The Best 90 Dropping Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Dropping jokes. There are some dropping retrieve jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these dropping truman puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Dropping Jokes and Puns

You can tell the gender of an ant by dropping it in water. If it sinks it's girl ant,

If it floats it's boy ant.

Did you hear that NYC paid Hillary Clinton $2,000,000 as a consultant for New Years Eve?

They wanted an expert on dropping the ball at the last second.

A weather report for you

I just got off the phone with a friend living in North Dakota near the Canadian Border. He said that since early this morning the snow has been coming down, it is nearly waist high and is still falling. The temperature is dropping way below zero and the north wind is increasing to near gale force. His wife has done nothing but look through the kitchen window and just stare. He says that if it gets much worse, he may have to let her in.

Dropping joke, A weather report for you

I went through a Skrillex phase

I had to stop though. It got expensive dropping everything all the time!

Two Cops were waiting outside of a bar at closing time......

.....waiting to pop drunk drivers.

A man comes out of the bar, and he is obviously in rough shape. He is weaving all over the place, and almost falls when he trips on a curb. He fumbles with his car keys for almost two minutes, dropping them several times before he finally unlocks his car. He gets in, starts the car, and drives off.

Needless to say, the cops follow him: for several miles. The man's driving was flawless, perfect and in accordance with all traffic laws.

Finally, they decide to pull him over anyway. They turn on their lights. He pulls over instantly. They ask him to step out of the car; he calmly complies. They check his license; it is valid, and clean. They give him several field sobriety tests, each harder than the last. He passes all with flying colors.

The two cops look at each other, then the man, and ask "Sir, you aren't drunk, are you?"

"No, I'm not," says the man.

"Then why were you acting drunk when you left the bar?"

"I'm tonight's DD."

"Designated Driver?"

"No, I'm the Designated Decoy. All of my drunk friends drove off the other way."


Bring me back a nice Italian girl

A man is dropping off his wife, who's being sent on a business trip to Italy, at the airport. Before saying his goodbyes, he quips "Now be sure to bring me back a nice Italian girl." A week later, he's back at the airport to pick her up. After kissing her hello, he says "So did you get me that nice Italian girl?" to which the wife responds "Well I did my best, but we're going to have to wait 9 months to find out if it's a girl."

How can you drop an egg six feet without breaking it?

By dropping it seven feet - it won't break for the first six.

Dropping joke, How can you drop an egg six feet without breaking it?

Northeast Weather

I just got off the phone with my friend in Boston. He said that since early this morning, the snow has been nearly waist high and still falling. The temperature is dropping way below zero and the north wind is increasing to near gale force. His wife has done nothing but look through the kitchen window and just staring. He said, if it gets much worse, he may have to let her in.

Did you hear about the changes that are being made to the SAT?

They should rename the test from "SAT" to just "T" since they're dropping the essay.

What is someone doing when they are disposing of diseased radishes?

Dropping some ill beets.

A penguin has some car trouble...

A vacationing penguin is driving his car through Arizona when he notices that the oil pressure light is on. He gets out to look and sees oil dripping out of the motor. He drives to the nearest town and stops at the first gas station.

After dropping the car off, the penguin goes for a walk around town. He sees an ice-cream shop and, being a penguin in Arizona, decides that something cold would really hit the spot. He gets a big dish of ice cream and sits down to eat. Having no hands he makes a real mess trying to eat with his flippers. After finishing his ice cream, he goes back to the gas station and asks the mechanic if he's found the problem. The mechanic looks up and says "It looks like you blew a seal."

"No no," the penguin replies, "it's just ice cream."

You can explore dropping trou reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean dropping droppin dad jokes. There are also dropping puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Why did Skrillex lose his job at Long John Silvers?

He was always dropping the bass.

LPT: How to pick up girls

Try this:

1. Acquire several dozen limes.
1. Go up to them and then drop all the limes.
1. Start picking them up, but keep dropping them. The clumsier you look the better.
1. Keep doing this until you have their attention (this could take up to thirty minutes).
1. Finally gather up the limes. Try looking a bit sheepish.
1. Look them deeply in the eyes and say, "Sorry, I'm bad at Pickup Limes."

My wife dressed up as a police woman last night and giggled, "You're being charged with being good in bed..."

After two minutes she said she was dropping the charge due to lack of evidence. 

Why are DJ's so bad at fishing?

Because they're always dropping the Bass.

An SQL query walks into a bar

and starts dropping names

Dropping joke, An SQL query walks into a bar

Why do clumsy farmers make awesome DJ's?

cause they're always dropping beets

80-year-old's joke overheard at Costco food court

Have you ever seen geese flying in a v formation? Often one side of the v will be longer than the other. Do you know why?

...

There are more geese on that side of the v.

---

This old man was dropping tons of jokes in the Costco food court. A few were pretty funny.

I was dropping my kids off at school when I saw a sign that said "Watch for Children."

I'm going to miss them, but man this is a nice Rolex.


Why did the dog keep dropping his ball?

He had barkinsons disease.

Why was Dr. Dre kicked out of the farmer's market?

He kept dropping the beets.

My friend has a habit of dropping things.

It's getting out of hand.

Did you hear about Jon Snow dropping his new Apple product?

And now his watch has ended.

Why were the elephants kicked out of the pool?

Because they kept dropping their trunks....

Scientists predict human-level artificial intelligence by 2030...

...maybe sooner if the bar keeps dropping.

Despite constantly dropping the ball...

Gravity is pretty reliable

Guy joins the Army...

... but they are out of bayonets and ammo. They tell him to run into battle yelling "Bangitty bangitty bang!!! "Stabbity stabbity stab!"

Much to his surprise, enemy soldiers are dropping all around him.

Then, this really big enemy comes over the hill. The guy yells, "Bangitty bangitty bang!!! "Stabbity stabbity stab!", but the enemy keeps advancing and mows him down. As the enemy walks over him, he hears him shout, "Tankitty tankitty tank!"

Luke and Obi-Wan walk into a Chinese restaurant.

Luke and Obi-Wan walk into a Chinese restaurant. Ten minutes into the meal, Luke's still having trouble with the chopsticks, dropping food everywhere. Obi-Wan finally snaps, Use the forks, Luke.

Why did Hugh Jackman single handedly stop a Franciscan botanist from accidentally dropping a match in the forest?

Because only Hugh can prevent florist friars.

Why was the EDM producer bad at fishing?

Because he kept dropping the bass

Why did the farmer fire the DJ?

Because he kept on dropping beets.

Is it for real what they say about dropping the soap?

Sounds too good to be true!

How did the trout become a symbol for Christianity?

Easy. By dropping "trou"

Obesity levels in the U.K. are rapidly declining.

They're dropping pounds fast

My daughter was always dropping hints about wanting to be a ballerina.

I just never put tu and tu together.

I've Studied Various Religions

And here's what I found:

* Christianity was too cross.

* Islam kept dropping bombs on me.

* Buddhism kept repeating itself.

* Hinduism made me have a cow.

* and Judaism made my hair curl.

How do you keep a running back from dropping the football?

Paint it like a watermelon.

Why wasn't Skrillex allowed on the fishing trip?

He keeps dropping the bass

Arrested for being too good in bed!

My girlfriend dressed up as a police woman last night and giggled "I'm arresting you for being too good in bed"

After two minutes she said she was dropping the charges due to lack of evidence.

The Imperial Wizard of the KKK was just found dead near a river in Missouri...

Man, the moment the EPA gets threatened people start dropping white trash in our water.

Why can't you take Skrillex fishing?

He's always dropping the bass.

Why don't hippies make good chemists?

Because they're always dropping acid.

I went fishing with Skrillex once

It didn't end well, he kept dropping the bass

I used to go fishing with Skrillex

but he kept dropping the bass.

What the difference between playing a piano and dropping a piano?

One sounds like Thelonius Monk, and the other sounds like a melodious "thunk!".

A friend of mine gave me an expensive bottle of scotch, I was afraid of dropping it so I drank the entire bottle immediately.

Good thing I drank it because I fell seven times when biking home that night.

What did the bull say to his son after dropping him off to school?

Bison

Putting things in the bin may be 'lit'

But dropping them on the floor is litter

Fake taxi

Taxi driver: where to go?

Lady :Airport

Taxi driver: Mam,you are the 5th pregnant lady whom i'm dropping to airport today

Lady: But I'm not pregnant

Taxi driver: But we haven't reached the airport yet

The cost of dropping your phone on the floor

If you drop your iPhone on the floor the cost of getting the phone repaired is 149$.

If you drop your HTC on the floor the cost of getting the phone repaired is 200$.

If you drop your Nokia on the floor the cost of getting the floor repaired is 2000$.

Why did the DJ get fired from the supermarket?

He kept dropping the beets.

Why do Christmas trees suck at sewing?

They're always dropping their needles!

This book on marriage says treat your wife like you treated her on the first date

So after dinner tonight I am dropping her off at her parents' house

A husband and wife have grown old together.

He comes home to see his wife naked, standing on her hands.

He asks why shes in such a position

She responds "Well, we both know you can't get it up anymore, how about you try dropping it in."

My Uber driver's name was Bienvenido

When he was dropping me off I said " Thank you!" and he said "you're welcome" and I said "No, you're welcome."

A guy goes to the cemetery with his kids

As he is about to move a headstone, nearby passer-by asks him politely what is he doing. To that he responds "I'm just dropping off the kids at Grandma's"

The FBI just thwarted a July 4th terrorist attack in Cleveland.

But they couldn't stop LeBron from dropping a bomb on the city last night.

Why did the quadriplegic juggler get fired?

