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Edges Jokes

43 edges jokes and hilarious edges puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about edges that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Find out why people with no hair edges joke that they don't have a diameter — and why the Artic and Himalayas have nothing to do with it. Get ready to laugh with these funny jokes about hair edges.

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Funniest Edges Short Jokes

Short edges jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The edges humour may include short ides jokes also.

  1. I debated a flat earther once he stormed off saying he'd walk to the edge of the earth to prove me wrong.
    He'll come around, eventually.
  2. Why is it best to teach physics on the edge of a cliff? (Original joke) Because that's where students have the most potential.
  3. I just got kicked out of flat earth Facebook groups because I asked if the 6 foot social distancing had pushed anyone over the edge yet.
  4. Why is it best to teach physics on the edge of a cliff? It's where the students have the most potential.
  5. Flat earthers are very worried about the COVID-19 pandemic. They are afraid that social distancing measures may push people over the edge.
  6. I was clinging for dear life on the edge of the cliff... As the rescue team approached, one of the guys shouted, "Whatever you do, don't look down!"
    So I started smiling...
  7. I debated a flat earther once. He got so mad he stormed off saying he would walk to the edge of the earth to prove me wrong. He'll come around eventually.
  8. I had a debate with a flat earther. He said he'll walk to the edge of the earth to prove me wrong. I'm sure he'll come around.
  9. I was sitting on the edge of the bed, pulling my boxers off when... ...my wife said, "You spoil those dogs."
  10. Flat Earthers It's funny making a flat earth beliver angry, but if you push them over the edge then you're only proving them right.

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Edges One Liners

Which edges one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with edges? I can suggest the ones about cuts and tees.

  1. If the earth really is flat Wouldn't cats have pushed everything off the edge by now?
  2. My ex updated her status on Facebook to standing on the edge of a cliff. So I poked her
  3. Your mama is so fat….. On one edge of her passport photo, it says continued on next page.
  4. Bono and The Edge walk into a bar The bartender sighs ugh, not you two again…
  5. I love relaxing with some sand paper It's just a little something to take the edge off
  6. What do you call a robotic emo that likes dark humor. Cutting edge technology
  7. Bono and the Edge walk into a bar. Bartender says, "Ugh, U2 again?"
  8. Microsoft Edge is a big improvement over IE... It downloads Chrome twice as fast!
  9. Earth can not be flat Because if it was cats would have pushed everything from the edge
  10. Apple is releasing a new product called the iKnife. It's cutting edge technology.
  11. Knives are extremely advanced They are all cutting edge technology
  12. I've started blunting knives to help myself relax. Really takes the edge off.
  13. I hate the new Windows 10 update. It puts me on Edge.
  14. What's the difference between a walnut and a chestnut? How long you edged.
  15. What do you call an innovation in scissors? Cutting-edge technology

No Edges Jokes

Here is a list of funny no edges jokes and even better no edges puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • A buddy of mine is one of those flat Earther's. He said he's angry and going to the edge. I have a feeling he'll come around.
  • If there was a reality show about flat-earthers trying to find the edge of the world The ending would be a cliffhanger.
  • Flat earthers are very worried about the pandemic. They are afraid that social distancing measures may push people over the edge.
  • The Covid19 situation has been especially stressful for the Flat Earth Society. They fear that the social distancing measures could push people over the edge.
  • I just got kicked out of Flat Earth Facebook group. I just got kicked out of Flat Earth Facebook group because I asked if the 6 foot social distancing guideline has pushed anyone over the edge yet.
  • My friend was so convinced of flat earth, he said he was going to Antartica to find the edge. He came around eventually.
  • What is the best proof we have that the world is not flat? If it were, cats would have knocked everything off the edge by now.
  • I get anxious whenever I have to use the default Microsoft web browser Using Firefox helps take the *Edge* off.
  • I just got kicked out of a Flat Earth Facebook group.... .... because I asked if the 1.5m social distancing had pushed anyone over the edge yet.
  • Why do accordion players always play on the edge of the stage? So they can be closer to their cars when the gig is over.
Edges joke

Playful Edges Jokes to Add Joy and Laughter to Your Group

What funny jokes about edges you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean faces jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make edges pranks.

Wife texts husband on a cold winter morning: "Windows frozen, won't open."

Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and then gently tap edges with hammer."
Wife texts back 10 minutes later: "Computer really messed up now."

So this piece of rope walks into a bar...

...and he tries to order a drink, the bartender says, "We don't serve your kind roun' here!" The piece of rope walks outside, ties himself in half a couple times, rubs himself in the dirt and drags his edges. He walks back into the bar and orders a drink. The bartender says, "Hey! Ain't you that same piece of rope?!" The piece of rope says, "Nope, I'm a frayed knot!"

My wife texted me at lunch

"Window's frozen"
"Pour warm water on it, then lightly tap the edges with a hammer and chisel" I replied.
Ten minutes later, she called back.
"We need a new computer now".

I have a phobia of edges

I'm going to start cutting corners to avoid them

My wife texted me on a cold winter morning...

My wife texted me on a cold winter morning, saying "Windows frozen, won't open. "
I texted her back, "gently pour some hot water along the edges, and tap it with a hammer. "
After a few minutes she texted back, "computer is really messed up now. "

A circle went to a party uninvited

"This party is only for shapes with edges. You cannot be here.", said the triangle.
The circle replied, sipping his drink, "I know. That's just how I roll."

I was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer's and Cancer

The cancer s**..., but at least I don't have Alzheimer's!
Wait
No
I do
I can feel the edges of my mind unraveling; each piece, once so firmly put together, slowly falling away from my grasp. To know that the mind, the seat of who you are, can simply... disintegrate, like a mighty sandcastle in the tide...
Well, at least I don't have cancer.

What is the difference between a piece of fabric with elastic around the edges, designed to go on a bed, and an unexpected bout of diarrhea when wearing sandals?

One is a fitted sheet...

I like my women like I like my sliced meat...

Artificial with a bit if fat around the edges.

The other day, my wife asked me if I could help her with a puzzle. She couldn't find any edges to start with and the colors all resembled each other.

After taking a look at the puzzle, I told her to put the corn flakes back in the box

How does the worker of the curved edges factory feel about his job?

Pointless.

I feel bad for the people that mow the edges of golf courses.

They have a rough job.

Your mother is like the Atlantic Seaboard.

Huge, rough around the edges, and everyone has 24/7 access to her.

So I found a great new barber practiced In the art of wet shaving.

His name is Sweeney Todd he is a little rough with the edges but you sure can't beat his cut-t**... prices.

Why did the sXe kid get kicked out of the drum circle?

Because a circle has no straight edges.

The circle of life is a square with three edges ...

Love and empathy ....

"He who lives by the sword , dies by the sword.", said Jesus.

That's why I use a hammer, it can't possibly be mistaken for a sword. It doesn't even have any sharp edges!

Kayne West was originally going to sing John Legend's recent hit song

But they gave it to John Legend after Kayne changed the chorus to: "Cause all of me, loves all of me. Love my curves and all my edges. All my perfect perfections"

Edges joke, Kayne West was originally going to sing John Legend's recent hit song