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Driving Jokes

186 driving jokes and hilarious driving puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about driving that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Whether you're looking for a good laugh or a way to break the ice at a party, these driving jokes are sure to tickle your funny bone. From jokes about driving test woes to humorous quips about driving instructors, carpooling and more, this article has plenty of jokes about anyone's favorite vehicle. Get ready to drive your friends and family crazy with these hilarious driving jokes.

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Funniest Driving Short Jokes

Short driving jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The driving humour may include short drove jokes also.

  1. My Tinder bio says that I have a corner office with views of the entire city, drive a $500,000 vehicle, and that I'm paid to travel. My dates never seem too happy when I tell them I'm a bus driver.
  2. What do you call a drunk guy trying to start his car? A lyft. Friends don't let friends drive drunk.
  3. As I was driving past a prison yesterday, I saw a dwarf scaling down the wall. Confused , I stared up at him and he sneered back. And I thought to myself, "well that's a little condescending."
  4. While driving to work, robbers jumped into my car and stole everything. They were pirates of the car I be in.
  5. My Tinder bio says I have a corner office with views of the entire city, drive a $500,000 vehicle, and I'm paid to travel My dates are always upset when I tell them I'm a bus driver
  6. With the rise of self-driving vehicles... With the rise of self-driving vehicles, it's only a matter of time before we get a country song where a guy's truck leaves him too
  7. I was crossing the street when I suddenly noticed my ex getting run over by a bus. I thought to myself, Wow! That could have been me! Then I remembered I can't drive a bus.
  8. With the way I see asian people driving, it got me thinking... Pearl Harbor might have been an accident.
  9. Please becareful on the road Lots of people are drinking excessively and having their wives drive
  10. What kind of car does Jesus drive? A Christler. Oh no. Wait.. He drove a Honda.
    But he didn't like talking about it.
    John 12:49 :
    > For I did not speak of my own Accord.

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Driving One Liners

Which driving one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with driving? I can suggest the ones about learning to drive and driven.

  1. A lion would never drive while drunk. But a tiger wood.
  2. Why does spiderman hate driving with his evil twin? Because he's a bad parallel Parker
  3. I wanted to learn how to drive a stick shift. But I couldn't find a manual.
  4. What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide and drives your girlfriend wild? A $100 bill.
  5. My friend text me 'what are you doing now?' I replied 'Probably failing my driving test'.
  6. Which actor drives the least? Christopher Walken
  7. What car does Jesus drive? A Christler
    I'm so sorry...
  8. Apparently I snore so loudly that I scare everyone in the car I'm driving.
  9. When a BMW owner learns to drive... What kind of car do they switch to?
  10. If you heat your solid state drive into a gaseous state drive, do you get cloud storage?
  11. Him: "I drive like lightning" Her: "So you drive fast?" Him: "No, I hit trees."
  12. What ruined Tiger Woods' golf career? His driving game.
  13. Women are like snowflakes... They can't drive.
  14. I wanted to learn to drive a stick shift. Thing is, I couldn't find a manual.
  15. Asians are sooo bad at driving.... I'm starting to think Pearl Harbor was an accident.

Driving Cars Jokes

Here is a list of funny driving cars jokes and even better driving cars puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Microsoft is working on software for self-driving vehicles. I can't wait until my car suddenly stops in the middle of the highway and reboots to install updates.
  • Cop pulls over bad driver Cop- sir do you realize how badly you were switching lanes?
    Guy- sorry officer, I'm drunk af
    Cop-that's not a valid reason to let your girlfriend drive the car
  • I've already got a car, but I want to have a DeLorean as well. I would drive my first car every day, but only drive the DeLorean from time to time.
  • It really probably isn't safe for me to be driving my car right now, But hey, bad brakes have never stopped me before.
  • They finally figured out why the computerized self driving car has crashed... They didn't install the driver.
  • To all of you idiots out there that drive loud cars, we hate you and get off our roads. We don't care how many heart attack victims you have to take to the hospital.
  • I saw a car with a bumper sticker saying "I am a vet, therefore I can drive like an animal." Suddenly, I realized how many proctologists there are on the roads.
  • What kind of car does a Weeaboo drive? A Nii-san
  • i got complimented on my driving earlier they left a note on the car saying parking fine
  • With self-driving cars it won't be long before we have country songs where your truck leaves you too.

