny.
8. How can a flea jump higher than the Empire State Building? The Empire State Building can't jump.
9. Where did Luke Skywalker go shopping between Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi? Second Hand Store
10. I passed the empire state building yesterday What confuses me the most is I didn't feel a thing.

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Empire One Liners

Which empire one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with empire? I can suggest the ones about imperial and kingdom.

1. Why is Empire Strikes Back the best star wars movie? It's a perfect 5/7.
2. How was the Roman Empire cut in half? With a pair of caesars.
3. Caesar is dead The Romaine Empire has fallen, Lettuce pray
4. Why couldn't the Empire find the rebel base? They were looking in Alderaan places.
5. How did the Mongol empire become so large? One steppe at a time
6. What do you call a war between india and the UK? The empire strikes back.
7. What was the Ottoman Empire's main export? Sultan pepper
8. Why did King Kong climb the Empire State Building? He had a plane to catch
9. Why does the Empire use Apple? Because they couldn't find the droid they were looking for
10. Where does the Empire buy their robes? The Darth Mall!
11. Why did the Ottoman Empire change into Turkey Because Austria wasn't Hungary anymore.
12. Where do Turkish people go to purchase their furniture? The Ottoman Empire.
13. If Darth Vader lived in America, where would he live? The Empire State Building
14. Who came after Augustus? Septembrus
15. What is the head of the Russian empire's comedic routine called Tsarcasm

Empire State Building Jokes

Here is a list of funny empire state building jokes and even better empire state building puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I can jump higher than the empire state building I rely on the fact that the building can't jump.
• What do you get when you drop an egg off the Empire State Building? New Yolk
• A man falls from the top of the Empire State building. When he hits the ground, a woman walking by screams "oh my God what happened"!!
  The man looks up and says "I don't know, I just got here"
• What's the difference between your mom and the Empire State Building? Not everyone's been up the Empire State Building
• What's gray, and if it gets in your eye, you'll probably die? The Empire State Building
• Why did King Kong.... Climb the Empire State Building?
  ...He couldn't fit in the elevator.
• A man assumed he could fly so he jumped off of the roof of the Empire State Building I guess you could say he jumped to his conclusion.
• How long does it take for a newborn to fall from the empire state building? About 16 seconds
• What's Chinese and climbs the Empire State Building? Ping Pong
• How did the gangster die below the Empire State Building? Someone dropped a dime on him.

Roman Empire Jokes

Here is a list of funny roman empire jokes and even better roman empire puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I used to wonder why my history teachers loved to teach about the Roman Empire so much. I think I get it now. They both hated vandals and goths.
• One day in August, Julius Caesar was standing on the balcony in his palace, watching the leaves drop silently from the trees. He was witnessing….The Fall of the Roman Empire.
• How did Diocletian cut the Roman Empire into 2 empires? By using Caesars.
• What caused the fall of the Roman Empire? The Earth's tilt.
• Want to know why I love the Roman Empire? Want to know why I love the Roman Empire?
  It has the best Senate money can buy.
• Q: You know the Roman Empire, well how do you think it fell?
  A: Chuck Norris
• Why did the Roman empire attacked and destroyed Carthage ? They wasn't Hannibal to pay their debt.

British Empire Jokes

Here is a list of funny british empire jokes and even better british empire puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• british food, British weather and British culture. And thus a great colonial empire of sailors was born.
• Why did the sun never set on the British Empire? Because God did not trust the British in the dark.
• A poem about British history First we were a kingdom, and we had a king.
  Then we were an empire, and we had an empress
  Now we are a country, and we have Nigel Farage.
• If the British empire spoke queens English does that mean.. The Americans spoke rebels tongues.
• The British colonies were pretty unhappy under empirical rule... They really felt like an outlier.
• A short rhyming history of the British Isles First, we were a kingdom, and we had kings.
  Then, we were an empire, and we had emperors.
  Now, we are a country, and we have Brexiteers.
• Q: How many soldiers did the British Empite need to win a war in continental Europe? A: Zero, Continental Allies will do all the fighting and the British Empire will take the credit.
• What is a British person's favorite movie? The Empire Strikes Back
• What do British fans of Star Wars call the Jallianwala Bagh incident? The Empire Strikes Back.
• What did they call the naval troops during the time of The Grand British Empire? "Jarr!"-heads.
  Right, I'll over-sea myself out now.

Ottoman Empire Jokes

Here is a list of funny ottoman empire jokes and even better ottoman empire puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What's the most comfortable empire? The Ottoman Empire.
  And much like that one, I'll see myself out now.
• The leg rests have taken over! Fear the Ottoman Empire!
• During a war with the Ottoman Empire, the Habsburg army lost thousands of men in the battle of Karánsebes, and was forced to flee from the battlefield. Then the Ottomans arrived.
• Why did the Sultan leave his job at Mattress City? He was already a manager at Ottoman Empire
• Pirates Did you hear about the pirate ship caught by the Ottoman Empire and tried for thievery?
  Regrettably, all hands were lost.
• What country was the best at making furniture? The Ottoman Empire.
• I was just thinking about the great empires... After extensive research I found the Ottoman Empire was the only one that took its fall sitting down.
• What was the most comfortable empire? The Ottoman Empire
• What do you call the Ottoman Empire in September? The Autumn Empire.

Empire Strikes Back Jokes

Here is a list of funny empire strikes back jokes and even better empire strikes back puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• The Galactic Empire, after the destruction of the Death Star, has taken to bowling during the interim. The Empire Strikes Back, they call it.
• What's the difference between an umpire and an empire? An umpire gives three strikes, but an Empire Strikes Back.
• Ouch! Meghan slapped Prince Harry in public. He says that if she does it again, the Empire strikes back.
• People keep comparing the election to Empire Strikes Back or Revenge Of The Sith... Personally I would have gone with The Star Wars Christmas Special
• What's next after typhoon Jebi? The empire strikes back!
• Do you think the Tauntaun from The Empire Strikes Back got cold after Han sliced it open? Or do you think it kept lukewarm?
• Luke Skywalker is secretly the real Han Solo Cause after the Empire Strikes Back he was actually Hand Solo

Comical Puns & Laughs: Enjoy Fun, Witty Empire Jokes with Friends.

What funny jokes about empire you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean palace jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make empire pranks.