Dum Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Dum jokes. There are some dum mumbai jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these dum tsst puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Comical Puns & Laughs: Enjoy Fun, Witty Dum Jokes with Friends.

A goat, a drum, and a rattlesnake fall down a cliff...

ba dum tss

A goat, a drum, and a snake fell off a cliff..

Baa- dum- ssss

A sheep,a p**... and a snake walk together then fall of a cliff...

*Baah Dum Tssssss*

If I had a dollar for every time a girl told me I was unattractive, they'd eventually find me attractive.

ba dum tsss

jokes about dum

I made a joke about a midget criminal running down the stairs. The punchline is a little condescending.

Ba dum *tss*

Budum dum c**...

If a drummer quits band, but comes back later, would there be repercussions?

I fed my chickens a chicken wing...

I guess you could say they enjoyed themselves. *ba dum tss*

What do you call a fly when it retires?

A flew.

BUH DUM TSS!

No? Alright.. I'll see myself out.

I am a social vegan

I avoid meet.

Ba dum tiss

The Two Nuns and the Blind man.

There were once two nuns taking a bath together when all of a sudden they hear a knock at the door.
"Who is it?" yells out one of the nuns.
"It's me, the blind man." replies the man at the door.
"Ok, come on up." calls the second nun.
A short moment later, they heard the footsteps up the staircase and soon the door to the bathroom opened.
"Oh, hello Sisters. I like your new towels. Now where do you want the blinds?"
Bu dum tss

Have you heard about that new movie Constipation?

Oh wait - it hasn't come out yet!

*ba dum tss*

You can explore dum cymbal reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean dum chh dad jokes. There are also dum puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Two Snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff

buh dum tss

How do you email a sandwich?

In bytes.

*Ba dum tss*

What gym equipment do demons never use?

The exorcise bike.

Ba dum tiss.

I wish Medusa would stop objectifying people

Ba dum, tiss

How did Michael Jackson pick his nose?

From a catalogue.

ba dum tss

Do you want to know why I hate Russian dolls?

Because they are so full of them selfs

*ba dum tiss*

A lamb, a drum and a snake fall off a cliff

Baa, dum, tsss

What's the highest form of flattery?

A plateau!

Ba dum tss

Two drums and a cymbal jump off a cliff...

Ba dum tss.

While driving my car, I accidentally ran over a kid carrying a cymbal...

Ba dum, Tsss.

A kangaroo hops into the bar, the bartender, says "sorry we're closed"

The kangaroo says, "I thought you needed a bouncer"

*Ba dum tiss*

Comcast's Customer Service

ba dum tsss

Not many people can brag about getting a h**... from the barber after a haircut

but then again not many people cut their own hair.

​

Ba dum tiss.

Why did the atheist fail their quiz on exponents?

Because they don't believe in a higher power *bu dum tss*

My 9 year old son just told me this one

Q: What do you call 5 doctors and nurses on a ship?

A: A decade

Ba dum tish.

What do you call an alligator with a GPS?

A navigator. .... *ba dum tiss*

Why do g**... have a great sense of clothing?

They spend some time inside the closest! Bah dum tsssss

Why should every woman know a C++ programmer?

Because they'll always let friends access their private members.

Ba dum tiss.

Why don't scientists trust atoms?

Because they make up everything.

​

\*Ba dum tssss\*

(Hear me out) What did the fish say when it hit the wall?

Dam

**What did the wall say when the fish hit it?**

Dum bass

**What do you find at the bottom of the lake?**

Bass Turds

A goat, a drum and a rattlesnake fall off a cliff. What sound do they make?

Ba Dum Tss

Two mallards walk into a bar

The other one ducks

*Ba dum tsss*

What do you call a retarted fish

A dum bass

A magnet walks into an elemental singles bar and tries a pickup line on a pretty slab of metal.

"Is your name *Beryllium*? 'Cause you can alka-***lie*** next to *my* earth metal!"

The slab of ***lead*** says "Nah. You don't *attract* me."

Ba dum TSS!

What happened to the man who stole an advent calendar?

He got 25 days



(ba dum tsssss)

What do you call a bee that can't make up its mind?

A Maybe

​

....Ba Dum Tss

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

In the mirror.


Ba dum tss... >:-D!

What did my grandfather say before he kicked the bucket?

"I wonder how far I can kick this bucket"

Ba dum tsssh

Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

Ba dum tiss....

What food does a s**... serve his guests at a party?

p**... Roast. Ba dum dum

So, a Farmer's Daughter walks into a Bar . . .

. . .n.
Β *ba dum tish*

Who is the most popular guy on a n**... beach?

The guy carrying two cups of coffee and a dozen doughnuts.

*ba dum dishhhh* Yeah, don't worry people. Like this joke, I recycle a lot of things. No need to thank me - you're welcome.

Why is it funny to put a Sheep, a s**... man and a snake next to each other?

Baa Dum Tss

Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff.

"da dum, tshhhh"

"My new band's name is 1023 MB"

"Awesome! When are you guys playing?"

"I don't know. We don't have a gig yet."

Ba Dum Tss...

Why was the plant embarrassed?

It soiled itself. *Buh dum ts* *Dodges tomatoes*

Why did the dog sit in the shade?

It didn't want to be a hotdog.

*ba dum tsss

*ba dum tish

idk

Why did the priest go to the gym?

To exorcise.

^(ba dum tss)

So a clumsy comedian walks into a music shop.

ba dum tss

Two drums and a cymbal fall off a mountain.

Ba dum tsss

What is President Obama's favorite genre of music?

Barack 'n Roll.

Ba dum tss.

I tried getting into Guinness World record by smashing up music albums

I broke a lot of records

*ba dum tis*

What do you get when you cross Ant-Man and GI Joe?

Giant man (ba dum tsk)

I taught Sodium everything...

If i wasn't there, Sodium would be So Dum

The musical doctor

Man: Doctor Doctor I need a cure for my depression.

Doctor: Music is great therapy, here, I'll loan you my old guitar, it's broken but you should get some use out of it.

Man: Hang on, why would you lend me your guitar just like that? Is there some sort of hidden clause in this?

Doctor: Don't worry, there's no strings attached.

ba dum tss.

So a drum falls off a cliff...

... Ba dum psshhh!

What are 10 things you can always count on?

Your fingers! Bu dum tssss

My new joke

We were eating lunch at this place that was serving tequila chicken, but after the meal one of the guys questioned picking that particular menu item.

Him: I'm not sure that was chicken at all.

Me: Maybe it was tequila mockingbird.

Pa dum dum dishhh

911

Worker > ,What's your emergency?

Man > My wife is going to give birth!

Worker > Is this her first born?

Man > No,it's her husband

*Ba Dum Tss*

A drum set falls out of a window...

Ba dum tssh!

Did you hear about the frog that was parked incorrectly?

He was toad.

Ba dum tsss.

Two drums and a cymbal fall of a cliff

Ba dum
Chsh

What do you call a dancing tree doing math?

A log-a-rithm
Ba dum pshh

Why are cats always sitting on keyboards?

So they can play with the mouse

*bah dum tsss*

A sheep, a drum and a cat fall in a hole...

Ba dum hiss

Ive been s**... enough to develop amnesia...

I dont know what i was thinking .....

~~*ba dum tissss*~~

why do people carry umbrellas?

because umbrellas cant walk.
(ba dum tsss)

i s**... at jokes :((((

I ran over a child who was on his way to band practice carrying his cymbals. I'll never forget that horrible sound as I rolled past his motionless corpse.

Ba dum tiss

What do you call a perverted Magician?

Q: What do you call a perverted Magician?

A: David "Cop a Feel"

...ba dum cha!

What happens if you burn down a skyscraper?

You may have Dubai them a new one.

*bah dum tiss*

A man walks into a bar with a piece of green tarmac on his head...

The landlord says to the rest of the customers:

"Don't talk to him! He's a **cycle path**!"

Ba Dum Tss!

Why didn't the chicken to cross the road?

He chickened out.

(*Ba Dum Tss*)

I got a new dog from an island off the coast of Italy recently.

The problem is it Maltas everywhere.
Bu dum tssh

What type of college does planets go to?

Universe-ity.

Ba Dum Tss

What do you call Charles Manson's music?

A *cult* classic.

# *BA DUM TSS!*

Two snare drums and a cymbal fall on the ground

-Ba-
-Dum-
-Tssss-

2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff.

Well, not in that order

t**... ba dum

What does a mentally disabled lizard said to be diagnosed with?

A Reptile Dysfunction

*ba dum tss*

I'll be here all night folks

Fizzy drinks are

Soda-sgusting *bad dum tiss*

How would you call an online marketplace that is as popular as Amazon in Europe?

Danube *ba dum tsss*

What did the heart say after witnessing someone receive a massive burn?

Ba dum tss.

What do the Titanic and sixth sense have in common?

They both have that sinking feeling
(*Bu dum tss*)

What do you call it when a bee proposes to a bee queen?

A BEEtrohal!
ba dum tss....

My nephew had a cellphone wedding...

The ceremony was great but the reception was terrible.

Ba dum tss

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the dum handi puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working dum budum piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes