The Best 57 Elf Jokes

Following is our collection of Elf jokes which are very funny. There are some elf fairies jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these elf orc puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Funny Elf Jokes and Puns

What's the rudest kind of elf? Nsfw

A go fuckyourself

A human, an elf and a dwarf walk into a bar...

The Hobbit laughs and walks under it.

What's the rudest type of Elf?

The GofuckyoursELF

The Hero: I'm on a quest to avenge the death of my Father!

The Paladin: You have my sword!

The Elf: And my bow!

The Dwarf: And my axe!

The Necromancer: And your father!

An Elf, a Dwarf, and a Hobbit walk into a bar...

All three proceed to eat, drink and have a good time, slamming down pint after pint of ale until finally the pub was closing. The bartender asks them how he should split the tab as it was a pretty hefty sum.

"I got this," replies the Elf as he looks at the bill. "My two friends here are always a little short anyway."

Why did the elf have to play with Mega Bloks?

Because he was Legoless

What sort of elf lives in a can?

A sprite

When is an elf not an elf?

When he's got his head up a fairy's skirt, then he's a goblin.

What do you call a workplace accident at the North Pole?

Shelf on the elf.

I like to imagine my fingers as the races of Middle Earth...

The thumb is the dwarf because it's stout

The pinkie is the hobbit because it's diminutive

The index is the elf because it's the most dexterous

The ring is the human because they were given the most rings

And the middle is the orc... because it's the rudest

What do you call an elf with a personal trainer?


You can explore elf sorceress reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean elf fairy dad jokes. There are also elf puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

A judge is hearing a murder trial.

Imp and her spirite-elf that was killed and the suspect, a 16 year old who's represented by his father, Ep.

After hearing the case, the judge decides.

Ep's teen didn't kill Imp's elf.

What's the best thing about working for Santa Claus?

Universal elf care.

You've heard of Elf on a Shelf, but have you heard...

Jeffrey Epstein definitely didn't kill himself.

Which elf was the best singer?

Elfis Presley

(I'll get my coat)

why was santa's little helper so depressed?

he had low elf esteem!

What do you get when you mix an elf and a scientologist?

Elrond Hubbard!

I think I'm ready to declare Elf of the year already:

Epstein didn't kill hims Elf.

An Elf, an Orc, and a Dragonborn walk into a bar...

There's no punchline, it's just a fantasy of mine.

This one's for the D&D players. A human, an elf and a dragonborn walk into a bar.

The gnome and halfling walk underneath perfectly fine.

Whats the Jewish version of Elf on a Shelf

Mensch on a bench

My great uncle Chuck started the elf on a shelf tradition.

Well, actually, he was a drunk on a bunk, but we toned it down for the kids.

Ice Bank Mice Elf

(repeat this 10 times fast)

Why was Santa forced to shut his grotto?

He was being investigated by the Elf and Safety Executive.

Only 341 days 'til Christmas!

What did Han Solo say to the Keebler elf who complained he couldn't understand Chewbacca?

Sorry friend, that's the way the Wookiee mumbles.

What do you call an Elf that sings?

A wrapper!

Merry Christmas.

I hope you got what you wished for. ( Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β°)

Who's Santa's rudest elf?

Gofuckyours elf.

The elf in the Fellowship of the Ring must not have had that great of a childhood.

Since there's no plastic in Middle Earth, he was lego-less

in india, muslim guy used to get divorce just bay saying the word 'talaq' 3 times. i found a joke based on it.

Wife: What I really hate about this house is the lack...

Husband: the lack....

Wife: the lack!

Husband: the lack?

Wife: yeah the lack of...

Husband: the lack o-

Wife: aye Dobby has no master. Dobby is a free elf

Husband: Damnnnnnn Fatima.

I saw a garden elf

On the subway today muttering to himself click.... click.... click.... click....

He was a metro gnome.

What do you call a selfish elf?


Why did Santa have to close his toy factory?

Elf and safety!

Here in about 50 years, when Harry Potter is on its 5th reboot, this time with an all house elf cast, the author will be

J. K. Rowling over in her grave.

How do you enslave a house elf?

By doing its laundry.

By taking into account this year's string of sexual accusations, I can say with confidence that... was nice knowing you Mr. Claus. But seriously, why that elf???

What do you call a singing elf

A wrapper

What does a diabetic elf need?


You have heard of elf on a shelf ? now we have.....

Pell in a cell

AG Sessions is a Keebler elf isolationist

and he is afraid weed is making cookies too mainstream

What do you call an elf that won't shut up?


How many elves does a german santa have?


Clown on the shelf

Works waaaay better than a stupid elf.

Why was Santa sacked two days before Christmas?

Elf and safety

The place I store my loud elf

Shhh elf

What did the dragon say to the elf?

What do you call an elf singer?

Elvish Presley

Eomer gets off of his horse and says, "What business does an elf, a man and a dwarf have in the Riddermark?"

A nearby horseman answers, "Ooh! Ooh! I know this one!"

What body regulates the welfare of Santa's workers?

The Elf and Saftey Executive.

What do you call an elf that got no toys for Christmas?


I never imagined saying my favorite Christmas movie would star Will Ferrell...

but it looks like Elf rose over.

What's the saddest kind of elf?


An original, courtesy of my 8 year old niece. If you are an elf in your 5th year at school, how old would you be?


Yeah, me either.

What is the first name of the most rude elf of all?


Is Eminem an elf?

Because he is a rap god.

How is Santa able to get his personal Christmas shopping done so quickly?

He gets it right off the elf.

What's the first thing an elf learns in school?

The elf-abet...

What do you call an Irish elf?

Dec O'ration

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the elf keebler jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working elf dwarf piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes