The Best 18 Dumb Man Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Dumb Man jokes. There are some dumb man jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these dumb man puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Dumb Man Jokes and Puns

A man asks god...

Man:"Why did you make women so beautiful?"
God:"So you would love her."
Man:"Then why did you make her so dumb?"
God:"So she would love you."

A man is walking his pet carrot

As he's walking his pet carrot it gets hit by a car. After rushing to the ER the man paces the waiting room as the doctor comes out exhausted from surgery. Doctor, is my carrot alive are they ok? The doctors sighs. I have good news and bad news. The good news is your pet carrot is alive the man breathes a sigh of relief. What's the bad news doctor? The doctor looks him in the eyes and says Well I'm sorry but, your carrots gonna be a vegetable for the rest of its life.

I know it's dumb it was just of favorite of my grandfathers a long time ago and I thought I'd share it.

A Polish joke

A Polish man named Wojciech was fed up with being called a dumb Polack by every one he met. So one day he decided to pretend to be German. Wearing Liederhosen, knee socks and a feathered cap, he walked into a shop and told the man behind the counter:

"Hello my name is Rolf and I would like to buy some schnitzel, some saurbraten, some pretzels and some beer."

The counterman said "Get outta here you dumb Polack!".

Wojciech cried, "No no no! I am German! Don't you see my Liederhosen? Why do you think I am Polish?"

The counterman says "This is a hardware store."

A man asks god some questions.

A man asks, God, why did you make woman so beautiful? God responds, So you would love her. The man asks, But God, why did you make her so dumb? God replies, So she would love you.

A blind man walks into a bar...

...and after managing to find himself an empty seat at the bar he orders a pint.

Bartender fills the pint and as it is being placed in front of the blind man says, "hey Bartender, wanna hear a dumb blonde girl joke?"

Bar goes silent.

"Hey man," the Bartender says, "you're blind so there is a few things you should know before you tell your joke. You are in a dike bar, the only one in town actually, and many of us are blonde. I am blonde. Sid the biker chick next to you is blonde and so is her girlfriend. The bouncer is also blonde along with the 2 chicks behind you playing pool. Do you really want to tell that joke?"

"Nah, you're right." says the blind man, "I would have to explain it too many times."


Today a woman called me "the most sexist man she'd ever met"

When will these dumb broads understand that "sexiest" is spelled with two E's and not one?

A man goes in for hernia surgery

After the operation, the doctor meets him in the recovery room.

"Sir, the operation was successful but I have bad news. We accidentally removed your testicles during the surgery."

The man was immediately furious.

"You bastards! You dumb idiots! I'll kill you for this!"

The surgeon calmly replies "Now sir, you don't have the balls."

What did the shirt say to the pants?

What up britches!





(At a photography studio today, taking an extended family picture with like 15 people there. This is what the photographer said to get us to smile. I couldn't stop laughing, and was beet red. We had to wait for me to calm down. I'm a middle age married man with teenage kids , it was great fun seeing my girls roll their eyes at dad, that couldn't stop laughing at a dumb joke.)

A man, his wife and the hotel receptionist

Man: Hello, I'am in room 420. Please send someone over immidiately. I'am having an argumemt with me wife and she wants to jump from the window.

Receptionist: Iam sorry sir but thats personal matter.

Man: Listen you dumb f*ck, the window is not opening and that's a maintenance problem!

An American customs agent and an Canadian customs agent are having a beer after a long week.

The Canadian says "Man, you wouldn't believe this dumb American redneck trying to cross the border. I ask him 'Do you have any weapons, son?' and the kid says "Sure, whatcha need?'"

The American scoffs. "I got you beat. About three weeks ago, this dumb Canadian punk comes down. I ask him 'Are you carrying any fruits or vegetables?' The kid thinks for a second and says 'Is marijuana a vegetable?'"

Dumb Joke

How do you describe a man who's super confident in his genitalia?
Ego-testicle.

You can explore dumb man reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean dumb man dad jokes. There are also dumb man puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


The dumb geologist had a gold ore in his backyard

Poor man took it for granite

A man walks into a bar for illiterate people. The bartender says, "Don't you hate it when people tell jokes that have specific details about situations that would never happen in real life, just so they can make some dumb pun?" The man, nodding, replies,

"I no write."

A rich, dumb Husband and wife are taking their first trip on their new Yacht.

They have sailed far from the shore, and the two are sitting in chairs, looking out towards the water.

"Gee, I just love this new Yakt!" The man says.

"Erm... Honey, the "c" is silent." His wife responds.

The man takes a sip from a tall glass, before responding "you're right, it's very tranquil."

Honesty Is Not Always the Best Policy (real news)

A Florida man arrested for speeding and DUI admitted to police that prior to getting in his car he'd been drinking beer and watching "The Fast & the Furious." Although, he admitted his favorite movie is "Dumb and Dumber."

You remind me of someone I once knew

Man, I loved that dumb ol' horse.

Joke about something dumb

Did you know that a man back in the 1600's designed and developed a jetpack?

If you didn't know, I wouldn't blame you. It didn't really take off

Man and Women in Diffrent Combinations

Smart man + smart woman = romance

Smart man + dumb woman = affair

Dumb man + smart woman = marriage

Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the dumb man jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working dumb man piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes