Dumb Dad Jokes
18 dumb dad jokes and hilarious dumb dad puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about dumb dad that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Dumb Dad Short Jokes
Short dumb dad jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The dumb dad humour may include short bad dad jokes also.
- My dads favorite dumb joke Astronauts land on a planet inhabited by beautiful women who are10 feet tall. They approach the women and say "take me to your ladder, ill see your leader later"
- Did you here about the support group for dads who make dumb jokes around their families? Yeah, it's "fo' pas".
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Dumb Dad One Liners
Which dumb dad one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with dumb dad? I can suggest the ones about embarrassing dad and dumb husband.
- My father says I'm dumb but I know... Dad jokes
- What do you get when you combine Mum and Dad? Dum(b) and Mad.
- My dad accidentally ordered the wrong paving materials Now That's his own dumb asphalt.
- Your dad is so dumb... that he forgot to use a c**...
-sorry
Hilarious Dumb Dad Jokes that Bring Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about dumb dad you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean dead dad jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make dumb dad pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A father and a son are sitting at the table.
The father says: "Son, you are dumb as this table right here.", and knocks on it twice.
The son replies: "Dad, there's someone at the door!"
-"Sit down, I'll get it."
What did the shirt say to the pants?
What up britches!
(At a photography studio today, taking an extended family picture with like 15 people there. This is what the photographer said to get us to smile. I couldn't stop laughing, and was beet red. We had to wait for me to calm down. I'm a middle age married man with teenage kids , it was great fun seeing my girls roll their eyes at dad, that couldn't stop laughing at a dumb joke.)
A dumb one, ever for already low dad-joke expectations...
True story (makes this even more pathetic) that happened last night:
Wife: The fan is too high
Me: It's like that so we don't bump our heads
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How do pirates know they're pirates?
They think, therefore they AAAARRR.
My dad just told me that and I laughed. So dumb but it's Talk Like A Pirate Day.
A son tells his dad,
"Dad! There's a mockingbird on the roof."
"How do you know it's a mockingbird?" The Dad asks.
The son responds, "Because it said 'Look at me I'm a dumb 40 year old living in my parents basement'"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Bud asks his dad: Why do my 3 brothers have family names while my name is Bud ?
Dad replies: Cause son, the first time I saw you, I told your mom: He's gonna be Big, Ugly, & Dumb!
My wife asked: You're pretty proud of your self for that one aren't you? With only a slight smirk on her face.
So we were out to eat with the kids. My son, Ronin, is 1 yrs old and was kinda sick; coughing. We ordered some beers and she got a Chocolate Coffee stout. My son is hacking up a lung and I say to my wife: "Your beer is a lot like Ronin right now". She said "How's that?" I said, "They are both a little coughy.
Maybe this is a dumb Dad joke but if you guys liked it then I can show this post to her to back me up. I was admittedly too proud of this one but lets see what you guys think. Preparing for onslaught in 3...2...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
"The watch"
My dad just reminded me of this old classic!
Jake is struggling through a bus station with two huge and obviously heavy suitcases when a stranger walks up to him and asks "Have you got the time?" Jake sighs, puts down the suitcases and glances at his wrist. "It's a quarter to six," he says. "Hey, that's a pretty fancy watch!" exclaims the stranger. Jake brightens a little. "Yeah, it's not bad. Check this out" - and he shows him a time zone display not just for every time zone in the world, but for the 86 largest metropolitan areas. He hits a few b**... and from somewhere on the watch a voice says "The time is eleven 'til six" in a very West Texas accent. A few more b**... and the same voice said something in Japanese. Jake continues "I've put in regional accents for each city". The display is unbelievably high quality and the voice is simply astounding. The stranger is struck dumb with admiration. "That's not all," says Jake. He pushes a few more b**... and a tiny but very hi-resolution, map of New York City appears on the display. "The flashing dot shows our location by satellite positioning," explains Jake. "View recede ten," Jake says, and the display changes to show eastern New York state. "I want to buy this watch!" says the stranger. "Oh, no, it's not ready for sale yet; I'm still working out the bugs, says the inventor. "But look at this," and he proceeds to demonstrate that the watch is also a very creditable little FM radio receiver with a digital tuner, a sonar device that can measure distances up to 125 meters, a pager with thermal paper printout and, most impressive of all, the capacity for voice recordings of up to 300 standard-size books," though I only have 32 of my favorites in there so far" says Jake. "I've got to have this watch!" says the stranger. "No, you don't understand; it's not ready." "I'll give you $1000 for it!" "Oh, no, I've already spent more than -" "I'll give you $5000 for it!" "But it's just not -" "I'll give you $15,000 for it!" And the stranger pulls out a checkbook. Jake stops to think. He's only put about $8500 into materials and development, and with $15,000 he can make another one and have it ready for merchandising in only six months. The stranger frantically finishes writing the check and waves it in front of him. "Here it is, ready to hand to you right here and now. $15,000. Take it or leave it." Jake abruptly makes his decision. "OK," he says, and peels off the watch. They make the exchange and the stranger starts happily away. "Hey, wait a minute," calls Jake after the stranger, who turns around warily. Jake points to the two suitcases he'd been trying to wrestle through the bus station. "Don't forget your batteries.