Driving Down The Road Jokes

Here is a list of funny driving down the road jokes and even better driving down the road puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • In the US people drive on the right side of the road, but here in Atlanta we drive on what's left.
  • Cop: You're driving on the wrong side of the road. Driver: Sorry, I'm English
    Cop: (shouting) Oii.. It's the rong soid of the roade ye was droivin down, innit?
  • My British friend asked me, "Why do you Americans drive on the wrong side of the road?" I told him, "Dude, we literally drive on the right side."
  • Driving down the road and saw my ex. It's funny how I'd hit that changes meaning over the years.
  • It makes my heart race when my GF puts her head in my lap during long road trips So now I only let her do it when it's my turn to drive
  • A magician was driving down the road when suddenly... He turned into a driveway!
  • Why don't pirates drive on mountain roads? 'Scurvy
  • I was surprised to learn my kid failed the road driving test... ...she Tweeted three times that it seem to be going well.
  • While driving down the road, two robbers jumped into my car and stole everything. They were pirates of the car I be in.
  • They told me to drive it like I stole it So I stayed at the speed limit, followed the road rules and paid attention to my surroundings
Driving joke, They told me to drive it like I stole it

Woman Driving Jokes

Here is a list of funny woman driving jokes and even better woman driving puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I saw a woman driving with her hazards on. And I thought to myself, "At least she's honest."
  • Smoking I saw a woman smoking with her baby in the car and it made me feel disgusted with the world we live in.
    Who lets a woman drive?
  • So I was driving home from work tonight, I saw a woman texting whilst driving. It infuriated me so much I threw my beer bottle at her car.
  • It's disgraceful that in 2020 the train-driving profession is overwhelmingly male-dominated. Surely it's... a woman's right to choo-choos.
  • Whats the difference between a woman and a dog? Put them both in the trunk of your car, drive around the block, and see which ones happy to see you afterwards.
  • Whenever I see a woman driving a bus I smile and think about how far we as a society have come in Equality And then I wait for the next bus.
  • A man runs over a woman in his car. Who's fault is it? The man's, he shouldn't drive in the kitchen.
  • Why can't Helen Keller drive.... Because she's a woman.
  • With women being able to drive in Saudi Arabia, they will open a woman-only taxi service. It'll be called NiCab.
  • "He drives a 300k vehicle. He must be rich." Woman: So what do you do for a living?
    Man: I drive a bus.

Drinking And Driving Jokes

Here is a list of funny drinking and driving jokes and even better drinking and driving puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I had a few drinks last night so I left my car and took a bus instead Turns out I can't drive a bus very well when I'm drunk either
  • The dent "I noticed you've got a dent on your car?"
    "Yeah."
    "Oh. Did you drink too much last evening?"
    "Yes, I did."
    "I see. So your wife had to drive you home?"
    "Exactly."
  • Beer has female hormones Whenever I am drinking I talk too much and can't drive a car.
  • I've discovered that alcohol contains female hormones After drinking you can't drive, you never stop talking and have to sit while peeing.
  • I never drink and drive I do my drinking before driving
  • Two guys at a bar, one says "My wife drives me to drink." The other says "You're lucky, my wife makes me walk."
  • Why couldn't the golf club get a drink at the bar? Because it would be driving later
  • Hey everyone be careful on the road this holiday because there are a lot of people drinking And their wives are driving
  • They tried to combine a networked hard drive with a device that brewed drinks... It was NAS-tea
  • Be careful on the roads tonight Lots of people will be drinking excessively and letting their wives drive. Recipe for disaster.

Driving Test Jokes

Here is a list of funny driving test jokes and even better driving test puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • My mate phoned me and asked what I was doing. "Probably failing my driving test," I replied.
  • My mate just rang me and said "what are you doing at the moment?" I said, "probably failing my driving test."
  • Why did Chewbacca fail his driving test? He made a few Wookiee errors.
  • my mate rang me earlier.... My mate rang me earlier and says "Hey dude, what you up to?" "Probably failing my driving test" I say
  • Why'd the alternate universe Spider-Man do so well on his driving test? He's an excellent parallel Parker.
  • I got invited to test a new car made entirely of spare computer parts It was a hard drive
  • I got 8 out of 10 in my driving test. 2 guys jumped out to safety.
  • My friend told me he'd failed his driving test for running over a rabbit I said they couldn't fail you for that, he said they can when it's in the butcher's window.
  • I got to test the new self driving prototype, the Ford Dixie But it crashed and I can't get the police to help. They hang up every time after I tell them "My Dixie wrecked"
  • Driving I failed my driver's test today. The instructor asked me "What do you do at a red light?" I said "I usually check my emails and see what people are up to on Facebook."
Driving joke, Driving

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about driving can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of driving puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Driving Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter

What funny jokes about driving you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean riding in car jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make driving prank.

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants

Bartender: "Why do you have a steering wheel in your pants?"
Pirate: "Arrrr, it's driving me nuts!"

It's a miracle!

An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut.
The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. He says, "Sir, have you been drinking?"
"Just water," says the priest.
The trooper says, "Then why do I smell wine?"
The priest looks at the bottle and says,
"Good Lord! He's done it again!"

Tribal Wisdom

So a cowboy is riding along a trail in the old west and sees an Indian lying on his stomach with his ear to the ground. As he gets closer he hears the Indian saying to himself "Wagon...two gray horses...two passengers, man and woman...man driving" The cowboy goes "Wow! you can tell all that by just putting your ear to the ground?" The Indian replies "No. Wagon pass half hour ago, run me over."

Corniest joke I know.

Two friars decide to open up a business selling flowers in LA. They settup a booth right outside of Hugh Hefners p**... mansion. After about a week, their business wasnt going so well and it was also driving away people from the p**... mansion seeing two friars outside.
Eventually Hugh Hefner himself came out and put a stop to all of this.
The point of the story is: Only Hugh can prevent florist friars.
Badum psh

An old married couple are driving down the road.

They run over a mama skunk and the wife insists that they go back and pick up the baby skunk.
She says to her husband, "The poor thing is freezing."
"Put him between your legs and warm him up." is the husband's reply.
"But what about the smell?" she asks.
The husband says, "Just hold his little nose and he should be fine."

As she watches the news, an elderly woman calls her husband in concern.

She knows he is driving home, so she calls his cell phone.
"Dear, please be careful on the road today! I just heard on the radio that there is a driver going the wrong way down the highway."
Her husband replies, "Oh, it's not just one. There are hundreds of them!"

A man finds a penguin on the road...

A man finds a penguin on the road side. Thinking the penguin is lost the man takes it, drives until finding a police officer and asks what to do.
- Take it to the zoo replies the officer.
One week latter the policer officer sees the man driving with the penguin by his side.
What are you doing with that penguin ? I told you to bring him to the zoo.
I did exactly that. He loved it and now we are going to the movies .

Two priests are out driving one day..

when they get pulled over by a police officer.
The cop approaches the priests vehicle and says to the driver
"Sorry to pull you over father, but we're looking for a couple of child molesters"
The two priests look at each other for a few moments and have a few quiet words to each other. The driver turns back to the cop and says;
"Alright officer, we'll do it"

I hate when I'm driving and I see people text and drive.

It makes me want to throw my beer can at them.

A man is driving his car when suddenly the door of a parked car is swung open in front of him.

He proceeds to smash into the door of the car, ripping it off. He stops to see another man, in a very expensive suit, jump out of the car and scream at him "you just ripped the door off my lovely Porsche!".
The first man says "You are so materialistic...you didn't even notice that you left arm was ripped off in the accident".
The second man looks down for a second, then screams "my Rolex!"

A Paladin takes his car to a mechanic

A Paladin takes his car to a mechanic. "Whenever I'm driving, I get these strange urges to run over pedestrians."
The mechanic has a look under the car. "Your alignment is off."

I saw a lady texting and driving today

I was furious. I rolled down my window, and threw my beer at her.

A blond is driving to DisneyLand...

She sees a sign saying "DisneyLand left" so she turns around and drives home.

My driving instructor told me to pull over somewhere safe.

Two minutes later he said, "Why haven't you pulled over yet?"
I said, "Because we're still in Manchester."

As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his cell phone rang.

Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "My dear husband, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Interstate 10. Please be careful!"
"Heck," said the husband, "It's not just one car. It's hundreds of them!"

A drunk guy calls a radio station...

...and tells the RJ,"I found this purse outside Raven's club. It has 1500 dollars in cash, a credit card, an iPhone 6s, and a driving license with Rebecca's name on it."
The RJ asks in an impressed tone,"It was good of you to call us. Do you need my help contacting her so that you can return the purse?"

"No. I just wanted to request a sad song for Rebecca."

A pirate walks into a bar...

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his c**.... The bartender looks at the steering wheel and asks, "Doesn't that bother you?" The pirate responds, "Yar it's driving me nuts."

Pedro was driving down a street when...

Pedro was driving down the Panjim street in a swift because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place.
Looking up to heaven he said, "Lord take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of my life and give up my whiskey. I will give up gambling and womanising too!!"
Miraculously, a parking place appeared.
Pedro looked up again and said," Never mind, I found one ! Sorry I bothered you !!"

An old man is in his Volvo driving home from work...

... when his wife rings him on his cellphone.
"Honey", she says in a worried voice, "be careful. There was a bit on the news just now; some lunatic is driving the wrong way down the freeway".
"It's worse than that!", he replies, "There are hundreds of them!"

Today i realised why my Dad divorced my mom

I saw her driving license. she has an F in s**...

Deep sleep prevents aging.

Especially when you are driving.

A couple finds a wounded skunk on the road. 'Where do I put it?' the lady asks...

A man and a woman are driving along when they see a wounded skunk on the side of the road. They stop, the woman gets out, picks it up, and brings it into the car.
She says, Look, it's shivering … it must be cold. What should I do?
He says, Put it between your legs.
She says, What about the smell?
He says, Hold its nose.

If I were a farmer, how would I measure my height?

From my head, tomatoes.
Hope no one has heard this before, thought of it while driving.

Two priests are out driving and get pulled over

The cop approaches the priests vehicle and says to the driver Sorry to pull you over father, but we're looking for a couple of child molesters
The two priests look at each other for a few moments and have a few quiet words to each other. The driver turns back to the cop and says—
Alright officer, we'll do it

A Texas farmer was touring England. He happened to meet an English farmer and asked him, "What size farm do you have?"

The Englishman proudly announced, "Thirty-five acres!"
"Thirty-five acres?" the Texan scoffed. "Why, I can get in my truck at 8:00 AM and start driving and at noon, I am still on my farm. I can eat lunch and start driving again and at 5:00 PM I am still on my farm.
"Ah, yes," the Englishman nodded in understanding. "I had a truck like that once."

My dad and i were driving past a cemetery

When suddenly my dad said in a serious toned voice
"I know something you don't know about this place.The people living in this town aren't allowed to be buried in here"
And i was really confused so i asked why and he said
"Because they are still alive."
Original: tumblr user @hello.

I'm not gonna make fun of my grandfather's driving skills anymore.

Apparently parking zones disease is a real thing.

Some guy was yelling at me today, complaining about my driving, saying I shouldn't be allowed on the highway…

I'll play golf wherever I want!

On my way home from work saw a man texting while driving..

Knowing how dangerous this can be I pulled up next to him, rolled down my window and threw my beer at him.

My crush told me that I was like a brother to her while we were in the car...

We were driving to New York at the time, and about halfway up the east coast she told me I was like a brother to her. She was surprised when I proceeded to turn the car around and drive the other way without even acting phased. She asked "where are we going now?" My only answer was "Alabama."

A Driver gets Pulled Over

A man driving home from the bar gets pulled over by a police officer.
Officer: "Do you know why I pulled you over?"
Driver: "I'm guessing you think I was drunk driving."
Officer: "Tell you what, my shift is ending so if you can spell the alphabet backwards, I'll let you go."
Driver: (very quickly) "ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA."
Officer: "Wow, I couldn't do that sober."
Driver: "Me neither."

A guy walks into a bar...

A guy walks into a bar.
the bartender asks, "what can I get you?"
The patron responds, "just a fruit punch for me, I'm driving"
The bartender says, "great, but you have to get in line."
The patron stops and looks around only to reply, "I don't see a punchline..."

An Irish priest is driving along a country road when a police man pulls him over.

He immediately smells alcohol on the priest's breath and notices an empty wine bottle in the car.
He says: "Have you been drinking?"
"Just water," says the priest.
The cop replies: "Then why do I smell wine?"
The priest looks at the bottle and says: "Good Lord! He's done it again!"

A college professor is driving home drunk one Saturday night....

When he gets pulled over. The cop comes up to his window and asks him:
"Excuse me sir, you were speeding, you ran a red light and you appear to be drunk, where are you going?"
The professor replies: "I am currently on my way to a lecture concerning the dangers of drinking, smoking and staying up late."
The police officer says: "Who could possibly be giving that kind of lecture at this time?"
The professor responds: "My wife."

Don't you hate it when you're driving along smoking a cigarette, you flick it out the window and you drive for a couple more miles and smell something funny and you look over onto the back seat and sure enough..

Grandma's f**... herself again

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel coming out of the front of his pants.

The bartender looks up and says "Hey Pirate, you've a got a steering wheel coming out of the front of your pants!"
The pirate says "Argh, it's driving me nuts."

m**... while looking in a mirror isn't wrong.

Unless it's a rear view mirror, and you're driving a school bus

Why was everyone in the Soviet Union so good at driving manual?

Because they were afraid of Stalin.

Why is everyone obsessed with that new horror movie?

Like, i was driving today and this is the third time someone has rolled down their window and yelled to me: Hey! Watch It!

A old man was driving down the freeway when his wife called his cell phone.

"Herbert, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Route 280. Please be careful!"
"It's not just one car," said Herbert, "It's hundreds of them!"

I was once driving down the road..

..where I read a sign which said,
Speed limit 30km
I slowed down to 30km/h
A little further, another one
Speed limit 20km
I had to slow down even more,
Moving on, I saw another one
Speed limit 10km
My speedometer had come down to 10km/h
Not long after that, there was another
Speed limit 1km
I pulled over and started pushing my car to a point where I finally saw the last sign,
Welcome to Speed Limit

Two priests are driving down a road when they are pulled over by the cops.

The cop shines a light in their faces and signals to the driver to roll down his window.
"We're searching for two child molesters," he says.
The driver leans over to the other priest and they whisper between themselves.
Finally, he turns back to the policeman. "Ok. We'll do it."

Just remember, voting is like driving!

D to go forward, R to go in reverse.

7 year old daughter was looking at mom's driving licence and saw s**...:F and started laughing

She then said you must. be so bad at s**... to get an F no wonder dad's with the maid all the time

A 7 year old girl

A 7 year old girl was looking at her mother's driving license card. It was written " s**...: F", she then started laughing until the mother asked why she was laughing. The girl said " I can't believe you are so bad at s**... that you got an F. Now i understand why daddy is always with the maid.

Another blonde joke

Boyfriend is driving down the street with his (blonde) girlfriend in the passenger seat. The boyfriend becomes concerned the turn signals are not working, so he asks his girlfriend to poke her head out the passenger side window to see if the right turn signal is functioning. She replies, "it's working, it's not working, it's working.."

With the rise of self driving vehicles,

we shall soon hear a country song about a guy's truck leaving him too.

A school teacher in Hyderabad was once asked, "Can you make a sentence without using 'E'?"

"I doubt I can. It's a major part of many many words. Omitting it is as hard as making muffins without flour. It's as hard as spitting without saliva, napping without a pillow, driving a train without tracks, sailing to Russia without a boat, washing your hands without soap. And, anyway, what would I gain? An award? A cash bonus? Bragging rights? Why should I strain my brain? It's not worth it."

Otto the German was driving from Germany to Paris to visit some relatives.

A French cop stops him and asks the usual questions:
cop: name?
Otto: Otto
cop: address?
Otto: 341 Brandenburg Street, Berlin
cop: Occupation?
Otto: no, just visiting...

A blonde was driving on the way to disneyland.

She came to an intersection and stopped, she saw a sign that read, 'Disneyland Left'. So she pulled a U-turn, cried and drove home.

I ran my car into a pole late last night

The worst part was the awful sound it made, but I don't speak polish so I just kept driving

A man is driving down the freeway

when his wife calls him. He picks up and asks what the matter is. She says, "I want you to be careful honey, I heard on the radio there's a lunatic barreling down the highway going the wrong way." He replies, "it's much worse than that, there's hundreds of them

Now that vehicles are driving themselves...

It won't be long until a country singer writes a song about their truck leaving them too.

My grandfather is really frustrated that he has to use the chair lift to go upstairs.

It is driving him up the wall.

An elderly man was driving down the highway when his phone rang.

It was his wife urgently warning him: Honey, I just heard on the news that there's some lunatic in a car going the wrong way on the highway. Please be careful!
It's worse than that, said the man, It's not just one car. It's hundreds of them!

A trucker stops at a red light and a blonde catches up to him.

She knocks on the window and says, "Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load."
The trucker just ignores her, the light changes, and he proceeds down the street.
At the next light, the blonde again catches up and says, "Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load."
He ignores her again and continues down the street.
At the next red light the blonde catches up, all out of breath, knocks on the window and says, "Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load."
The trucker looks at her and finally, he says, "Hi, my name is Kevin, it's snowing, and I'm driving a salt truck."

A man runs out of petrol

A MAN was driving down the road and ran out of petrol. At that moment, a bee flew in his window.
"What seems to be the problem?'' asked the bee.
"I'm out of petrol,'' the man replied.
The bee told the man to wait right there and flew away. Minutes later, the man watched as an entire swarm of bees flew to his car and into his petrol tank.
After a few minutes, the bees flew out.
`"Try it now,'' said the bee.
The man turned the ignition key and the car started right up.
"Wow,'' the man exclaimed. "What did you put in my petrol tank?''
"BP,'' answered the bee.

A man was driving down the road when a policeman stopped him. The officer looked in the back of the man's truck and said, Why are these penguins in your truck?

The man replied, These are my penguins. They belong to me.
You need to take them to the zoo, the policeman said.
The next day, the officer saw the same guy driving down the road. He pulled him over again. He saw the penguins were still in the truck, but they were wearing sunglasses this time. I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo! the officer said.
I did, the man replied. And today I'm taking them to the beach.

