The Best 15 Emily Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Emily jokes. There are some emily dani jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these emily dickinson puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Emily Jokes and Puns

Little Emily went home from school and told her mum that the boys kept asking her to do cartwheels because she's very good at them. Mum said, "You should say "No", they only want to look at your knickers."

Emily said, "I know they do. That's why I hide them in my bag"!

Funeral

Emily died last week after she fell in the lake.

It's a shame she never learned how to swim.

We brought a life preserver to her funeral.

It's what she would have wanted.

Miss Joan asks her 3rd grade students what their parents do for a living

Emily happily raises her hand and say : "Daddy's a mechanic and Mommy is a teacher like you !"

Jason then replies : "Well, my dad is a chef and my mom is her accountant"

And so on, every child answers to their best until it is little Billy's turn, who suddenly bursts into tears.

Miss Joan asks him why he's crying so much and Billy wails : "my papa is dead !"

"Oh, Billy, I'm so sorry... But what did he do before dying ?"

"Well, he was like *arglhblargahrgablar*"

Emily joke, Miss Joan asks her 3rd grade students what their parents do for a living

Teacher: children, what's your biggest fear?

Tom (5): snakes!

Emily (6): lions!

Stanley (5): the unbelievable senselessness of life, and that we will all die a terrible death in our nightmares!

Lilly (6): Stanley!

Bubba Calls 911

Emily Sue passed away and Bubba called 911. The 911 operator told Bubba that she would send someone out right away. 'Where do you live?' asked the operator.
Bubba replied, 'At the end of Eucalyptus Drive.'
The operator asked, 'Can you spell that for me?'
There was a long pause and finally Bubba said, 'How 'bout if I drag her over to Oak Street and you pick her up there?'


Superpowers....

Peter comes very drunk home late at night. He wakes his sleeping wife: Emily wake up! You know what just happened!?
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No , she replies sleepily.
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I went to the toilet and the light switched on all by itself. And when I went out of there, the light switched off again without me having to do anything. I think I'm getting super powers!
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Emily replies groans: Oh no, Peter! You pig, you just peed into the fridge again!!!

A teacher asks the class,"What do you do after school, kids?"

Anthony says "I buy weed from Yakobo"

Emily says "I buy booze from Yakobo"

Shaun says "I buy cocaine from Yakobo"

The teacher definitely didn't want to hear this type of responses, so she asks another random kid whom she didn't know that well.

"I complete my homework" he says.

Pleased, the teacher says "very good! What's your name, child?"

"I'm Yakobo"

Emily joke, A teacher asks the class,"What do you do after school, kids?"

Two women are standing on a bridge...

Emily and Katy are standing on a bridge when Emily says, "Have you ever wanted to pee over the bridge like guys do?"
And Katy says, "You know what, I think I will."
So she lifts her leg over the edge of the bridge and says, "Check it out, I'm gonna pee right down into that canoe."
Emily looks at the water and says, "That's not a canoe, that's your reflection."

Free Tickets to the US Open

My buddy gave me two tickets to the US Open but I realized I am getting married that day. If anyone wants to take my place, the wedding is at St. Paul's Church and her name is Emily

Charlotte Bronte wrote a horror novel

Jane Scare

Emily wrote one about aircraft turbulence

Wuthering Flights

(I do apologise for this)

My wife Emily and I have a celebrity exemption rule for extramarital affairs.

Evidently she thought it included the actor playing George in the local production of "Our Town."

You can explore emily crowe reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean emily quill dad jokes. There are also emily puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


I think I might be a homosexual

A list of girls in the order I dated them:
Haley
Emily
Lacy
Patrice
Megan
Elise
Irene
Maggy
Genevieve
Alice
Yolanda

Emily Blunt will star in a new crime movie where she hunts down hitmen who keep swallowing their targets and spitting out bigger versions of themselves.

It's titled Agario.

What do you call a woman that's too straight forward?

Emily Blunt

I am smart

I am smart but brokenhearted,
I tried to fart but instead I sharted.

- - Emily Dickinson, 1626

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the emily apostle jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working emily samantha piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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