Emotionally Jokes
45 emotionally jokes and hilarious emotionally puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about emotionally that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article explores the idea of emotionally-based jokes and their place in our culture. Examine the implications of making light of emotionally unstable, unavailable, and abusive situations and how to use humor to create a more secure environment. Learn how to tell emotionally charged jokes in a culturally sensitive way and explore the use of humor to chemically balance negative emotions.
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Funniest Emotionally Short Jokes
Short emotionally jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The emotionally humour may include short emotions jokes also.
- The misuse of users' Facebook data has caused mark zuckerberg significant emotional distress. He asks that you respect his privacy during this challenging time.
- I OBJECT! the defendant screams in court. The judge gives her a very emotional hug and says, No…you human.
- What do you call a 70 year old man trapped in the emotional state of a 14 year old girl? Mr. President.
- I told my suitcases that there will be no holiday this year.... I am now dealing with emotional baggage.
- What do you call mixed emotions? Watching your mother-in-law reverse off a cliff in your brand new car
- I just told my suitcases we aren't going on vacation this year Now I'm dealing with emotional baggage
- There's a stereotype that Scottish men are bad at showing their emotions. This isn't true! I once knew a Scot who loved his wife so much he almost told her!
- As I expected, my therapist told me that I have problems verbalizing my emotions. Can't say I'm surprised.
- As a plumber's assistant, I'm always being ordered around... "Stop that dripping, plug that leak, for God's sake... turn off the water works!" It's not my fault, I'm just an emotional guy.
- A guy found his dog lying in a puddle of blood behind his house He rang the number for the emergency animal rescue.
'Is it moving?' they asked.
'Yes', he replied. 'It's quite emotional.'
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Emotionally One Liners
Which emotionally one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with emotionally? I can suggest the ones about morally and nervously.
- Newton's third law of Emotion. For every male action, there is a female overreaction.
- What do you call the unit that measures emotions? A sentimetre.
- What's a women's favorite thing to play with? My emotions.
- I sold my emotions the other day... Not really sure how I feel about it.
- Why isn't six afraid of seven? Numbers don't have emotions
- Why are exclamation points always so emotional? Because they are always on their period.
- How does a cake show emotions? It tiers up.
(My cake day ends in 2 minutes.. I forgot) - If I had no emotions, I don't know how I'd feel about it.
- Why is anger the new hip emotion? It's all the rage.
- Dear people, don't carry your emotional baggage with you Use your grief-case
- What does Harry Potter play with when he's bored? Ginny Weasley's emotions.
- I got emotional because it's my cake day today Even the cake is in tiers
- I got a 54% on my emotional intelligence test..... I'm not sure how I feel about it.
- Found a surprisingly emotional pornographic film today. It was a real tear jerker!
- What does an emotionally detached mechanic do with a bar hook-up? Nuts and bolts.
Emotionally Unstable Jokes
Here is a list of funny emotionally unstable jokes and even better emotionally unstable puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why is the earth so emotionally unstable? It's a natural effect of being bipolar.
Emotionally Unavailable Jokes
Here is a list of funny emotionally unavailable jokes and even better emotionally unavailable puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I went to a baseball game with my dad last night. It was pretty fun, we even got on the jumbotron! Then I noticed it was the Emotional Unavailability Cam.
- Why did my relationship end? I'm emotionally unavailable.
Emotionally Abusive Jokes
Here is a list of funny emotionally abusive jokes and even better emotionally abusive puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- "I've been in 3 emotionally abusive relationships" Said Dave to his new friend.
"I'm so sorry!"
"Huh. I had them thinking it was their fault as well"
Comical Emotionally Jokes and Gems that Will Get You in Laughter Land
What funny jokes about emotionally you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean verbally jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make emotionally pranks.
Please stop including corny details about your family as a blatant ploy to garner additional upvotes and awards by increasing the emotional impact of your post.
This was said to me just now by my 3 year old. So proud! Got a real eye roll from my wife too, so I know it was a good one. Tinged with sadness though, as it reminds me own dad, who went out to get milk and never came back
Anthony Fauci is giving the President his daily briefing.
He concludes by saying: ''Yesterday, 300 Brazilians died of COVID.'' ''Oh no!'' President Trump exclaims. ''That's terrible!'' His staff are stunned at this uncharacteristic display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands. Finally, Trump looks up and asks: ''How many is a brazillion?''
vintage Bush joke
Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed."
"OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"
His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands.
Finally, the President looks up and asks, "How many is a brazillion?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
life is like a box of chocolates....
it is destroyed remarkably fast by an emotional woman.
The Great Writer
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.
When asked to define great, he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"
He now works for Microsoft writing error messages.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you know that beer contains female hormones?
It's true. You drink too much you get fat, get emotional, talk too much, cry, and you can't drive a car.
All apologies to the fairer s**....
Grammar tip
Farther = physical distance
Further = metaphorical distance
Father = emotional distance
Rita found her husband hanging in his bedroom one morning with a note on his bed reading I can't take the critism anymore.
She quickly cut the rope, brought him down and managed to revive him.
As her husband lay in her arms and slowly opened his eyes, she said emotionally my dear…that's NOT how you spell criticism!
Therapist: Are you aware that you have incredible difficulty verbalizing your emotions?
Man: I can't say I'm surprised.
Therapist: Exactly.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The guys go to the f**... of their life-long pal...
After a long eulogy and some beautiful music, the guys are overcome with emotion. The first guy walks up to the casket of his buddy.
"I know it's just a small token, but for everything you've ever done for me, buddy, all the times you helped me out. This is the least I could do."
He tucks a $50 bill into his buddy's tuxedo pocket, and he staggers away sobbing.
The second man, inspired by the gesture, walks up and places his own $50 bill in his buddy's pocket. "For all the beers you bought me, that I never had a chance to pay you back for." And he staggers away sobbing.
The third man, a lawyer, not to be out-done, says, "I know it's just a small gesture, but for all the times you've been there for me when I needed you, here's a token of my gratitude."
And he writes a check for $150, and takes the two fifties in change.
An emotionally unstable man walks into a 7-11
He browses the candy section and decides to buy a Snickers bar. His total is $1.29. He pays with a $20 bill and tells the cashier to keep whatever is leftover.
"Are you sure?" The cashier says.
"I don't like change." the man replies.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Some nice pair of legs
A group of girls walked by and I jokingly said to my girl "bet you wish you had a pair of legs like that" and she started crying. Smh girls are so emotional so I wheeled her back to the car.
Charlie the Street Car Conductor
Long joke that is passed down in my family
So down in New Orleans there lived a man named Charlie. Charlie ever since he was a young boy wanted to grow up to be a streer car conductor. When he finally became old enough, he applied for the job and lo and behold he got it. Now Charlie was the friendliest street conductor that the city has ever seen. Not only did he never complain about his job, but also he greeted everyone who boarded his street car and treated them like family. Everything in his life was perfect for Charlie until one day he decided to operate the street car after having a few drinks. In his drunken state, he crashed the streetcar and killed all the passengers. After going to court Charlie was sentences to death by the eletric chair. When the day came for his execution, a gaurd visited Charlie's cell and asked him what he wanted for his final meal. Charlie replied, "I want a rotten tomato and a raw fish." After Charlie finished his meal he headed into the execution room and sat down in the eletric chair. The warden gave the order to pull the switch and the room went dark as thousands of volts passed through Charlies body. After the switch was thrown back it came as a suprise that Charlie was in fact still alive. Having no idea what else to do the warden let Charlie out of jail but banned him from ever operating a streetcar in New Orleans. Since street cars were his life Charlie decided "Hey I'll go to Japan, I hear they have fancy new street cars there." In Japan Charlie gets a job as a conductor again, but as before decides that after having a few drinks that he is still able to work the street car. To no suprise Charlie crashes the stree car and kills all the passengers. Charlie again finds himself in jail ordering his last meal. "A rotten tomato and a raw fish," he tells the gaurd. After the meal was eaten, Charlie was led to the chair and once again survives the eletricity. Because he wasn't dying, he was set free but banned from operating the street cars in Japan. Charlie thought to himself, "Well I heard San Francisco still has street cars operating so I'll go there." As you can guess Charlie ends up in the same situation and again orders the same meal " A rotten tomato and a raw fish," he tells the gaurd. The warden from San Francisco had heard of Charlie and his previous death sentences so before he brought Charlie in to be executed he sent a letter to the mayor asking to reroute the city's eletricity to the jail. The mayor approved and confident with his new found power the warden smiled and gave the order to pull the switch. The lights in the room burst from the overload and the smell of something burning overwelmed the air. The warden after a minute ordered the gaurd to shut off the chair and as the smoke cleared, there was Charlie same as always. Distraught with emotion, the warden told Charlie to get out of his sights. Charlie, tired of going to jail, finally decided that maybe he shouldn't be a street car conductor after all. So Charlie travels back to New Orleans and meets his friend Thibodaux at a bar. Thibodaux after a few minutes of small talk tells Charlie "Everyone has heard about the eletric chair incidents and I just gotta axe, how were you able to survive all them jolts of electricity through your body? Was there something you did that made you resistant to it?" Charlie looks at Thibodaux and says "I dunno, I guess I was just a bad conductor."
