Electricity Bill Jokes
51 electricity bill jokes and hilarious electricity bill puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about electricity bill that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Electricity Bill Short Jokes
Short electricity bill jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The electricity bill humour may include short gas bill jokes also.
- When I was a little kid, I was afraid of the dark. But then I grew up and saw the electricity bill.
I'm now afraid of light. - [First Date] Her: I'm usually attracted to men with power. Me: That's great, I always pay my electric bill on time.
- I'm so much in debt, I can't afford to pay my electric bill... These are the darkest days of my life...
- In college, my roommates and I were so broke, we couldn't afford to pay the electricity bill. Those were the darkest days of our lives.
- My local Chinese restaurant has been hit with a £10k electricity bill. They said they can't turn off all the lights but they do dim sum.
- How many congressmen does it take to change a lightbulb? Doesn't really matter, they forgot to pass the electricity bill again.
- There's been a lot of scammers claiming they're from the electric company calling to get payments from overdue bills… They're getting pretty crafty- they even turned off my electricity.
- What did the alcoholic do after he couldn't afford the electric bill? He took a shot in the dark!
- How did the church save money on their electric bill? They switched to souler power from the son.
- All this Spending on Black Friday Better make sure ya'll pay the electric bill first or next Friday will be Black Friday too
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Electricity Bill One Liners
Which electricity bill one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with electricity bill? I can suggest the ones about water bill and electricity.
- Just opened my water bill and my electricity bill at the same time… I was shocked
- With great power comes great... electricity bills
- Why wasn't Bill Murray cast as Thor? Because nobody likes an electricity bill.
- Why do Hanzo players have such high electric bills? They never switch off.
- What's it called when Batman forgets to pay the electric bill? A dark night.
- I'm confused, because every game is pay to win You have to pay your electric bill.
- Do you know what a light year is? The unpaid electrical bill from last year.
- Why was Morrissey's electric bill so high? Because There Is a Light That Never Goes Out.
- What do you call it when an eclipse occurs? When God forgets to pay the electricity bill.
- And the Lord said, "Let there be light"... And my electricity bill said, "No."
- Chuck Norris has never received an electricity bill, he powers everything with his rage
- Ever wonder why people pay so much for their electricity bill? CON Edison.
Electricity Bill Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about electricity bill you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean medical bills jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make electricity bill pranks.
Mr. Wilson comes home one night, and his wife throws her arms around his neck. "I have great news. I’m a month overdue. I think we’re going to have a baby! The doctor gave me a test today, but until we find out for sure, we can’t tell anybody.”
The next day, Mrs. Wilson receives a telephone call from AEC (Atlanta Electric Company) because the electricity bill has not been paid.
“Am I speaking to Mrs. Wilson?”
“Yes. Speaking.”
AEC guy, “You’re a month overdue, you know!”
“How do YOU know?” stammers the young woman.
“Well, ma’am, it’s in our files!” says the AEC guy.
“What are you saying? It’s in your files. HOW?”
“Yes. We have a system of finding out who’s overdue.”
“GOD! This is too much.”
“Madam, I am sorry. I am following orders. I have to inform you are overdue.”
“I know that. Let me talk to my husband about this tonight. He will speak to your company tomorrow.”
That night, she tells her husband about the call, and he, mad as a bull, rushes to AEC office the next day morning.
“What’s going on? You have it on file that my wife is a month overdue? What business is that of yours?” the husband shouts.
“Just calm down,” says the lady at the reception at AEC, “It’s nothing serious. All you have to do is pay us.”
“PAY you? And if I refuse?”
“Well, in that case, sir, we’d have no option but to cut yours off.”
“And what would my wife do then?” the husband asks.
“I don’t know. I guess she’d have to use a candle.
A little old lady was walking down the street...
A little old lady was walking down the street, dragging two plastic garbage bags.
One bag had a hole in it and $20 bills were flying out of it.
A policeman stopped her and said, "Ma'am, you're losing a lot of bills from that bag."
"Darnd!" she said, "Thanks for the warning. I'll go back and pick them up."
"Hold on there! Where'd all that money come from? Did you steal it?"
"Oh, heavens no!" she said.
"My yard backs up to the stadium parking lot and, during tailgate parties, a lot of guys use my flower beds as bathrooms.
So I stand behind a bush with my electric hedge clipper and when one is in mid-stream, I fire up the trimmer and say: '$20 or off it comes!'"
"Wow. Good idea!" laughed the cop. "But what's in the other bag?"
"Well," said the little old lady, "not all of them pay up!"
World Cut Soccer
A little old Brazilian lady was walking down the street dragging two plastic garbage bags. One bag had a hole in it and $20 bills were flying out of it.
A policeman stopped her and said, "Ma'am, you're losing a lot of bills from that bag."
"Darnd!" she said, "Thanks for the warning. I'll go back and pick them up."
"Hold on there! Where'd all that money come from? Did you steal it?"
"Oh, no," she said. "My yard backs up on the stadium parking lot and, during tailgate parties, a lot of guys use my flower beds as bathrooms. So I stand behind a bush with my electric hedge clipper and when one is in mid-stream, I fire up the trimmer and say: '$20 or off it comes!'"
"Wow. Good idea!" laughed the cop. "But what's in the other bag?"
"Well," said the little old lady, "not all of them pay up!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Joke I thought of today.
How many b**... does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they didn't pay their electric bill.
Why do Mac users have such high electricity bills, but low gas bills?
They don't have windows.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My wife told me she can only have s**... with me in the dark because she can't stand the sight of me.
Since then I haven't been paying our electric bill.
My electricity bill was running suspiciously high
Had the power company send someone over. He found a wire tapped into my house running to a neighbor's. Watt do you know, a Joule thief lives next to my Ohm.
What does this post and my electricity bill have in common?
I'll be seeing it in three days whether I like it or not
I was sitting in my room just thinking about my life, when I started wondering how things got to be so dark.
Then I realized I forgot to pay the electric bill.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Fancy s**... Club
I found my self at a s**... club one evening. Apparently it was a nice one because when I pulled out a dollar bill to tip one of the dancers she promptly told me "sorry darling but we only take big bills here." without missing a beat I said "no problem hun, all I have are big bills." i winked at her, reached inside my coat pocket and stuffed my electric bill in her G-string.
My wife complained that my indoor garden raised the electricity bill too much.
As a compromise, I replace all the flower bulbs with LEDs
My wife asked if I had paid the Water and Electric bills.
Of course, I had forgotten to, but not wanting to lie or admit fault, I just told her that they were both current.
My wife divorced me, but she never told me why
She left me in the dark. Literally. She stopped paying the electricity bills
My dentist uses nitrous oxide to save on his electric bill
He doesn't need his drills to spin cause he just makes the whole room spin instead.
I saw my electricity bill today and it was huge!
So I checked if my microwave was running.
And wouldn't you know it?
It's been using the treadmill three hours a day everyday for the past month!
Some individuals understand the most complicated things in the universe...
I'm sitting here trying to figure out my electricity bill.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man once advised me to not waste electricity. "Using more power results in more electricity bills"
I told myself,
***Watt good advice***