Driving Instructors Jokes
35 driving instructors jokes and hilarious driving instructors puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about driving instructors that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Driving Instructors Short Jokes
Short driving instructors jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The driving instructors humour may include short driving instructor jokes also.
- My driving instructor told me to pull over somewhere safe. Two minutes later he said, "Why haven't you pulled over yet?"
I said, "Because we're still in Manchester." - I have a Russian driving instructor. He tells me to "Putin to 1st" but i always end up Stalin.
- Bob Ross used to say, "There are no mistakes, just happy little accidents." Lovely man, terrible driving instructor.
- Driving I failed my driver's test today. The instructor asked me "What do you do at a red light?" I said "I usually check my emails and see what people are up to on Facebook."
- "You've got to let people know where you're going!" said my driving instructor as we merged on to the expressway... "OK!" I replied as I updated my Facebook status.
- I just failed driving exam The instructor said I failed at signals. I don't get it. I keep giving middle finger to the drivers honking at me.
- Driving test (Blonde) Why did the blonde keep failing her driving test?
Every time the instructor said "let's start" she would jump to the backseat ...
....
.... - As a driving instructor, let me say SCUBA divers make terrible drivers. But, to their credit, at least they know to slow down for bends.
- A gypsy is doing his driving test. The instructor asks him: What road sign is that?
The gypsy replies: Aluminium - My driving instructor said that it was important to understand how to use universally understood hand signals. Funny, his whole tune changed when I started flipping people off.
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Driving Instructors One Liners
Which driving instructors one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with driving instructors? I can suggest the ones about driving lessons and driving lesson.
- Me: Did I pass? Driving instructor, *swimming away*: No
- Having Gandalf as a driving instructor is awful Keeps telling me I'm not gonna pass :(
- My Parkour Instructor is Crazy He really drives me up the wall!
- Me: *quietly cracking open a cold beer* Driving instructor: "what was that?"
- An important rule my driving instructor told me Don't Texan drive.
- A few weeks ago, my driving instructor said to me "I'm thinking..."
Driving Instructors Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about driving instructors you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean driving school jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make driving instructors pranks.
A man went skydiving for the first time. "It's easy," said the instructor.
"Just count to five and pull on the main c**...," the instructor continued. "If that doesn't open, count to ten and pull on the reserve c**...."
"Super easy," he concluded. "Then you'll float slowly to the ground, and our bus will be there to drive you back to the airport."
The man jumped out the plane, and pulled on the main c**.... Nothing happened. He pulled on the reserve c**.... Nothing happened.
He looked down at the ground which was approaching fast, and said: "I bet that bus won't be there to pick me up either."
A young man is taking a driving test
The instructor describes a situation: "You're driving along and suddenly there are two people in front of you. A bit to the left there's an old hag and a bit to the right there's a beautiful young woman. Your car can't make it between them. What do you do?"
The young man says: "Well I'll go for the old hag."
The instructor shakes his head and says: "Really? You won't hit the brakes?"
Two truck driving brothers.
Two truck driving brothers are taking a driving test, and the instructor asks, "You're driving the truck and you're at the top of a mountain and your brakes go out. You notice an accident at the bottom of the mountain, what do you do?"
The trucker replies, "The first thing I do is wake up my brother."
"What good is that going to do?" the instructor asks.
The trucker replies, "In all of the years we've been driving he ain't never seen an accident like the one we're about to get in to."
I confess: I've m**... myself while driving.
And that was the only time my driving instructor had to stop the car.
My hot driving instructor said "Look where you want to go"
Apparently staring at her c**... wasn't what she meant...
A blonde was going for a driving test for her license but was nervous as she'd failed 8 times before. After talking with her blonde friends they came up with a sure-fire plan. She was to pick a man as the driving instructor, and to use s**... as a bargaining tactic in exchange for passing her
She came back disappointed though, she failed.
What happened? her friends asked.
When I was s**... him off, I crashed
A new driver is driving down the road...
He stops at a stop sign. After a while, his instructor yells at him, saying "Why aren't you accelerating, you have the right of way?!" The driver responds "I was waiting for the sign to turn green."
Driver instructor teaching a woman how to drive
Instructor : you're driving on the road and suddenly your husband, son and daughter cross the street, what do you step on?
Woman : i step on my husband
Instructor : no, this is third time i tell you "step on the brakes!"
Driving test...
Friend: I just gave my driving test.
I: Did u pass it?
Friend: I don't know... I'm waiting for the instructor to return from the trauma center.
I took my driving test the other day ....
When the instructor told me I'd failed I told him I hadn't seen this coming. He said "You should have read the signs".
A police officer said to a motorist, "What were you doing? Your car was zigzagging like crazy!" "I'm learning to drive."
"Without an instructor in the car?"
"Oh, yes. It's an online course."
What do you call an Old Witch that refuses to turn herself into a one-way lane...
my driving instructor.
My driving instructor is a civil rights activist
Her driving course is called Rosa Parks cars