A cop sees a car driving slowly and wiggly, changing lanes for no reason and so on

He pulls the car over, a man and a woman sit in it.
Cop: "I had to pull you over, you can't drive like that!"
Man: "I'm sorry, I've drank a little bit to much..."
Cop: "That's not an excuse to let your wife drive!"

Two English tourists were driving through Wales.At Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwyllllantysiliogogogoch they stopped for lunch they asked the waitress: Before we order, I wonder if you could settle an argument.Can you pronounce where we are,very,very,slowly?"

The girl leaned over and said:
Burrr… gurrr… King.

I was driving with my dad when we passed a cemetery. My dad goes in a low, dark, creepy voice, "I know something about this cemetery that you don't. And I was like what is it? He continued, "The people living in this town can't be buried here. I was really confused so I asked why?

He rasped, "Cuz they're still alive!"

In celebration of my very first Cake Day, I'm reposting one of my own jokes:

A truck loaded with Worcestershire sauce is driving through Saskatoon, Saskatchewan when it collides with a Nissan Qashqai.
The truck then careens down the road and hits a car from Massachusetts, injuring the two otorhinolaryngologists inside. One of them, suffering from Schistosomiasis, has a myocardial infarction.
A bystander witnesses the entire event and quickly calls to report the accident on his Huawei.
The emergency operator asks the bystander, "What happened?"
"It's hard to say."

Joke translated to English from German

A blonde is driving home when she gets pulled over by a police officer.
"Mam, may i see you driving license?!"
"What's a driving license? "
"You know this thing in your purse with your face on..."
She starts digging through her purse, finds her cosmetic mirror, and hands it over to the policeman.
The policeman takes a look at the mirror and responds-
"Should have told me right away your a police officer too "

A penguin is driving to the mall...

All of a sudden his engine starts running really rough, and smoke is coming from under the hood. Luckily, there's an auto repair shop right next to the mall, so he pulls in there. The mechanic says he'll be glad to take a look, but he won't be able to get to it for a couple hours. The penguin says fine, and walks across the street to the mall.
He kills time walking around the mall, does some window shopping, buys an ice cream cone, etc. Finally the two hours are up and he goes back to the mechanic.
The penguin says, "Have you had time to look at my engine?"
The mechanic says, "Yeah, it looks like you blew a seal."
The penguin says, "No, that's just ice cream."

A man named Jeff was driving down the road when a policeman stopped him.

The officer looked in the back of Jeff's truck and said, Why are these penguins in your truck?

Jeff replied, These are my penguins. They belong to me.

You need to take them to the zoo, the policeman said.

The next day, the officer saw Jeff driving down the road once again. He pulled him over again. He saw the penguins were still in the truck, but they were wearing sunglasses this time. I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo! the officer said.

I did, Jeff replied. And today I'm taking them to the beach."

A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down.

AAA (Antarctic Automobile Assn) tows it to the garage in the nearest town, where the mechanic says he has time to look at it, give him half an hour.
The penguin wanders down the street to an ice cream shop and decides to beat the heat with a cone of his favorite flavor, vanilla. Of course, being a penguin, with flippers instead of hands, as well as a beak, he makes a huge mess and gets ice cream all over his face. h**... goes back to the garage, where the mechanic tells him "looks like you blew a seal."
"No," says the penguin. "That's just ice cream."

Two nuns are driving through Transylvania when suddenly, out of nowhere, a vampire jumps on their windshield

The nuns panic and the one driving starts swerving the car to try knock him off, to no avail.
"Quick! Quick! Show him your cross! Show him your cross!", shouts the one nun.
The other nun looks at the vampire and shouts:
"Get the f\*\*k off the windshield!!"

Where are we?

Not mine:
Two tourists were driving through Wisconsin. As they were approaching Oconomowoc, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter, one tourist asked the blonde employee. "Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are... very slowly? The blonde girl leaned over the counter and said, Burrrrrr, gerrrrrr, Kiiiing."

Driving joke, Where are we?

jokes about driving

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these driving jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.