Following is our collection of funny Egg jokes. There are some egg poach jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these egg omlette puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Since she can't even beat an egg
I'll let you know.
It's gonna take me a little while to get hard, I just got laid by this chick.
Concrete floors are really hard to crack.
Then he said "you were thinking about the egg weren't you!"
The bartender says " Sorry, we don't serve breakfast here".
Breed a man that can lay an egg and suddenly you're taking science too far.
The answer is the chicken.
It might take me a minute to get hard, I just got laid this morning.
The chicken
Apparently the answer is Chicken.
Years ago, my older friend told me a joke that I have never heard from anyone else to this day. The joke itself is brilliantly stupid.
"What did the egg say to the pot of boiling water?"
"It's going to take a moment for me to get hard; I just got laid by some chick."
You can explore egg egged reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean egg eggcellent dad jokes. There are also egg puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
A life long question was answered. It was the chicken
Higher than you would think, the structural integrity of a well laid concrete floor renders it virtually indestructible towards an incoming egg, even at terminal velocity.
Because in France one egg is un oeuf.
"Sorry, it's going to take me a while to get hard, I got laid last night."
An egg gets laid
and I met a girl who was dressed as an egg. One thing led to another and a lifelong question was answered; it was the chicken.
A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken lights up a cigarette. The egg, with a dissatisfied look on it's face, rolls over and remarks, "Well, I guess we answered that question."
By dropping it seven feet - it won't break for the first six.
Because one egg is un oeuf.
A long tamago
A hatchet
I want to see which one comes first.
Because in France, one egg is un oeuf.
Anyway you want. Concrete doesn't break easily.
"Not sure I can get hard..just got laid 10 minutes ago"
Because one egg is un oeuf.
The ova achiever
Because one egg is un oeuf.
and I hooked up with a guy dressed as a chicken.
I guess we have an answer to that age old question.
It was the chicken.
One egg a month
\-Darling, I'm sorry, but I went to your office and found 5 eggs and 5.000 euros , what's the deal with it?
\-Well, how can I explain it... Since the beginning of our marriage, I would store one egg for each time you annoyed me.
\-Oh, that's so sweet! And what the 5.000 euros are for?
\-I usually wait when I have a dozen of eggs before selling then.
What do you call an egg that's scared?
A chicken egg.
A man walks into a grocery store and grabs a shopping cart. He grabs one egg, one tomato, one head of lettuce, one steak, one banana, one apple, and one of everything else in the store.
He walks up to the counter and starts putting his items on the belt. After the cashier gives him a weird look, she says, "You must be single."
He says, "I am. How did you know?"
She says, "Because you're extremely ugly."
Its going to take me a while to get hard because I was just laid.
With just a piece of sausage and an egg, they can fill a woman's tummy for 9 months.
Because sex cells.
The Rooster. ( อกยฐ อส อกยฐ)
so I said to him, 'Which is your favourite Christian festival?'
He replied 'Have to love Easter, baby.'
Because in France one egg is un ลuf.
you know the egg gets laid at least once
When the chicken sits up, lights a cigar and says " Well I guess that answers that question."
Because the egg cracked a yolk.
Egg says in a angry huff "I guess we answered THAT question!"
You only get laid once and the only woman to sit on your face is your mother.
I'll let you know...
Went to a party dressed as a chicken last night, and got with a girl who was dressed as an egg - a life long question was answered. It was the chicken.
She was standing in the kitchen, preparing our usual soft-boiled eggs and toast for breakfast, wearing only The 'T' shirt that she normally slept in.ย
As I walked in, almost awake, she turned to me and said softly, "You've got to make love to me this very moment! ย
My eyes lit up and I thought, "I am either still dreaming or this is going to be my lucky day! ย
Not wanting to lose the moment, I embraced her and then gave it my all; right there on the kitchen table.ย
Afterwards she said, "Thanks," and returned to the stove, her T-shirt still around her neck.ย
Happy, but a little puzzled, I asked, "What was that all about?"ย
She explained, "The egg timer's broken."
omelette you think about it...
And the world's largest woman is laid by your dad.
I just ordered a chicken and an egg. We shall see what one comes first.
Sorry I can't get hard right now. I just got laid.
Because one egg is un oeuf.
A Zy-Goat
I'll escort myself out.
The chicken slowly puffs on a cigarette as he radiates satisfaction. The frustrated egg turns to him and barks, "Well I guess that answers that question."
Because the Romans feel that when it comes to eggs, you can't have too many ovum.
But in France, they believe that one egg is un ouef.
You can beat your meat and beat an egg, but you sure cant beat a blow job
A: Any way you want, concrete floors tend to be very hard to crack.
I went out last night dressed as a chicken and ended up getting with a girl who was dressed as an egg. A lifelong question has been answered; it was the chicken.
... and chubby Chuck has been chomping on Easter eggs all night. He decides that he simply can't eat one more Easter egg. So he plays a prank. He goes into the chicken coop and replaces every single egg the hens have laid with a brightly colored one. A few minutes later, the rooster walks in, sees all the colored eggs, then storms outside and kills the peacock.
You only get laid once and it's by your mum.
Because one egg is an ลuf.
They won't stop to ask for directions.
It may take me a while to get hard. I just got laid by a chick.
Because one is un ลuf.
Don't expect me to get hard in three minutes, I just got laid this morning!
Because one egg is un oeuf.
An egg walks into a bar, along with pancakes, and bacon. The bartender looks up and alertly says.
"Sorry guys, we don't serve breakfast"
I don't know if I can get hard I just got laid this morning!
The egg says to herself, "I guess we answered that question."
Because one egg, is an oeuf.
You get laid once, and it's by your mom.
The first sperm says, are we almost there? I don't know how much longer I can do this!
The second sperm responds, keep going buddy, you can do it. We just passed the tonsils!
I'll let you know.
You only get laid once, it takes three minutes to get hard, and you come in a box with eleven others.
The second egg says "beats me".
It has been months since I was laid too.
A boiled egg is hard to beat.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the egg lette jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working egg yolkswagen piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.