The Best 5 Early Retirement Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Early Retirement jokes. There are some early retirement jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these early retirement puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Early Retirement Jokes and Puns

Happy Birthday Henry

Old widower Henry is celebrating his 80th birthday in the retirement home, and his friends decide to hire a hooker to entertain him. So early that evening, a beautiful blond shows up at his door, and says "HI, I'm Susie, and I'm here to give you super sex."

Henry looks her over, thinks for a minute, and says "Eh, I'll take the soup."

Help! I need activity suggestions. I'm going to hang out with my father, first thing tomorrow morning. He's a retired Naval officer and an alcoholic.

What do you do with a drunken sailor, early in the morning??

Why do Pirates always end up retiring early?

Because from a young age they were taught to contribute to theirΒ  ARRRR-ARRRR-SP

Have you heard about the baker who invested wisely and got to retire early?

He no longer kneaded the dough!

What's the best benefit of working for ISIS?

early retirement


Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the early retirement jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working early retirement piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes