Driving Range Jokes
9 driving range jokes and hilarious driving range puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about driving range that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Driving Range Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good driving range joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
my mate rang me earlier....
My mate rang me earlier and says "Hey dude, what you up to?" "Probably failing my driving test" I say
An elderly man was driving his car down the motorway..
An elderly man was driving his car down the motorway when his mobile phone rang.
Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "George, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on the M40. Please be careful!"
"It's not just one car," said George. "It's hundreds of them!"
So I rang the tourist office and asked:-
'What's the quickest way from the Holiday Inn to the museum?'
'Are you walking or driving?'
'Driving.'
'Well, that would be the quickest way.'
They banned talking on mobile phones while driving in Germany
With the new law, a man went to an electronics shop looking for something that would help him to answer his calls, but still keep his focus on driving. The store employee offered to have his brother Hansel ride with him and put the phone up to his ear when it rang.
The man said "No, that won't work. Do you have a Hans-free device?"
A man goes golfing
And he hits the most incredible drive, an absolute rocket. 100 down range a bird flies into the middle of the fairway, gets smoked by the ball and drops down dead. The man walks up to the bird and sees that the ball has gone right through!
This begs the question, is it a birdie or a hole-in-one.
Roosters
A man was driving down a quiet country lane when out into the road strayed a rooster. Whack! The rooster disappeared under the car in a cloud of feathers.
Shaken, the man pulled over at the farmhouse and rang the doorbell. A farmer appeared.
The man somewhat nervously said, I think I killed your rooster, please allow me to replace him.
Suit yourself, the farmer replied, the hens are round the back.
What happens when you put a bar at a golf range?
A lot of drunk driving.
The latest thing in the world of chickens.
A guy is driving down a country road when suddenly a chicken darts into the road ahead of him. He swerves to miss it but is pretty sure he hit it. When he looks in the rearview mirror, though, he doesn't see the chicken. When he looks back forward, he sees that the chicken is running ahead of the car! Since he's doing about 40 mph, this astounds him. He decides to follow the chicken.
Down the road a bit, the chicken turns down a dirt lane and then runs into a barn yard, where a farmer is scattering feed to hundreds of free-range chickens. He then notices that all of the chickens have four legs! Incredulous, he asks the farmer what the deal is with the four-legged chickens.
"Well," the farmer replied, "I noticed that people really like their drumsticks and there are never enough to satisfy everyone who wants one at the dinner table. So I spent years breeding a four-legged chicken so that everyone who wants a drumstick could have one."
"That's brilliant!" said the man. "What do they taste like?"
"Don't know." answered the farmer. "Never been able to catch one."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Love Dress.
The mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently married couple' s house.
She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house to see her daughter-in-law standing n**... by the door.
'What are you doing?' the mother-in-law asked.
'I am waiting for my husband to come home from work,' the daughter-in-law replied.
'Why are you n**...?' asked the mother-in-law.
'This is my love dress,' the daughter-in-law replied.
'LOVE DRESS! You are n**...,' said the mother-in-law.
'But my husband loves it when I wear this dress.
It makes him happy and he makes me happy,' said the daughter-in-law.
'I would appreciate your leaving now because my husband will be home any minute,' the daughter-in-law continued.
Soured by all of this romantic stuff, the mother-in-law left.
On the way home, she thought about the 'LOVE DRESS' and got an idea.
She undressed, showered, applied her best perfume, and waited by the door for her husband to come home.
Finally, the pickup truck drove up the drive way, and she took her place by the door.
The father-in-law opened the door, and immediately saw his wife n**... by the door.
'What are you doing?' he asked. 'This is my love dress,' the mother-in-law replied. 'Needs ironing,' he replied.
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