He kept dropping the quadriplegic

I'm absolutely done with friends who can't handle their alcohol.

The other day not even 3 of them could get me out of the club without dropping me.

Dropping your trousers is a terrible way to begin a job interview.

I learned that many moons ago.

Two Carpenters

Two carpenters were working on a house. One older one and one newer to the job. They were both working on one side of the house. After a few hours of working the older guy noticed the young guy looking at every nail, then dropping about half. The older one exclaimed about this and asked. Why are you wasting those perfectly good nails? the second guy answered
They're facing the wrong direction!
You idiot! The older man exclaimed. They're for the other side of the house!

The only thing better than holding your own baby...

Is dropping someone else's.

I always make sure to call my Japanese friends before I go visit them...

Turns out, they really don't like an unexpected fat man dropping in.

I was learning how to juggle, and I thought I was making good progress...

.... but I kept dropping the ball.

There's a guy sneaking around in grocery stores in my town dropping chunks of dry ice in boxes of cereal.

We're being attacked by a cereal chiller!

Why couldn't the DJ keep any of the fish he caught?

He kept dropping the bass

I did the math on Hurricane Florence rain fall...

There is predicted to be 17 Trillion gallons of rain falling from Florence.

The width of a milk jug is 5.5"

Rain x Width = 93 Trillion inches

93 Trillion divided by 12 gets you 7,791,666,666,666 Feet

Divided by 5280

1,475,694,444 Miles

Divided by 93,000,000 miles to get Astronomical Units

You get 15.8 AU's.

You're so fat, that even though Florence is dropping 17 trillion gallons of rain, It's still not enough to get to Uranus.

The Washington Redskins finally decided to drop their offensive name.

Dan Snyder, owner of the NFL Redskins, has announced that the team is dropping "Washington" from the team name, and it will henceforth be simply known as, "The Redskins." It was reported that he finds the word "Washington" imparts a negative image of poor leadership, mismanagement, corruption, cheating, lying, and graft, and is not a fitting role-model for young fans of football.

Managed to lose 1000 calories in five seconds...

...by dropping my cheeseburger :(

A cowboy and a red Indian are walking through the desert...

After a short time the Indian stops the cowboy before dropping to his knees and placing his ear to the ground. Upon standing the Indian says firmly "Buffalo come"

"That's amazing" says the cowboy, "How can you tell that?"

The Indian replies...

"Sticky face"

I've been dropping a lot of things lately...

It's really getting out of hand

What did the Buffalo dad say when dropping off his kid at school?

Bison

An American, a Frenchman and a Chinese walk into a bar.

An American, a Frenchman and a Chinese walk into a bar. The topic of WW2 comes up and the Frenchman says to the American, "Dropping two atomic bombs on Japan was a terrible mistake." The Chinese nods. "You should have dropped more than two."

A spill

While doing a lab experiment I was listening to music by a band who's bassist was a known drug abuser. During his solo, I slipped on some spilled vinegar & lost my grip on a beaker full of sodium hydroxide.
Looks like while he was tripping on acid dropping the bass, I was tripping on acid dropping the base

What did the Billboard Top 40 artist say when she broke up with her boyfriend before kicking him out of a helicopter?

new single dropping soon!

Why did the landscaper get fired?

He kept dropping his plants in public!

People who take phone calls while dropping a deuce...

...Are real shit-talkers.

I've been dropping everything tonight.

It's really getting out of hand.

Lifeguard kicked some elephants out of the pool

Apparently they kept dropping their trunks.

Luke and Obi-Wan walk into a Chinese restaurant

Ten minutes into the meal, Luke's still having trouble with the chopsticks, dropping food everywhere. Obi-Wan finally snaps, *Use the forks, Luke.*

So I heard that the stock prices of fertilizer companies around the world started dropping about two months ago.

Apparently it has something to do with donald trump becoming the world's leading supplier of bullshit.

When it comes to dropping food on the floor, I use the 5 second rule.

Only problem is I have 2 second dogs.

What did the dad say after dropping his son off at Yellowstone National Park?

Bison!

Get to the bunker, a nuclear bomb is dropping

"You can't force me in a bunker, I am an American, I have rights"

My friend stepped in a mound of fire ants as he was dropping off his ballot last night...

He was telling me how his vision got blurry and he could hardly walk.

I first asked him if he was ok. Then I said, "that sounds like voterinterfireants to me".

Taylor Swift is dropping albums like I'm dropping pounds

Only two, but still more than anyone expected.

I read that I should treat my wife like I did on our first date...

...so tonight I'm dropping her off at her parents.

Why isn't Skrillex invited fishing?

Because he keeps dropping the bass.

What's the different between Bitcoin and my wife?

My wife doesn't go down on me.


Get it? Bitcoins dropping and I'm in a horrible marriage.

My girlfriend said she is leaving me because of my constant name dropping

David Beckham warned me this might happen...

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the dropping tostitos jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working dropping fell piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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