The Best 41 Emma Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Emma jokes. There are some emma jen jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these emma ella puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Emma Jokes and Puns

Hermione's son: Mum, you're a witch!

Hermione: Emma Watson?

Europeans: What's a good American joke in your country?

On the heels of the funny Italian joke ("Emma comes first …") what jokes do other countries tell about Americans?

Spelling practice

It is spelling lesson. The teacher asks the kids to spell different words.
-Emma, can you spell 'dog'?
-D O G
-Correct! Jake, can you spell 'cat'?
-C A T
-Correct! Now, Ahmed, can you spell 'racial discrimination'?

Emma joke, Spelling practice

I knew my girlfriend was cheating on me when she texted me saying

I knew my girlfriend was cheating on me when she texted me saying "I'm out for dinner with my friend Emma" because Emma was lying beside me in bed

Why can't Emma Watson ever play Hermione Granger again?

'Cos once you go black, you never go back.

Emmanuel Lubezki walks into a bar

and orders one shot.

"Emma Stone"

An Italian man telling you he's high.

Emma joke, "Emma Stone"

A teacher asked me why my daughter's name was so weird...

She asked why I had spelled it like E.M.M.A instead of just Emma, and I said that it describes the phrase that I told people when I let them know my SO was pregnant,

"Everyone. Makes. Mistakes. Alright?"

I already got a date this valentine's day. Her name is Emma,

Emma Gination.

Everyone always told me to chase my dreams

Now Emma Watson has a restraining order against me.

A Red Oscar Envelope walks into a bar and asks

am I Moonlighting or Emma Stoned?

You can explore emma rachel reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean emma marmalade dad jokes. There are also emma puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

It makes sense why Emma Watson is in both Beauty and the Beast and Harry Potter

Both of the main characters are harry

While watching Beauty and the Beast with my girlfriend, I got that very special feeling...

Where I knew I would do anything to bone Emma Watson.

Joey gives Mary 1 stuffed animal and 2 flowers.

Joey gives Mary 1 stuffed animal and 2 flowers. Emma gives Mary 3 flowers and 2 stuffed animals. Sam gives Mary 2 stuffed animals and 1 flower. What does Mary have?

Cancer. Mary has cancer.

My wife accused me of showing favouritism towards one of our kids...

It's not true; I love Emma and Not Emma equally!

I have a girlfriend..

Her name is Emma Gin Airy.

Emma joke, I have a girlfriend..

Emma's dilemma

Lady next door: What happened to your face?

Emma: My husband hit me.

Lady next door: Isn't he out of city?

Emma: I also thought so.

Hollywood is remaking Brokeback Mountain with Margot Robbie and Emma Watson

On the one hand, I hate that they have to remake all the classic movies with female leads as if that somehow makes them better. On the other hand, lotion.

Two blonde roommates

One day julia's new roommate emma was bathing with the door open.

julia: Why are you bathing with the door open?

emma: I didn't want your stupid boyfriend peeping through the keyhole that's why!

Joke my 9 year old daughter, Emma made up: What kind of list does Emma have a hard time with?


(She has ADHD)

What if Emma Watson gained some weight?

Emmanuel Macron meets Putin and tells him...

"You lack freedom in Russia. In Paris, anyone can walk in the street and shout 'Macron is an idiot!', and nobody will touch them."

Putin gives him a basilisk stare and slowly says:
"In Moscow, anyone can walk in the street and shout 'Macron is an idiot!', and nobody will touch them, either."

Why did Einstein married his cousin?

Because it was all relative!

PS: Inspired from a comment on TIL about Emma Noether!

I have a girlfriend named Emma

Emma Jination

My wife has just been diagnosed with breast cancer...

Doctor told us that mastectomy will be necessary.

Today, I went online to see if there is any alternative...

Emma, 28 years old, NY. Looks cute...

In Need of Some Very Urgent Pun Help

I need as many puns/jokes that involve the name Emma as possible. I realize this isn't exactly what this sub is for, but I am desperate.

After she was released from prison, Emma Goldman had to stay away from blueberries and prunes.

She was a free radical

Why didn't Emma go to South America for the summer?

She heard it was Chile!

If you think Emma Stone is something, look up her sister Rosetta.

Smoking hot, and a linguistic genius. Speaks 24 languages.

Why didn't Emma get her period?

She was in a coma

What is Emmanuel Macron's favorite item at Macdonald's?

French fries


My goal in life is to outlive my enemies. I'm looking at you Emma Morano, world's oldest person.

He saw your panties, Emma

Emma: Lita, Harris gave me 50$ for climbing that tree, again.

Lita: You idiot. That pervert saw your panties just like the other time.

Emma: I'd never let him do that. That's why I didn't wear any panties this time.

Emma was not like the other girls. She didn't know why all the others were crazy about Derek. She felt more intimate with Jessie and the cheerleaders than with another guys. She was reaching a moment in her life when she had to ask herself the question.

Emma gay

Two Italian men are having a lively talk on a bus...

"Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one last time."

A church lady behind them is crimson red and beside herself. "You two need Jesus! How dare you say such shameless filth? We don't talk about our sex lives in public in this country!"

"Hey, relaxa, missa! Who talkin' abouta sexa? I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella 'Mississippi'."

Did you hear what Emma Watson's new pronouns are?

(Her, My & He)

British teenager Emma Raducanu has just won $2.5m by winning the US open final

Sadly she needed 2 band-aids and a bandage for a cut on her leg in the last game, so she still owes about $25k

British woman in New York pummels a teenager into submission and is congratulated by Royalty

But enough about Ghislaine Maxwell, let us celebrate Emma Raducanu's achievments instead.

A couples happy married life almost went on the rocks because of the presence in the household of old Aunt Emma.

For seventeen long years she lived with them, always crotchety, always demanding.
Finally the old girl passed away.
On the way back from the cemetery, the husband confessed to his wife, "Darling, if I didn't love you so much, I don't think I would have put up with having your Aunt Emma in the house all those years."

His wife looked at him aghast... "My Aunt Emma?" she cried, "I thought she was your Aunt Emma!"

Trying to locate an old flame called Emma.

Last I know she moved abroad 6 years ago.

Surname: Grated

A woman is eavesdropping on two Italian men on the bus

"First Emma come first, the I come, then two asses come together, then I come again,then to asses come together again,then a-pee twice, then finally I come again"

The woman explodes "How can you be so rude, explaining your weird sexual experiences on a bus with children in it?"

The Italian man says: "relax I was just teaching my friend to spell Mississippi!"

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the emma jessie jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working emma mia piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes