Drum Jokes
142 drum jokes and hilarious drum puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about drum that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
For fans of music, here's a collection of humorous jokes about snare drums, steel drums, bass drums and even the bad drummers in bands. Hilarious jokes about clarinets, bass and all sorts of instruments are included in this compilation. Enjoy!
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Funniest Drum Short Jokes
Short drum jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The drum humour may include short cymbal jokes also.
- My wife rotates playing her guitar, drum, or flute once a month. It's part of her minstrel cycle.
- Longest Drum Solo The longest drum solo was 10 hours and 25 minutes and it was performed by a child sitting behind me on a flight from LA to Tokyo.
- My music teacher at school told me never to hit a drum again or I could get in serious trouble. I did, and he was right. There was serious re-percussions
- Why is Def leppard the best band to listen to while driving? Because you only need one arm to drum along..
- Why did the accordion player sell his instrument and switch to the drums? He wanted to play something less complicated.
- A broken drum is the best gift for Christmas You just can't beat it.
On the other hand, a wife would be the worst gift because you definitely can... - I like to do the same thing to my girlfriend that I do with my drum set Pretend that I have one
- My girlfriend is in a band My girlfriend is in a band, and for our anniversary I bought her a new drum kit.
It was a cymbal of my love.
I hope this is an original joke. - I regret joining a band with a turkey on drums. He usually forgets his drumsticks so he has to wing it.
- Def leopard is the safest band to air drum to while driving Because you can keep one hand on the steering wheel.
Yeah, I know its Def Leppard, auto correct messed that up for me.
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Drum One Liners
Which drum one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with drum? I can suggest the ones about drill and percussion.
- A sheep, a drum and a snake fell off a cliff… Baa-Dumm-Tssssss….
- I repaired my drums after my son broke it... Now he has to deal with the repercussions.
- People are like drums... If you hit them with a stick, they will make noise.
- The best gift I ever received was a broken drum you can't beat that.
- What happens when you play the drums incorrectly? You get repercussions
- Two Snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff buh dum tss
- What's the best birthday present in the world? A broken drum! You just can't beat it!
- What do you call a midget playing drums in a subway? A metro-gnome
- What do you call a baby with a drum? A baby boomer.
- A drummer got a tattoo of their drum kit... ...it was very cymbalic
- Two drums and a cymbal jump off a cliff... Ba dum tss.
- What do you need to make trap music? A snare drum
- How would you describe Al Gore playing the drums? Algorithm.
- If you want an unbeatable christmas present for your friend, get them a broken drum.
- If Al Gore had his own drumming software company he should name it... AlGoreRythyms
Drum Set Jokes
Here is a list of funny drum set jokes and even better drum set puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why did the Chicken want to join a rock band??? He was the only one with a set of drum sticks...
- I broke the drums at the bar where I work, so my boss had to order a new set He told me there would be repercussions
- New drum set I'm thinking of picking up a new drum set. Any advice?
Don't worry about it. They aren't as heavy as they look. - A drum set falls out of a window... Ba dum tssh!
- I fell and hit my head on my drum set today... Me: Dad, I think I have a concussion
Dad: No son, you have a PER-cussion - A drum set falls out of a tree. Ba-dum-tis
- It's not the gift, but the thought that counts So how does getting Anne Frank a drum set for her birthday stack up?
- What did the drummer say about his favorite drum set? Now THAT'S a drum set I can get behind!
... buh dum cschhhhhhhh - What's black and very noisy? A crow with a drum set
- Bad birthday gift suggestion Drum set for Anne Frank.
Bass Drum Jokes
Here is a list of funny bass drum jokes and even better bass drum puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What musical instrument do you get if you fill a 55-gallon drum with fish? A bass drum.
- Really disappointed with the new Beatles album It's all drum & bass
- What allowed the B boys to make it in hip hop and drum n bass? The A men break
- Drum and bass Drum and bass takes two of my favourite things and adds a "d" and a "b" in front of them.
- What's Hitlers favourite Drum & Bass tune? The Nein.
- The Beatles just released a new album. Apparently it's just drums and bass.
- There's only one time I would fit in at a Drum and Bass rave. And that's when I see a spider.
Drum Solo Jokes
Here is a list of funny drum solo jokes and even better drum solo puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- My neighbor is so inconsiderate! He came pounding on my front door at 4am.
Thankfully I was already awake practicing my drum solo, but very rude!
Snare Drum Jokes
Here is a list of funny snare drum jokes and even better snare drum puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I am Poliachi Man laughs, roll on snare drum
Silly & Ridiculous Drum Jokes to Spread Joy & Laughter
What funny jokes about drum you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean guitar jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make drum pranks.
For my next trick, I intend to eat a
percussion instrument in a sandwich.
Drum roll please...
The Drums Must Not Stop
A man was exploring the African jungle and came upon a tribe of natives, their presence underscored by the distinctive and monotonous beating of drums. The man spoke with the tribe and they allowed him to stay with them and sleep on their grounds.
The first night, the man didn't sleep a wink due to the ongoing drumming so he spoke to the chief. "Chief, I got no sleep last night. Could you maybe stop the drumming for a night so I could rest?"
The chief replied, "The drums must not stop."
The man figured it was their culture and focused on enjoying the day, studying and spending time with the tribe.
That night, the drums again kept the man awake for the whole night and in the morning he spoke with the chief.
"Chief, please! I need some sleep; couldn't the drums cease for just one night for my health?"
The chief replied, "The drums must not stop."
The man, exacerbated, let the issue drop and tried to focus on the day at hand, but could not focus due to lack of sleep and the incessant pounding of the drums.
That night, the beating of the drums left the man sleepless yet again in the morning he angrily approached the chief.
"Chief, I've just about had it. The drums must stop; it is impossible to get any rest with them!"
The chief replied, "The drums must not stop."
"Why! Why can the drums not stop? What happens when the drums stop?!"
The chief replied, "Bass solo."
What's the most useless thing ever?
Anne Frank's drum kit.
Why do drummers carry transparent lunchboxes?
So they know if they are going to the gig, or coming from it.
Ta-boom!
Why couldn't the drummer make it to the show?
He locked the bass player in the car.
What's the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?
With a drum machine you only have to punch the instructions in once
Ancient Roman galley
The whip guy gets up next to the drum guy and addresses the galley slaves.
"I have good news and I have bad news."
"The good news is all you guys get extra bread this morning."
"The bad news is this afternoon the Captain wants to go water skiing."
Why did Santa's helper see the doctor?
Because he had a low "elf" esteem!
Did you know that Al Gore was booted as the drummer from his high school band and replaced with a drum machine?
It turns out they preferred a digital beat over an Al Gore rhythm…
How do you get a drummer to drink a beer
open it for him
Why did the groupie let the percussionist come over?
He promised he wouldn't drum in her house.
A man enters the drum section of a music store..
Shopkeeper: "Sir, you can play here for a while, but then I've gotta ask you to beat it."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Who is the drummer for the Mexican Beatles?
g**... Starr
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I wanted to gift my brother a drum set...
...but I decided to keep it for myself. **badum tss**
Why didn't the drummer commit the crime?
He couldn't handle the repercussions.
What is a broken drum kit's favorite file format?
PDF
puh-duh... ffffff
I threw out a sheep, a drum and a snake from an airplane
Ba-dum-tss
A sheep, a drum and a cat fall in a hole...
Ba dum hiss
Our drummer got in trouble today
We told him that there would be repercussions.
A drummer with no feet spoke poorly of the lead singer. His articulations were baseless.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I'm not saying you're a j**... but...
You're the kind of guy who would buy Anne Frank a drum set.
Why didn't the drummer repeat his set?
Because there were no repercussions
How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Four. One to screw in the light bulb and three to talk about how Neil Peart could've done it better.
Don't you dare go playing that drum again.
There will be repercussions!
There was a Political Drum-Off last week, sponsored by the mathletes...
Democrats and Republicans took turns showing off their best drum licks, while answering math problems in between.
Turns out the Republicans lost. They couldn't handle Al Gore rhythms.
What did one drumset say to the other drumset?
Drumroll please?
The World Health Organization have a new motto out this year! (drum roll please)
Who cares... ?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Drummers always have such lame jokes...
I've heard them all like a Zildjian times.
Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff...
Elderly woman dead.
What did the drummer get on his test?
Drool
Why are hippy drum circles like high frequency radiation?
They both cause the formation of free radicals.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why will Islamic State sweep all the winning Gold medals in 2018 Winter Olympics?
They will introduce Border Cross as an olympic sport.
Drum Fill!
What's a drummers favorite food?
Shredded beets!
There was once a drummer who combusted every time he hit a cymbal.
He crashed and burned.
Did you hear about the military drum major who was dishonorably discharged?
It was for conduct unbecoming.
What did one drum say to the other?
'Hi Tom!'
What is it called when a drum runs into a problem?
A conundrum.
What does a drummer wear on his head?
A hi-hat.
Why didn't the band director ever criticize the percussion section?
He didn't want to drum up discord.
Why do drum kits make the best superheroes?
They're a good CYMBAL of peace
What did the drummer call his twin daughters?
Anna 1, Anna 2
In the old days, when you illegally downloaded music it would transfer everything but the drum tracks, so you'd have to duplicate those on your own.
That's why they say you can't steal music without repercussion.
Why did the sXe kid get kicked out of the drum circle?
Because a circle has no straight edges.
Toys R Us
More like Toys Were Us (insert depressing drum roll here)
What's the name of Google's new deep learning drum beat software?
A.I.gorhythm
A drummer was standing outside of his car panicking because he accidentally locked his keys inside it.
It was a very hot sunny day and the bassist was still inside the car.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call 3 idiots who form a band?
Drum, Drum, and Drummer.
What pounds in your ear?
The drum.
Who is the drummer for the Austrialian Beatles cover band?
ɹɐʇs oƃuᴉp
I fed my chickens a chicken wing...
I guess you could say they enjoyed themselves. *ba dum tss*
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
When I have gay s**... it's like a drum set
Clap them cheeks like cymbals
Make him moan like a base drum
What do they teach at a drum clinic?
The rhythm method!
Maybe 7/8 might get it
A drummer made a joke on beats.
4/4 did not get it.
What do you call that cool drum break in the middle of "In The Air Tonight"?
a Phil
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Don't you dare hit that drum again!
If you do, there will be repercussions!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two drums and a cymbal were standing on a cliff and decided to kill themselves
Buh-dum-ch
My music teacher broke a drum in class with too much force
rip
You cant BEAT a good drum joke
BADUM TSH
One day a kid asks his dad to buy a drum set for him
His father replies " Sorry mate, can't do that. You'll play it all the time and the sound will drive me crazy"
The kid say "Don't worry dad, I won't disturb you. I'll only play it once you are asleep"
How many drummer jokes are there?
At least a Zildjian
... I may have copied and Paiste-d this joke
How do drummers ask if they can take a break?
It's quite simple
Hey, you guys think we can work on stairway to heaven for a bit?
