Eclipse Jokes

• Short Eclipse Jokes
• Eclipse One Liners
• Solar Eclipse Jokes
• Moon Eclipse Jokes
• Lunar Eclipse Jokes
• More Eclipse Jokes

Funniest Eclipse Short Jokes

Short eclipse jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The eclipse humour may include short twilight jokes also.

1. This past week I made a couple bucks selling fake eclipse glasses I'm not to worried though, those suckers will never see me again.
2. I'm taking my wife for skydiving. So if you see a solar eclipse today, don't be surprised.
3. The eclipse did two things our political leaders cannot. It slowed global warming and gave us all something to look up to
4. If I had a dollar for every time someone said not to look directly at the eclipse... I'd have enough money to pay for the eye surgery I need now!
5. Someone told me you can watch a solar eclipse through a colander I tried but just ended up straining my eyes.
6. Thankfully, someone created an online resource for everyone who suffered retinal damage watching the solar eclipse. It truly is a site for sore eyes.
7. Know your eclipses. Earth between sun and moon: Lunar eclipse.
   Moon between sun and Earth: Solar eclipse.
   Sun between moon and Earth: Apoceclypse.
8. Total Eclipse Today I tried using a colander to view the eclipse.
   I think I've strained my eyes.
9. Fun fact: 99% of voters who live in the "path of totality" for the upcoming solar eclipse voted for trump. Which is ironic, because the *last* thing they wanted to do is make the country darker.
10. They shouldn't let students outside to see the eclipse today They need to protect their pupils.

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Eclipse One Liners

Which eclipse one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with eclipse? I can suggest the ones about sunset and moon phase.

1. Dad can you explain to me what a solar eclipse is No sun
2. What kind of eclipse is it when the sun moves in front of the moon? An Apocaclipse.
3. How does the man in the moon cut his hair? (From my 9yo child) Eclipse it.
4. How does the man on the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.
5. You can use a colander to look at the eclipse But be careful you don't strain your eyes
6. Hey dad, can you tell me what happens during a solar eclipse? Dad: No son.
7. I couldn't see the eclipse of the sun today! 😡 Friggin' moon was in the way! 😡
8. How does the sun cut his hair? Eclipse it.
9. Why do planets never get invited to summer soirées? They always try to eclipse the fun.
10. RIP to all the vampires who got fooled by the solar eclipse.
11. Why can't Java programmers see well? Because of the eclipse
12. How does an astronaut cut his hair? Eclipse it.
13. How does the moon get a haircut? Eclipse it
14. My son asked, dad, can you tell what a solar eclipse is? I said, no son .
15. My neighbor tried to charge me $20 to watch the eclipse from his balcony Daylight robbery

Solar Eclipse Jokes

Here is a list of funny solar eclipse jokes and even better solar eclipse puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• A boy asks his father what is the meaning of the Solar Eclipse? The father replies "No son"
• What do you call a deaf woman during a solar eclipse. Whatever you want to. It's not like she's going to know.
• Eclipse is an acronym * Eyes
  * Cannot
  * Look
  * Into
  * Partial
  * Solar
  * Eclipse
• A solar eclipse is like watching a woman breastfeed in public It's beautiful, it's free, but under no circumstances should you look at it.
• A solar eclipse is like a woman breastfeeding It's beautiful, it's natural, it should be celebrated, but that still doesn't mean you should stare at it
• What did the buffalo say during the solar eclipse? Bison...
• Is it a solar or lunar eclipse where the sun passes in front of the moon? Neither. That would be the apoca-clipse.
• I asked my dad, "could you tell me what a solar eclipse is?" He said, "no sun".
• Son: Dad, can you explain to me what a solar eclipse is? Dad: No, son
• Dad, "can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?" No sun.

Moon Eclipse Jokes

Here is a list of funny moon eclipse jokes and even better moon eclipse puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What does the moon do when it needs a haircut? Eclipse it.
  Sorry, my son was studying science and saw this joke. He wanted me to share it. Apparently upping his dad joke skills early.
• How would a man on the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.
• How does the moon cut its hair? Eclipse it.
• What does the barber do to the moon's hair? Eclipse it.
• Eclipse is when earth is between sun and moon, what is it called when sun is between earth and moon ? Apocalypse
  P.S . My 11 yr old nephew said this and I found it very funny
• What does the man on the moon do when he needs a haircut? Eclipse it.
• What does the man on the moon do if his hair is to long? Eclipse it.
• How does the moon shave? Eclipse it.
  (He clips it)
• Topical Humor How does the moon get his hair cut? Eclipse it.
• I saw a double eclipse today. Not only did the moon block out the sun, but the clouds did as well.
  :(

Lunar Eclipse Jokes

Here is a list of funny lunar eclipse jokes and even better lunar eclipse puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What does the lunar eclipse have in common with the baboon? They both display a red moon.
• A lunar eclipse is when the earth is between the earth and moon. A solar eclipse is when the moon is between the earth and the sun Apocalypse is when the sun is between the earth and the moon
• Did you guys see the lunar eclipse the other night? I missed it, the earth was in the way.
• Did anybody else see the lunar eclipse tonight? I looked, but I couldn't see it.
• Decided to watch the lunar eclipse tonight... Couldn't see the moon
• Did anyone see the lunar eclipse tonight? It was right by 'your a**...'.

Ridiculous Eclipse Jokes to Spark Fun and Laughter

What funny jokes about eclipse you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean zodiac jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make eclipse pranks.