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Dropped Jokes

154 dropped jokes and hilarious dropped puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about dropped that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

This article dives into the various dropped jokes that you hear around you. Find out why your pocket dropped faster than an egg, why your crestfallen face was thrown and why jokes can fall harder than you think! Uncover the mysteries behind jokes and laughter.

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Funniest Dropped Short Jokes

Short dropped jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The dropped humour may include short dropping jokes also.

  1. My girlfriend dressed up as a policewoman and told me I was under arrest on suspicion of being good in bed. After 2 minutes all charges were dropped due to a lack of evidence.
  2. The show COPS has been dropped from broadcast honoring the longstanding tradition of police turning off their cameras.
  3. You can tell the gender of an ant by dropping it in water. If it sinks it's girl ant, If it floats it's boy ant.
  4. Did you hear that NYC paid hillary clinton $2,000,000 as a consultant for New Years Eve? They wanted an expert on dropping the ball at the last second.
  5. A girl walks into a dry cleaner She drops off her dress and turns to leave. The owner says, "Come again!". She says, "No it was toothpaste this time."
  6. Taylor Swift is dropping albums like I'm dropping pounds Only two, but still more than anyone expected.
  7. My wife asked me, Why don't you treat me like you did when we were first dating? So I took her to dinner and a movie then dropped her off at her parents' house.
  8. Why was the little ink drop crying? His mother was in the pen and he didn't know how long the sentence would be.
  9. A blonde drops off her dress to the dry cleaners The lady says, "Come Again!"
    The blonde says, "No, it's toothpaste this time."
  10. An old lady in front of me dropped $20 and I thought, "What would Jesus do?" So I turned it into wine. I bought wine.

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Dropped One Liners

Which dropped one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with dropped? I can suggest the ones about dropping like and lowered.

  1. The price of oil has dropped so far that... Exxon-Mobil had to lay off 25 Congressmen.
  2. Are You a gorilla Exhibit? Because I want to drop a baby in you.
  3. What do you get if you drop a piano down a mineshaft? A flat minor
  4. Sometimes I miss my ex. So I drop it into reverse and try again.
  5. If I had a drop of beer for every time I made a bird pun.. I'd have toucans.
  6. What is the best thing about dating a homeless girl? You can just drop her off anywhere.
  7. I dropped my cactus the other day Worst part is, I caught it
  8. I dropped my laptop in the middle of the ocean A dell must be rolling in the deep
  9. The US just dropped a new single today It quickly became the number 1 hit in Afghanistan
  10. Dropped my phone in a load of mayo What the Hellmann
  11. Despite constantly dropping the ball... Gravity is pretty reliable
  12. What do you get if you drop a piano down a mine shaft? A flat miner
  13. If you missed the ball drop last night.... Just watch FSU in the Rose Bowl
  14. I went fishing with Skrillex once It didn't end well, he kept dropping the bass
  15. I dropped my phone in the bath Now it's syncing.

Bomb Dropped Jokes

Here is a list of funny bomb dropped jokes and even better bomb dropped puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What's the hardest part breaking up with a Japanese girlfriend? You have to drop the bomb on her twice before she gets it.
  • Whats the worst thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl You have to drop the bomb twice before she finally gets it
  • What's the hardest part about breaking up with a Japanese chick? You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.
  • I broke up with my Japanese girlfriend but she keeps calling me Seems like I have to drop the bomb twice.
  • So the US Military dropped a 22,000 lb bomb on ISIS today. That moves Amy Shumer's special to the second spot for largest bomb for the year.
  • What's the worst part about dumping a Japanese girl? You gotta drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.
  • Why is it so hard to break up with a Japanese Girl? You have to drop the Bomb twice before she gets the Message.
  • The worst part about breaking up with my Japanese girlfriend? Having to drop the bomb twice for her to get the message.
  • So, I broke up with my Japanese girlfriend recently. I had to drop the bomb twice before she got the message.
  • Whats the worst thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets it

Accidentally Dropped Jokes

Here is a list of funny accidentally dropped jokes and even better accidentally dropped puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I accidentally dropped my phone from a 20-story building. It's a good thing I had it on Flight Mode.
  • I accidentally dropped my girlfriends epilepsy medication in the washing machine... ...now her clothes don't fit anymore
  • Life Pro Tip: If you accidentally drop ice cubes on the kitchen floor, quietly kick it under the refrigerator. Soon it'll be water under the fridge.
  • We were dissecting toads in lab... When I accidentally dropped mine onto my feet. I tried to hide it, but the instructor saw and made me leave for wearing open toad shoes.
  • What do you call it when you accidentally drop a flower? An oopsy daisy.
  • LPT: If you accidentally drop ice cubes on the floor, quietly kick them under the refrigerator. It'll soon be water under the fridge.
  • After using the bathroom, I accidentally dropped one of my Dutch shoes in the water…. Now there's a clog in the toilet.
  • The UPS guy accidentally dropped my package Ups
  • There are these two cowboys herding some Bulls, One of them accidentally drops his lasso. The other picks it up and asks "Is this your rope?" To which the other replied, "No, this is America."
  • I accidentally dropped my phone from the 4th floor Luckily it did not break because it was on airplane mode.
Dropped joke, I accidentally dropped my phone from the 4th floor

Charges Dropped Jokes

Here is a list of funny charges dropped jokes and even better charges dropped puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Jussie smollet had to pay 10,000 to chicago and do community service to get his charges dropped... I hope he isnt beating himself up over this
  • My wife dressed up as a police woman last night and giggled, "You're being charged with being good in bed..." After two minutes she said she was dropping the charge due to lack of evidence. 
  • I shoplifted 23 cans of Pepsi from the store and got arrested, but the judge dropped the charge He knew i stole 23 cans of Pepsi, but he said that doesn't make a case.
  • I was falsely accused of throwing batteries at people All charges were dropped
  • My girlfriend dressed up as a cop, and told me she would arrest me for being great in bed. Unfortunately, all charges were dropped due to a lack of evidence.
  • Why was He so excited? Because they finally dropped his charges.
  • My GF dressed up as a policewoman and arrested me of being good in bed. After two minutes all charges were dropped
  • Did you hear about the Asian cuisine chef that dropped a dumpling on the floor? He was charged with wonton endangerment.
  • What happens when you drop a cantaloupe? You get charged with a criminal melony.
  • My mistress dressed as a policewoman arrested me under suspicion of being too good in bed After 10 seconds of gun action, the charges were dropped due to lack of evidence

Dropped Egg Jokes

Here is a list of funny dropped egg jokes and even better dropped egg puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Told by a 7 year old boy: How do you drop on an egg on a concrete floor without cracking it. Concrete floors are really hard to crack.
    Then he said "you were thinking about the egg weren't you!"
  • How can you drop an egg six feet without breaking it? By dropping it seven feet - it won't break for the first six.
  • How can you a drop a egg on concrete without cracking it? Anyway you want. Concrete doesn't break easily.
  • Q: How can u drop an egg onto a concrete floor without breaking it? A: Any way you want, concrete floors tend to be very hard to crack.
  • A mother Chameleon was so overcome with joy when her eggs hatched that her camouflage dropped. Looking down excitedly, she exclaimed, "I've become apparent!"
  • Please drop your best one-liner dad jokes below, I need new ones. By one-liner I mean something along the lines of let's make like an Autobot and roll out or put an egg in your shoe and beat it
  • *true story. I dropped an egg on my feet while cooking breakfast I guess the yolk's on me...
  • The French chef's apprentice really messed up when he dropped an ostrich egg on the floor. Big ouef
  • "Here, you take the baby and give me the eggs.... ...You always drop everything!"
  • What do you get when you drop an egg off the Empire State Building? New Yolk

Dropped Your Pocket Jokes

Here is a list of funny dropped your pocket jokes and even better dropped your pocket puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • The owner of a dry cleaning business finds a $20 bill left in the pockets of a pair of pants that was dropped off. He now has a dilemma.... Does he tell his partner or not?
Dropped joke, The owner of a dry cleaning business finds a $20 bill left in the pockets of a pair of pants that wa

Comical Puns & Laughs: Enjoy Fun, Witty Dropped Jokes with Friends.

What funny jokes about dropped you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean dumped jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make dropped pranks.

I dropped my knife and cut off a toe

After the surgery to reattach it, the doctor comes in.
Doctor: I have some good news and bad news.
Me: Tell me the bad news first doc.
Doctor: The bad news is they mistook a piece of candy for your toe.
Me: No way. Whats the good news?
Doctor: The good news is the surgery was successful.
Me: What are you trying to say?
Doctor: You now have a Tic-Tac toe.

I was sorting out my loose change when I dropped a 1p coin and saw it roll into a drain, which everyone around me thought was hilarious.

Laughing at my ex-pence.

I met a beautiful girl in the park.

I met a beautiful girl in the park the other evening. There was an instant spark between us and she immediately dropped to her knees and laid on the grass at my feet. As we were making love, I thought .... "These taser guns are well worth the money."

So a French WW2 rifle came up for sale at an auction, the description read...

French rifle, never used, dropped once.

New to Baseball

Coming home from his Little League game, Billy swung open the front door very excited. Unable to attend the game, his father immediately wanted to know what happened. "So, how did you do son?" he asked.
"You'll never believe it!" Billy said. "I was responsible for the winning run!"
"Really? How'd you do that?"
"I dropped the ball."

My niece dropped this joke on me today: Why did the king go to the dentist?

He needed to get a new crown

Why are French guns the best to buy?

They've never been fired, and only dropped once.

So the essay portion of the SATs will be dropped in 2016...

I guess we'll just have to call them the Ts.

A little boy asks his mother; why is my name Feather?

When you where a little baby a feather dropped on your head. The next day her other son walks up to her and asks: 'Mom, Why is my name Leaf?' 'That is because when you where a little baby a leaf fell on your head.' The next morning her last son walks up to his mother and asks: 'aaiaiijhhh jaijahhhuuhhghhhhhh nnggh?' 'Shut up, Fridge.'

My dad is German and dropped this one on me the other day.

Dad: I never told you this but, my great grandfather died in the holocaust.
Me: Oh, man thats terrible.
Dad: Yeah, he got really drunk one night and fell off of the guard tower.

I'm selling a WWII relic....

A beautiful French rifle. It's never been fired and only dropped once.

What did the biologist's sister say to her sister after she dropped a beaker on her foot...

Mitosis

What did Barack Obama say when he dropped his shell at the beach?

Oh no Michelle !

A blonde and a brunette decide to rob a bank...

The brunette is the getaway driver. She told the plan to the blonde, told her to be back in less than 5 minutes, and dropped her off at the front door of the bank.
10 minutes goes by.... No sight of the blonde...
20 minutes goes by... No sight of the blonde...
Finally, after a half hour the blonde comes running out of the bank, dragging the safe by a long rope. As soon as the blonde gets into the car, the brunette sees the guard running as fast as he can towards them, with his pants at his ankles...
After a few moments of silence, the brunette realizes what happened and screamed to the blonde, " You IDIOT! You were supposed to tie up the guard and blow the safe!!!"

What'll happen if a piano is dropped on a man?

He will B flat

Selling a french WW2 rifle

Never fired, only dropped once.

French rifle for sale.

Never fired. Dropped twice.

A woman dropped a $10 note next to me. I thought, 'What would Jesus do?'

I turned it into wine. I bought wine.

Where did the little Asian girl go when the little boy dropped by?

Everywhere.

My mom dropped this one on me

Mom and I, her 27-year-old son, had had an argument about my clothes. She pointed to a hole in my shirt and said, "There's a big hole in your shirt!"
I responded, "Yeah? Well there's a big hole in your face and dumb things keep coming out of it," pointing to her mouth.
Without a pause, she snaps back, "Not nearly as dumb as the thing that fell out of my other hole 27 years ago."

Someone dropped their Scrabble in the middle of the road...

...that's the word on the street anyway.

My girlfriend dropped this on me after some Tex-Mex last night ...

"I'm chilly"
She steps closer and takes my hand
"Will you be my con queso?"
And before I could even respond ...
"Sorry, was that too cheesy for you?"

