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Drummer Jokes

124 drummer jokes and hilarious drummer puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about drummer that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

This article has a collection of the best "drummer jokes" around. Get a laugh from these jokes about drummers, drumkits, and the differences between a drummer and a bassist. Check out the amusing drummer cartoon and see if you can agree with the bad drummer puns.

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Funniest Drummer Short Jokes

Short drummer jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The drummer humour may include short play drums jokes also.

  1. Did you hear about the drummer who gave all his daughters the same name? Anna 1
    Anna 2
    Anna 3
    Anna 4
  2. How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb? Depends. Sometimes it takes one. Sometimes it takes a Zildjian.
  3. My brother's a drummer and had twin daughters. You'll never guess what he named them! Anna 1, Anna 2
  4. What do you call a head injury at a drummer's convention in Moscow, Russia? A concussion at the Russian percussion discussion.
  5. A man asks a bartender: "How late does the band play?" "Only about half a beat behind the drummer." The bartender replies.
  6. What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter? Irr-elephant
    Hahahaha
    What did the drummer name his twin daughters?
    Anna-one, Anna-two.
    Buhahahahaha.
  7. The Truth About The Beatles John was the brain
    Paul was the heart
    George was the spirit
    Ringo was the drummer
  8. Two settlers hear a drum in the distance... "I do not like the sound of that" One settler said.
    "He's not our regular drummer" They hear over the hill.
  9. How can you tell when the stage is level? The drummer is drooling equally from both sides of his mouth.
  10. How do you know a hat belongs to a little drummer boy? It has a proper pom-pom, proper pom-pom, proper pom-pom...

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Drummer One Liners

Which drummer one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with drummer? I can suggest the ones about musician and drum solo.

  1. What do you call the drummer that just broke up with his girlfriend? Homeless.
  2. What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna 1, Anna 2
  3. What do you call a pretty lady on the arm of a drummer? A Tattoo.
  4. What do you call a drummer with no arms and no legs? A headbanger
  5. What do you call a guy who hangs out with musicians? A drummer.
  6. How do you confuse a drummer? Give him sheet music
  7. Little drummer Boy grew up and became a father to twin girls: Anna 1, Anna 2
  8. Why didn't the drummer commit the crime? He couldn't handle the repercussions.
  9. another corny joke What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one Anna two.
  10. How do you catch a drummer? By laying down a snare.
  11. A drummer got a tattoo of their drum kit... ...it was very cymbalic
  12. Did you hear the drummer who writes in heiroglyphic? Too many cymbal
  13. Our drummer got in trouble today We told him that there would be repercussions.
  14. How did the drummer sell their couch? Per cushion.
  15. Did you hear about the drummer that came out of retirement? There were repercussions

Drummer And Bassist Jokes

Here is a list of funny drummer and bassist jokes and even better drummer and bassist puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Did you hear about the time the bassist locked his keys in his car? It took like two hours to get the drummer out.
  • A drummer was standing outside of his car panicking because he accidentally locked his keys inside it. It was a very hot sunny day and the bassist was still inside the car.
  • What do you say when there's a singer, guitarist, bassist, and a drummer in a boat? Abandon ship
  • What do you call a love triangle between a drummer, a bassist, and a piano player? A bad combo

Drummer Timing Jokes

Here is a list of funny drummer timing jokes and even better drummer timing puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I once met a drummer who's timing was so bad, he began to get depressed... Eventually, he threw himself behind a train.
  • There was once a drummer who combusted every time he hit a cymbal. He crashed and burned.
  • How does Rick Allen (Def Leppard drummer) count in a 4 beat? *opens mouth, taps cheeks 4 times*
  • What member of a band always wears a watch The drummer because he keeps time

Bad Drummer Jokes

Here is a list of funny bad drummer jokes and even better bad drummer puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • How can you tell a good drummer and a bad drummer apart? Bad drummers don't call their mom on Mother's Day.
Drummer joke, How can you tell a good drummer and a bad drummer apart?

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What funny jokes about drummer you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean guitarist jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make drummer pranks.

Imagine if I was asked to be a backup for Ringo Starr by the Beatles

You may say I'm a drummer but I'm not the only one...

February 1st, 1234 AD must've been the birth of the worlds best drummer

One / two / one two three four!

What do you call a musician's best friend?

A drummer...

A guy walks up to the shopkeeper and asks for a Fender Strat, an Orange Amp and a Mooger Fooger pedal...

...the shop keeper says: "Are you a drummer?" and the guy responds: "Yeah how can you tell?"
The shop keeper responds: "This is a fish and chip shop mate."

A bass player runs into a bar...

where the guitar player and the singer are busy setting up. Breathless, he says "We've got a big problem! I locked my keys in the van!" "Whatever, man" says the singer, "We've got a gig to do, we'll worry about it later." "No, you don't understand" said the bassist, "the drummer is trapped inside!"

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Musician Jokes

Q: how do you get a guitarist off your porch?
A: pay for the pizza
Q: how many folk singers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 6. One to change it and 5 to sing about how good the old one was.
Q:what did the drummer get on his I.Q test?
A: saliva.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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Just some jokes about musicians.

How do you know the stage at a concert is level?
Drool is coming out of both sides of the drummers mouth.
What do you call a drummer with no girlfriend?
Homeless.
What do floutists eat for breakfast?
Flute loops.
How do you tune three oboeists?
Shoot 2 of them.
How many flute players does it take to change a light bulb?
One, they stand on the ladder holding the bulb in the socket and wait for the world to revolve around them.

A guy walks into a store and says...

A guy walks into a store and says, Excuse me, I'd like to buy a guitar pick and some strings.
The clerk looks at him uncomprehendingly. Pardon?
I'd like a guitar pick, please, and some strings.
The clerk thinks for a moment and says, You're a drummer, aren't you?
Yeah! How did you know?
This is a travel agency.

Why do drummers carry transparent lunchboxes?

So they know if they are going to the gig, or coming from it.
Ta-boom!

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B'dum tsss

A collection of jokes I have found over the years about drummers.
**NOTE:** Before you get offended, I AM A DRUMMER. I FIND THESE FUNNY TOO.
1. What do you call a drummer in a suit? The defendant
2. How can you tell a drummer's at the door? The knocking speeds up
3. What do you call a drummer with half a brain? Gifted
4. What does a drummer use for contraception? His personality
5. Did you hear about the drummer who finished high school? Me neither
6. What did the drummer say to the band leader? "Do you want me to play too fast or too slow?"
7. How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Five: One to screw it in, four to say that Neil Peart could've done it better
8. Why do guitarists put drumsticks on the dash of their car? So that they can use the handicapped parking space
9. How do you get a drummer off your porch? Give him the money for the pizza
10. What do you call a guy who hangs out with musicians? A drummer
Anyone got any more?

Did you hear about the drummer who fell and hit his head?

He was percussed.

Why couldn't the drummer make it to the show?

He locked the bass player in the car.

Musician's Joke: The guitarist of a band walks into their rehearsal room and sees the bassist and the drummer having an argument

Guitarist: "Why are you arguing?"
Bassist: "The drummer detuned one of my strings."
Guitarist: "So what's the problem?"
Bassist: "He won't tell me which one!"

What's the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?

With a drum machine you only have to punch the instructions in once

So there's a rock band playing a concert...

And they're almost at the end of their set and exhausted, and their minds start to wander. The guitarist looks out into the crowd and thinks to himself "gee, that girl in the front row is pretty cute, I should see if I can get her to come backstage after the show". The drummer thinks to himself "gee, after this gig I'll be able to afford a new high hat!" All the while, the bassist is up there thinkin "gee....D....F...."

Did you know that Al Gore was booted as the drummer from his high school band and replaced with a drum machine?

It turns out they preferred a digital beat over an Al Gore rhythm…

What type of seat does a Drummer sit on?

A percushion

How do you get a drummer to drink a beer

open it for him

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Who is the drummer for the Mexican Beatles?

g**... Starr

A drummer with no feet spoke poorly of the lead singer. His articulations were baseless.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Musicians are perverts.

The drummer sits in the back beating it, the guitarist is constantly f**... minors, the bassist is slapping it around, and they all like the pianist.

Never marry a drummer...

they beat things for a living.

What's the difference between a drummer and publicly traded stock?

Publicly traded stock will mature and make money.

Why didn't the drummer repeat his set?

Because there were no repercussions

How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Four. One to screw in the light bulb and three to talk about how Neil Peart could've done it better.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

I beat up a drummer in marching band.

I'm not afraid of any re-percussions.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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Drummers always have such lame jokes...

I've heard them all like a Zildjian times.

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What do you call the r**... guy that follows the band around?

The Drummer

What did the drummer get on his test?

Drool

What's a drummers favorite food?

Shredded beets!

How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, one to change the bulb, the other two to tell him he didn't do it as well as Steve Gadd.

What do you get for attempting human cloning with a drummer?

Repercussions.

I wish I was a professional drummer.

I could bang things and get paid.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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Budum dum c**...

If a drummer quits band, but comes back later, would there be repercussions?

What does a drummer wear on his head?

A hi-hat.

I'm in a band called Inadequate Detectives.

We're currently looking for a new drummer, but we haven't found the right guy yet.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What's the difference between a drummer and a toilet seat?

A toilet seat only has to put up with one a**... at a time.

3 musicians and a drummer walk into a bar.

What are the last words of a drummer, before he gets fired from the band?

"Hey guys, I wrote some songs"

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I feel sorry for the first drummer of the Beatles.

All he got was a s**... street named after him, while Ringo Starr got the love and affection of tens of women.

Some cavalry soldiers are pinned down by a bunch of Indians.

The Major yells to the Sergeant, "Sergeant, I don't like the sound of those drums!" one of the Indians hollers, "He's not our regular drummer!"

Three musicians and a drummer get on an elevator.

True story.

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What do you call 3 idiots who form a band?

Drum, Drum, and Drummer.

What do you call a drummer who talks too long?

A drag

In my band, our drummer uses two many precounts.

He always goes, "1 2 2 3 4!"

Who is the drummer for the Austrialian Beatles cover band?

ɹɐʇs oƃuᴉp

If the drummer is also the lead singer...

... Whose couch does he sleep on?

How many musicians in my band does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, we get the drummer to do it.

What did the drummer say about his favorite drum set?

Now THAT'S a drum set I can get behind!
... buh dum cschhhhhhhh

what do you call a drummer that hates guitars?

an instrumentalist!

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What's your favorite drink to have during Christmas time? Mine is the Little Drummer Boy.

It's 1 part r**..., 3 parts pum.

What did the sandwich say to the little drummer boy?

I am a po boy too.

A woman who is a month pregnant falls into a deep coma. Three months after giving birth, she awakes and asks the doctor about her baby...


Doctor: Well, I have good news and bad news for you. Which would you like to hear first?
Woman: Of course, the good news.
Doctor: You had twins, both girls, and they're both fine. Luckily, your brother was here to name them.
Woman: Oh, that drummer... What did he name the girls?
Doctor: Anna 1, Anna 2

Maybe 7/8 might get it

A drummer made a joke on beats.
4/4 did not get it.

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What type of cap does a s**... drummer wear?

A high hat.

After an orchestra drummer performed particularly poorly, the conductor sarcastically told him, "when they find someone who can't play any instrument, they give him two sticks and make him the drummer."

The drummer retorted, "and if he can't play that either, they take away one stick and make him the conductor."

How many drummer jokes are there?

At least a Zildjian
... I may have copied and Paiste-d this joke

How do drummers ask if they can take a break?

It's quite simple
Hey, you guys think we can work on stairway to heaven for a bit?

Two cowboys were riding through a canyon and from far off they heard the sound of drumming.

One of them said, "I don't like the sound of those drums." And a distant voice called out "He's not our regular drummer!"

Drummer joke, Two cowboys were riding through a canyon and from far off they heard the sound of drumming.

jokes about drummer