Elves Jokes
57 elves jokes and hilarious elves puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about elves that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Laugh out loud with these funny wood elves, dwarves, and fairies jokes! Get your giggle on with these jokes perfect for the holiday season. Great for kids, teens, and adults alike. Read on for your elf jokes today!
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Funniest Elves Short Jokes
Short elves jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The elves humour may include short lobs jokes also.
- Why doesn't Santa have any millennial elves? Because there are already enough snowflakes at the North Pole.
- What do elves learn in preschool? Not the elf-abet, no; they don't learn anything because they don't exist.
- How do elves wash their hands? With Santa-tiser.
- I finally get why Santa's elves are small Most of our mass produced presents are made through child labor
- Why did Santa's elves spend a week living with 50 Cent? So they could improve their wrapping skills!
- Hey! You know, they've started offering free meditation retreats at the North Pole! Turns out the Christmas elves are really present minded.
- Prostitutes are like the Elves from Lord of the Rings When you know them well enough they tell you their true name
- It's weird how you see lots of elves and men in the LOTR trilogy, but Gimli is one of the only dwarves Guess you could say he's the Tolkien minority
- Santa's workers don't want to be called elves anymore They want to be called subordinate clauses
- 40 injured in local psychiatric hospital fire. Among them 17 men, 6 batmen, 4 dragons, 9 elves, 3 energy beings and 1 pokemon.
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Elves One Liners
Which elves one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with elves? I can suggest the ones about elite and apes.
- What is another name for Santa's elves? Subordinate Clauses!
- Some people say that elves are very shy But I think hobbits can be Shire
- What does Santa and his elves listen to in their Christmas workshop? WRAP MUSIC!
- What time do Elves usually meet? Around Twelvish
I'm ashamed to say that this is OC - How did Santa feel about getting a gift from his elves? He was presently surprised.
- Why does Santa use elves? the south lost
- What do elves learn in school? The elf-abet.
- What does Santa call his English Elves? Subordinate clauses.
... I'll see myself out. - What type of music does Santa's elves listen to while working? Rap music.
- How many elves does it take it screw in a lightbulb? Two, but they have to be very small.
- Where does Santa send the elves' wages? To the snow bank.
- What does Santa say to the elves after they make the toys? Leave my presents
- What do you call rich elves? Welfy
- What are the rockstar's favorite fantasy creatures? Elves.
- Did you hear how Santa died? His elves sleighed him.
Uproarious Elves Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What funny jokes about elves you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean elope jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make elves pranks.
Have you ever heard the story of how the angel got on top of the Christmas tree?
Once upon a time, three days before Christmas many years ago, Santa was sitting in his office. He was under a horrible amount of stress; the elves had just announced that they were forming a labour union, half the reindeer had hoof and mouth disease, and Mrs. Claus hadn't touched his candy cane in months. There he was, fuming with rage, when in walks The Angel, cheerful and bubbly as ever, and asks with a big smile,
"where should I put the Christmas tree, Santa?"
Santa was having a really bad day....
Everything was going wrong. The elves were looking for a raise, Rudolph was sick, Mrs Clause was in a foul mood. So the Angel arrived at the door dragging a Christmas tree he asked Santa, what will I do with the tree ?
And that is why you will always find an Angel sitting on top of the Christmas tree.
Which bounty hunter specializes in tracking elves?
Jingle Fett
Why are Elves the worst builders?
They follow too much elf and safety.
I wanted to learn to speak Elvish but I got the wrong book.
I can't speak like the Elves from Lord of the Rings but I can curl my lip and order a fried peanut butter and banana sandwich like a champ!
This year, Santa will have some competition.
One of Santa's little Elves has gone rogue and decided to start a rival gift distribution business.
He's a rebel without a Claus.
What do elves use for toothpaste?
OrnaMINT
just kidding its Colgate
Why are elves terrible at investing?
They only look at the present.
Do you ever think that santa is tired of being 'short' staffed?
He only ever hires elves...
I heard the elves at Santa's workshop hot box the workshop every Saturday and just let a 3d printer do all the work.
Though it's not surprising since the North Pole is already known as a chill place.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you know the Elves had a plan to beat the Uruk-hai with s**... Frustration?
It's true. They knew that if they got enough trees together, it made an OrcHard.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why is there no black santa.
He got fired for calling female elves hos.
What type of car do elves drive?
A toy-ota
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Doctor: we had to remove your appendix
**JRR Tolkien:** but that's where I explain why elves hate dwarves
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Where do elves like to go p**...?
The North Bowl
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do elves laugh when they run?
Because the snow tickles their b**....
The holidays are the most frightening time of the year for me.
I was a little dyslexic as a kid, and when I was a teen I started dabbling in the dark arts.
I think I sold my soul to Santa.
Every year when the jingle bells start ringing, I get nervous. It could be the elves coming for me.
Two elves are winding down in the North Pole bar after a long day of making toys.
After downing some shots of peppermint schnapps, the first elf says to the second, That COVID outbreak in China has really messed up the toy production schedule. I don't think Santa has ever pushed us so hard! .
The second one added, Yeah, things were so bad today that Rudolph and Blitzen were even called in to work on the assembly line.
The first one got an odd look on his face and said, Well, that explains why those Raisinets I found on the floor tasted so strange.
