Drunk Vomit Jokes
6 drunk vomit jokes and hilarious drunk vomit puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about drunk vomit that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Drunk Vomit Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good drunk vomit joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Drunk guy at a bar
So there's a drunk guy at a bar and all of a sudden he starts to v**.... Oh no, I vomited on my t-shirt, my wife is gonna kill me! Says the drunkard. Let me help you with that , says the bartender. The bartender goes to the drunk guy and says: tell your wife some idiot vomited on your t-shirt and gave you 10 dollar for the inconvenience. Off he goes, the drunk guy.. he tells his wife the story and hands her 20 dollar. But you said 10 dollar , replies his wife. Yes but the idiot also s**... in my pants!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man walks into a bar, his head hung in shame.
"What'll it be?" asks the bartender.
The man says, "Just a club soda. I think I'm done drinking."
The bartender fills the order. "Why?"
"Well," the man says, "Last night I got so drunk, I went home and blew chunks."
"I've been tending bar for 25 years," the bartender sympathizes, "and I have seen a lot of people v**... after drinking too much. It's not that big of a deal."
The man takes a long sip of the soda. "You don't understand," he says. "Chunks is my dog."
A drunk guy gets into a taxi..
-Ehh.. 'scuse me, driver... would it be okay if.. I left a few beers, some fried chicken, 2 tequila shots and some rice on your back seat?
-(confused)Ehm, sure.
*#vomits#*
Sorry people, I had to.
A drunk man exited a bar vomiting and almost got some on the timepiece of a police officer who was standing on the street.
The cop said, "not on MY watch"
May Sound like a Joke to Some
Husband comes home drunk and breaks some crockery,
vomits and falls down on the floor...
Wife pulls him up and cleans everything.
Next day wen he gets up he expects her to be really angry wid him....
He prays that they should not have a
fight..
He finds a note near the table...
"Honey..your favorite breakfast is ready on the table,
i had to leave early to buy grocery...
i will come running back to you, my love.
I love you. ...
He gets surprised and asks his son..,
'what happened last night..?
Son told...,"
when mom pulled you to bed and tried
removing your boots and shirt..
you were dead drunk and you said......
" Hey Lady ! Leave Me Alone...
I M Married !!!
A joke my girlfriend's German grandmother told me.
A drunk fisherman is walking home from the bar and is about to be very sick. He gets home but outside he vomits all of the beer he drank and all of the sausages he ate on the sidewalk.
A few moments later while the drunk is gathering himself, a small dog runs up and begins eating the sausages the man threw up. The man, only now just realizing there's a dog in front of him, is confused.
"Okay", he says to himself. "I remember where I got the beer from, and I remember where I ate the sausages, but I have no idea where I ate that dog!"
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