JokoJokes

Eighty Jokes

33 eighty jokes and hilarious eighty puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about eighty that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Quick Jump To

Funniest Eighty Short Jokes

Short eighty jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The eighty humour may include short sixty jokes also.

  1. This pretty much sums up the eighties 80 + 81 + 82 + 83 + 84 + 85 + 86 + 87 + 88 + 89 = 845
  2. Everyone trying to get their bachelor's degree four years... and I'm over here waiting eighty years to graduate just so I can be on the front page.
  3. Joke #83 In an old joke, two noblemen vie to name the bigger number. The first, after ruminating for hours, triumphantly announces "Eighty-three!"
    The second, mightily impressed, replies "You win."
  4. Things are not working out with my math teacher girlfriend but she is really good at s**.... I don't know whether to eighty-six her or sixty-nine her.

Share These Eighty Jokes With Friends




Eighty One Liners

Which eighty one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with eighty? I can suggest the ones about seventy and ninety.

  1. Approximately eighty million Americans are obese. But those are just round figures.
  2. Eighty percent of married men cheat in America The rest cheat in Europe
  3. Old pirate What does an eighty year old pirate say?
    ArrrrMatey
  4. What is 50 cent known as in Zimbabwe? Eighty million dollars
  5. I don't know what an HD is.... ..but my doctor said I had eighty of them!
  6. What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? I'M EIGHTY!
    (Aye Matey!)
  7. I'd like to meet an eighty-year-old who's wise beyond his years.
  8. What do you call your eighty-bleven-year-old grandmother? NaN
  9. What did the blackbird say when he turned eighty? "Aye, matey!"
  10. What's the most ironic movie of the nineteen eighties? Ferrous Bueller's Day Off
  11. 80 year old pirate What does an say?
    Aye Matey!
    (I'm Eighty) dad joke explanation
  12. What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? I'm eighty.
  13. Why couldn't the driver pay attention to the road? Because his car had "Eighty-HP"
  14. The inventor of Mad libs died He was eighty p**... years old

Eighty joke, The inventor of Mad libs died

Howlingly Hilarious Eighty Jokes for an Unforgettable Evening

What funny jokes about eighty you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean turning 80 jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make eighty pranks.

So I was at my bank today.

There was a short line. There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady who was trying to exchange yuan for dollars. It was obvious she was a little irritated.
She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hundred dollar for yuan. Today I only get hundred eighty? Why it change?"
The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations.
The Asian lady says, "Fluck you white people too!"

I was at my bank today and there was just an Asian lady ahead of me

who was trying to exchange yen for dollars.
It was obvious she was a little irritated. She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla fo yen. Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?"
The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations."
The asian lady says, "Fluc you white people too!!"

I was at my bank today...

There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady who was trying to exchange money for dollars.
It was obvious she was a little irritated.
She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hundred dollars, today I only get hundred eighty? Why it change?"
The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations."
The Asian lady says, "Fluc you white people too"

Exchange rate

I had a bunch of Canadian dollars I needed to exchange, so I went to
the currency exchange window at the local bank. Just one lady in front of me...an Asian lady who was trying to exchange yen for dollars and she was a little irritated. She asked the teller, 'Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla fo yen. Today I get hunat eighty? Why it change?' The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, 'Fluctuations'. The Asian lady says, 'Fluc you white people, too'.

An 60 guy introduced his friend to his new trophy wife

When they alone without the wife they asked him : "how did you got such a hot wife? "
He said: " i lied about my age"
"did you tell her that you are fifty?" asked one of his friends
"no i told her i am eighty" replied the man

Interviewer: You said you are quick in mathematics, could you tell me what is a two hundred and fifty times eighty whole divided by sixty nine?

Man: Six thousand eight hundred and fourty five.
Interviewer: Hm... that's not the right answer...
Man: But i'm quick.

I was at my bank today waiting in a short line.

There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady, who was trying to exchange yen for dollars. It was obvious she was a little irritated. She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla of yen. Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?" The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations." The Asian lady says, "Fluc you white people too!"

I see your eight-year-old joke and raise you my nine-year-old joke.

Why didn't the bullet have a job?
It got fired.

Darkened Room

A young associate was romantically ambushed in a darkened room of the law firm. After months of the social isolation that comes from eighty hour work weeks, the associate was happy to reciprocate. However, when asked by a friend to identify the lover, the associate was puzzled. "All I know for sure is that it was a partner -- I had to do all the work."

An eighty year old man is in the hospital waiting room about to be a first time father.

The nurse comes out of the opperating room as say "Good news sir your wife just gave birth to twins. You have two healthy baby boys. "
The old man stands up excitedly takes off his hat and says to the nurse "It just goes to show you even if you have snow on the roof you can still have a fire in the furnace!"
The nurse replied: "Well you better change your filter because the babies are black"

What did the 80 year old pirate say?

Aye matey. Then the 82 year old pirate said, aye matey too. The 80yo pirate said, no you're not, you're eighty two! I'm eighty. Then the 82 year old pirate said, Aye matey! Then the 80yo pirate said, no you're not! You're eighty two! Then the 82 year old pirate said, Aye matey! Then the...

Eighty joke, Everyone trying to get their bachelor's degree four years...