Earning Jokes
36 earning jokes and hilarious earning puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about earning that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Earning Short Jokes
Short earning jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The earning humour may include short earned jokes also.
- If I had a penny for every time someone called me sexist... I'd probably be earning more than the average woman.
- What is the difference between a guitar player and a savings bond? The savings bond will eventually mature and earn money.
- Wonder Woman earned $300 million worldwide in first week. "Wonder Man" earned $400 million for doing the same job.
- Bernie Sanders is a true socialist He's taking the delegates he's earned and giving them to somebody who is struggling to earn their own.
- I heard women in this country only get 78¢ for every dollar a man earns... On the bright side, we get to keep 22¢
- I'm a good man. I give about 50% of my earnings to Charity. Except for when she's not working…Then I give it to Destiny.
- America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole day.
- What do you call a Mongol leader who swindles people out of their hard earned cash? Ghengis Khan Man.
- My dad rewards me when I earn a good report card, but any C s are punished with unbearable dad-jokes. He likes to call it the carrot and schtick method of parenting.
- After being sent to prison, I quickly earned the nickname "Mitochondria." I was the powerhouse of the cell.
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Earning One Liners
Which earning one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with earning? I can suggest the ones about income and profit.
- What's the fastest way to earn money as a photographer? By selling your camera.
- I like to give a percentage of my earnings to Charity.... ......and other strippers.
- I like making money It's a lot easier than earning it.
- What's the quickest way to earn karma using your sword-fighting abilities? Riposte
- Women always call me ugly until they find out what I earn. Then they call me poor.
- Why is it easy to talk to people who earn little pay? Because they make cents!
- How does a fencer earn their karma? Ripostes.
- How do you earn a small fortune by gambling? You start with a big fortune.
- What did Dr. pepper earn his PhD in? Fizz-ics
- What do you call a can that earns a degree? A graduated cylinder.
- This one simple trick will earn you THOUSANDS in WEEKS! Get a job.
- How much money does a gay pornstar earn? A buttload
- Who earns a living driving their customers away? A taxi driver
- A penny saved... ... is 350 Trillion Zimbabwe dollars earned!
- What's the most honest way to earn a living as a seamstress? The Ernest Hemingway

Experience Good Cheer with Hilarious Earning Jokes and Friends
What funny jokes about earning you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean reward jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make earning pranks.
A teenager, who just turned 18, desperately wants a car.
His mother tells him to buy one himself. A chemistry student himself, he finds an effective money-making strategy. Every day, he would sell mixtures of Rhenium, Phosphorus, Osmium, and Tennessine, and he was earning a lot from the sales. Curious, his mother asks him about the mixtures.
The teen replied: RePOsTs are the fastest way to car, Ma.
I quit my career as a professional poker player, and I decided to open a grocery store.
For the first couple weeks, I didn't earn much money. Then, I decided to rearrange the meat and the snacks in my store. I started earning lots of money. I knew that I would succeed when the chips were down and the steaks were high.
Son asks his father for a gift
Son: - Dad I need a gift for my birthday
Dad: - What do you want Son
Son: - I need a Bitcoin
Dad: - What?? Why do you need $ 35K for?? You know how difficult it is to earn $ 25K dollars?? You will learn difficulty of earning $ 40K when you get a job
I am earning 5,000 monthly
Last month I received 7,000 and I kept quiet.
This month I got 3,000 so I went to HR to complain.
HR asked "why didn't you complain when you received extra last month?"
I replied "I will normally forgive the first mistake, but I can't tolerate the second."
Physics Teacher's Story
Speed and Velocity are brothers.
Velocity went to college and got a science degree with which he's earning a six figure salary.
Speed dropped out and still lives with his parents in their basement.
Speed lacks Direction.
When I was young, losing teeth would earn me money.
Now I'm old, earning money will gain me teeth.
Seems my girlfriend's moonlighting as a parts model
I overheard her on the phone to her friend, boasting about how much she was earning doing hand and foot jobs.
I've just accidentally let slip to the family that I lied about earning my biology degree.
Me and my big face-hole thingy.
Educated Sons
1st son : Degree in Economics.
2nd son: MBA.
3rd son : PhD
4th son : Thief
Neighbour: Why can't you throw the
4th son out of your house?
Father : He is the only one earning money. The rest are unemployed.
How do you make a small fortune after earning a degree in political science?
Start with a large fortune and know when to stop.
Why does Subway call its employees Sandwich Artists?
So you can finally say you are earning money as an artist.
If you're mad about people receiving forgiveness, without earning it
I have some terrible news about Jesus
Teacher asked lil Steve:
-What do you wanna do when you grow up?
-I dream of earning millions and millions of dollars, just like my dad!
-Your father earns that much money?!?
-No, he just dreams about it every day.
Elon Musk said he wants to take "hundreds of people to Mars"
Earning him the title of "World's most creative serial killer"
At an interview: In the beginning, you'll be earning 20 000, later on it can go up to 40 000.
OK, I'll come again later then.
So I am already busy earning my second million.
Because earning the first million failed
Started high school with straight As. Ended it with a boyfriend.
I went from earning As to getting Ds.
A female coworker told me that men will never know how labor feels...
I said, Well, women will never know how earning equal wage will feel.
What do you call a capitalist Bernie Sanders?
Earning Sanders.