I heard the kid who fell into the gorilla pit was actually trying to get the jewelry his mother dropped.

He didn't get the gold but he got the silver back.

Husband: Guests are coming tonight.

What's for dinner?
Wife:I am not well today, so there's only green beans.
Husband:No worry. I have an idea. When the guests arrives you'll welcome them and I'll go to the kitchen and drop one utensil and then you'll say "what happen" . Then I'll say "oh no!! I dropped the chicken " . Then again drop another utensil and say "I dropped the spaghetti. Now we only left with green beans."
*Guest arrives*
Wife: Welcome. Please make yourself comfortable.
* loud sound comes from the kitchen *
Wife: Everything alright, honey?
Husband: Sh**t. I dropped the beans.

My mum tripped and dropped the basket of clothes she'd just ironed.

It may sound far-fetched but it's true. I watched it all unfold.

Why did the Jews wander in the desert for 40 years?

Because one of them dropped a nickel.

During an argument with my wife, she dropped the old "why did you even marry me?" line.

Apparently "Your sister was already taken" was not the right answer.

A cop is walking down the street and notices

A cop is walking down the street and notices a young blonde woman down on her knees under a streetlight. Can I help you? he asked.
The blonde woman replied, I dropped my diamond ring and I'm looking for it.
The cop asked, Did you drop it right here?
No, responded the blonde, I dropped it about a block away, but the light's better here.

What do you call someone who was dropped on their head as a baby?

Hard to say- every one of them has their own pronouns now.

Guys I just recently bought a 256GB iPhone 7 Plus, my son dropped it and the screen shattered. Anyways I'm doing a giveaway!

The kid is 8 years old, cute, thin and not really tall.

I hopped in a cab after work and said to the cabbie

"My wife won't put out any more. Take me somewhere I can get an easy chick that won't say no"
10 minutes later he dropped me off at my house and said
"Just tell her Larry sent you"

I just purchased a new iPhone 7 Plus, and my son dropped it, So i'm giving it away.

He's 8 years old, tall and quite thin. Good with pets.

My girlfriend and I had s**... in my car last night. Was pretty uncomfortable though...

... Maybe we should have dropped her parents off first.

I read that donations to s**... banks have dropped dramatically...

It's probably because, these days, most men do their banking online...

A nice clean jewish joke

The young rabbi was an avid golfer. Even on Yom Kippur, the holiest day of the year, he snuck out by himself for a quick nine holes.
On the last hole he teed off, and a gust of wind carried his ball directly over the hole and dropped it in for a hole in one.
An angel who witnessed this miracle complained to God, This guy is playing golf on Yom Kippur, and you cause him to get a hole in one? This is a punishment?
Of course it is, said the Lord, smiling. Who can he tell?

I dropped my Nokia today.

Now I'm upset because I have to replace my floor.

TIL there's a city named after a waffle dropped on the beach

San Diego

My missus was furious at me for k**... dropped ice-cubes under the refrigerator.

But now it's just water under the fridge.

I feel bad for the hypnotist I saw yesterday

He hypnotized 7 guys then dropped the microphone on his foot and screamed:
F*c**... me

Two women are talking in Heaven

One woman asked the other, "how did you die?" The woman replied, "I froze to death." She asked the same question to the other woman, she replied, "I suspected that my husband was cheating on me and looked everywhere in my house for evidence. I couldn't find anything and I dropped dead from exhaustion." The other woman replied "maybe if you had checked the freezer we would both be alive."

I think my dog is upset I quit doing drugs

He hasn't talked to me since the last time I dropped acid.

I have a French WW2 rifle for sale

Never been fired, only dropped once.

For sale: French Rifle

Condition: never fired, dropped once.

That awkward moment when the woman you're dancing with bends over so you can grind it...

But it turns out she just dropped an earing, and no one else in McDonald's can hear the music on your iPod.

A man was out on a fishing trip

When suddenly, he dropped one of his oars into the water, frustrated that he couldn't get the boat moving, he decided to seek help.
He saw someone with two beautiful women on his boat who also had a spare oar. "Excuse me, may I borrow one of your oars?" he yelled.
The man appeared offended, "thems ain't 'ores, thems me sisters!"

I dropped my wife's epilepsy medicine in the washing machine instead of fabric softener.

Now her clothes don't fit.

A dad is sitting on the couch in his living room

He hears his son start walking down the stairs and then loud b**... and rumbling
Dad: Son what happened?
Son: it's nothing i just dropped my shirt down the stairs
Dad: it sounded a lot heavier than a shirt
Son: yeah it's because i was wearing it

A thief pointed a knife at me and said "your money or your life"

I smiled and told him I was married, so I have no money or a life. He dropped the knife and we hugged and cried for a moment.

Last year I entered a marathon.

The race started and immediately I was the last of the runners. It was embarrassing.
The guy who was in front of me, second to last, was making fun of me. He said, "Hey buddy, how does it feel to be last?"
I replied, "You really want to know?"
Then I dropped out of the race.

Three girls are in the back seat, their parents are in the front

Girl 1: Mom, why did you name me Violet?
Mother: Oh Violet, your grandmother dropped a violet on your head the day you were born.
Girl 2: Mom, why did you name me Daisy?
Mother: When we were walking out of the hospital the nurse put a daisy on your head.
Girl 3: Jwoandbwoqmsbonbf, whwhsbsowngk
Father: Shut up cinderblock

Johnny became a mailman after hearing how they always slept with women as part of the punchline of jokes. He figured he'd tell the jokes to mothers as he dropped of the mail and then sleep with them. He dropped off package after package and told joke after joke, but no mothers ever slept with him.

One day he asked a mother if he's been mislead by the jokes. Maybe mother's really never slept with the mailmen and the jokes were misleading.
The mother said, oh honey, it's not the jokes, it your delivery.

It's a little known fact that chuck Norris was dropped twice as a child

Once on Hiroshima and once on Nagasaki

Last night my girlfriend dressed up as a policewoman and told me I was under arrest on suspicion of being good in bed…

2 minutes later she told me all the charges were dropped due to lack of evidence.

What did the buffalo say to his son when he dropped him of at school?

Bison.

I'm so sick of my friends not being able to handle their alcohol

Last night they dropped me 3 times while carrying me home

A flat earther snuck into a physics seminar

While the speaker was giving speech on recent development about gravity, flat earther shouted
" Why do you even think that gravity is real? "
Speaker dropped the mic.

Why do the British pronounce British as Bri'ish?

The Americans dropped the t

Guys i just bought a 256GB iPhone 11, my brother dropped it and the screen shattered. Anyways I'm doing a giveaway!

The kid is 6 years old, cute, thin and not really tall.

This pastor decided to skip church one sunday morning and go play golf.

He told his assistant that he wasn't feeling well. He drove to a golf course in another city, so nobody would know him.
He teed off on the first hole. A huge gust of wind caught his ball, carried is an extra hundred yards and dropped it right in the hole, for a 450 yard hole in one.
An angel looked at God and said "What'd you do that for?" God smiled and said "Who's he going to tell?"

I used to date an air stewardess from Helsinki

I dropped her off at work one day and she just vanished into Finnair

I once had to pretend that i was taking a s**..., so I dropped a bottle of soap in the toilet

It was a shampoo.

earlier today I dropped an ice cube

It slipped under the refrigerator and I couldn't reach it. I was really upset about it at first but now I'm over it. water under the fridge.

How to stay in class

A college student walks into a bar and orders a beer. "What a day. Our calculus instructor has to be one of the most difficult professors on the campus," the student says. "If she wasn't so drop-dead gorgeous I would have dropped the class already." "So I guess you could says she's easy on the eyes," the bartender says. "But hard on the pupils?"

I dropped a huge bottle of ketchup on my foot yesterday....

It caused severe pain To-ma-toes.

A man wins a horse race

A man won a horse race after the other horse dropped dead before reaching the finish line.
However, the winner had a hard time enjoying his victory, because it's no fun beating a dead horse!

A few hours ago I dropped a piece of ice

It slid under the refrigerator. I was really upset at first but now it's water under the fridge.

Dropped joke, A few hours ago I dropped a piece of ice

jokes about dropped