Duct Jokes

Funniest Duct Short Jokes

Short duct jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The duct humour may include short dock jokes also.

1. Kid: Waaaahhhhh! MY TOY IS BROKEN! Dad: Nothing a little duct tape can't fix.
   Kid: mrnm... mmrm.. rnmr...
2. What's the best thing about a roll of duct tape? It turns "no no no!" into "Mmm, mmm, mmmm"
3. 3 steps to fix anything 1. Try duct tape, if that doesn't work, see 2
   2. Try gorilla glue, if that doesn't work, see 3
   3. Try J.B. Weld, if that doesn't work, C4
4. My uncle always believed that "Between duct tape and WD-40 you can fix just about anything." I still can't believe it took seven years before he lost his medical license.
5. Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.
6. My gf and I are removing old ducting from our house that contains asbestos. She asked if the workers will for sure be able to get rid of it all. I told her they'll do asbestos they can!
7. One day a bunch of bullies came and duct taped me to a wall, but I had a good friend who tried and stop them. He stuck by my side.
8. My dad was a stubborn man. He couldn't understand why you shouldn't install a ceiling fan with duct tape. And then it hit him.
9. Duct Tape is like The Force... It has a dark side, and a light side, and it holds the universe together.
10. I just got a job cleaning air ducts and I don't like it very much, but at least I have a job. Thanks for letting me vent.

Share These Duct Jokes With Friends

Duct One Liners

Which duct one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with duct? I can suggest the ones about tube and vent.

1. What makes a girl go "Mmmmmmmmmm"? Duct Tape.
2. What turns "No, no, no" into "Mmmmmmm"? Duct tape.
3. Duct tape; turning "no-no-no" into "mm-mm-mm" since 1942.
4. What do you call a simian that lives inside a ventilation system? Duct-ape
5. Why I love duct tape? It can turn "No, no no!" into "mmph, mmmph, mmmph"
6. Silence is golden... ... duct tape is silver.
7. What did the motivational speaker say to the duct? You conduit!
8. Silence is golden Duct tape is silver
9. Consent is golden. Duct tape is sliver. And sometimes, you gotta come in second place.
10. What happens if you incarcerate a man inside a duct? He gets inducted.
11. You Can use Duct Tape to Fix Any Thing Except Depression
12. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
13. I'm already visualising the duct tape across your mouth.
14. Why do wrap duct tape around a goose?
15. My job is to clean ducts.... It's not very aventful

Duct Tape Jokes

Here is a list of funny duct tape jokes and even better duct tape puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• My doctor says I have antisocial personality disorder. At least, I think that's what he said. It was a bit hard to hear him through the duct tape.
• What"s the best thing about duct tape? It makes them go from "NO, NO, NO!" To "Mmmmmm, Mmmmm, Mmmmm" -Super Dave Osborn
• If duct taping a Matchbox Trans Am to one's ear and pretending it's a Bluetooth device is wrong, then maybe— hang on... I've gotta take this.
• Did you hear about the insect transport plane that crashed into the Duct factory? Don't worry, it's all caught on tape
• My mom asked me to paint her room for her. Apparently duct taping spray paint cans to a roomba Is not helping and why we don't love you anymore
• My Wife was yelling at me last night. Thank god she was! It reminded me we ran out of duct tape.
• Have you heard that duct tape can be used as an aphrodisiac? It turns "NO! NO! NO!" into "MMM! MMM! MMM!"
• How low is my self esteem? Well, I'm pretty sure the fbi guy who's responsible for watching me put duct tape on his screen.
• I had a blind date last night At least I think it was a date. The blindfold and duct tape was a bit different.
• What does duct tape and the Force have in common? They have a light side and a dark side and they keep the universe together.

Witty Duct Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun with Friends

What funny jokes about duct you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean dent jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make duct pranks.