The Best 70 Draw Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Draw jokes. There are some draw sketch jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these draw pens puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 Funniest Draw Jokes and Puns
Why do North Koreans draw lines so well?
They have a Supreme Ruler.
What do you call a woman who can't draw?
Tracy
Jimmy approached his teacher
After looking at the syllabus for their next lesson on graphing, Jimmy approached his teacher with a stern look on his face and said, I'll do algebra, I'll do trig, I'll even do statistics, but graphing is where I draw the line!
I once knew a bald guy who liked to draw rabbits on his head
but from a distance they looked like hares
I used to think my drawings made me autistic...
it turns out my Grandma was just from Boston.
Three Priest are deciding what to do with the church donations for the week
One priest suggests that they draw a circle, throw all the money in tha air and whatever lands inside the circle they give to God. The second priest suggests that they draw a circle, throw the money in the air, and whatever lands outside of the circle they give to God. The third priest suggests that they simply throw the money into the air, and whatever God wants he takes.
Two dogs are at the vet talking.
Two dogs are at the vet talking.
Great Dane: So what are you here for?
Poodle: Well I've been wandering around the neighborhood too much lately looking for sex so they're having me castrated, you?
Great Dane: My mistress does the housework naked, she was bending over cleaning the vegetable draw in the fridge and I just couldn't help myself so I went for it.
Poodle: So you're here for castration too hey?
Great Dane: No, I'm here to get my claws trimmed.
Why does the nurse always carry a red pen while at work?
To draw blood.
Did you hear about the fractal that was murdered in the street?
It took police forever to draw the chalk outline.
Little Johnny puts a dot on the blackboard (NSFW)
The teacher in her first grade class asks her students to come to the chalkboard and draw something that causes a lot of excitement and commotion. Little Johnny comes up and simply puts a dot on the chalkboard. The teacher asks "what is that?" Little Johnny replies, "it's a period." The teacher says "why does it cause excitement and commotion?" Little Johnny says "it doesn't, but my sister said she missed one this morning and my mom fainted, my dad had a heart attack, and the guy next door shot himself"
New drinking game! Draw a card. If it's black take a shot.
I call it the Ferguson
You can explore draw chalk reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean draw duel dad jokes. There are also draw puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
How do you make a room darker with a pencil?
Draw the curtains.
The Artist
I just saw a group of people who were watching an artist sketch all of them in his book. The man was good too, he really knew how to draw a crowd.
I, too, went to a mixed religion seminar...
...But in the hopes of learning more about charity. First I asked a Buddhist monk: "How do you decide what to give away and what to keep for yourself?" "Child's play", he said. "I draw a small circle in the ground, throw my money into the air, and what falls outside of the circle I give to Buddha". Next I asked a catholic priest. "Easy my son", he told me. "All I do is draw a small circle in earth, throw my money to the heavens, and what falls into the circle I give to God". Finally, I asked a Rabbi. "Simple!" he answered. "I throw my money into the air and what god wants, he takes!"
The teacher asks all the students to draw something on the board that's exciting...
All the other kids draw rockets, jet planes, roller coasters, and so on. But little Johnny goes up to the board, draws a dot, and sits down.
The teacher says "Johnny, there's nothing exciting about a dot. How can a dot cause excitement?"
Johnny replies "That's not a dot, it's a period, and my sister just missed hers, and it's causing a lot of excitement at our house!"
Why does a blonde nurse carry around a red pen?
To draw blood.
Why do school nurses bring a red crayon to work?
So they can draw blood
A man arrived to a Duel with only a pen and a piece of paper
He proceeded to draw his weapon
It was time to name Canada
All the 4 founding hosiers were sitting around and no one could agree on a name. They finally decided to put a bunch of letters in a hat and 3 people would draw one out at a time while the last transcribed the name.
The first guy drew and read, "C, eh?"
The next drew, "N, eh?"
Finally the last maple head drew and said, "D, eh?"
I went to an art contest recently...
It ended in a draw.
A man showed up for a duel armed only with a pencil and paper.
He then proceeded to draw his weapon.
A teacher asks class to draw and colour a duck holding an umbrella
She notices Jerry colouring his duck blue and asks "where did you see a blue duck?" He replies "where did you see a duck holding an umbrella?"
I had a friend who used to draw on her eyebrows.
One day, she accidentally drew them to high. When I told her, she looked surprised.
I'll do algebra, I'll do trigonometry, I'll even do statistics...
But graphing is where I draw the line!
Actually, graphing is fine, but calculus is my limit.
A gruff looking guy approached me on the street saying he can draw my portrait for $2
It sounds sketchy
Why does the blonde nurse take a red pen to work?
In case she has to draw blood.
How do you draw the most realistic fish?
It must be drawn to scale.
I watched a soccer game that ended in a 1-1 draw...
No 1-1
You know that famous painter Rorschach?
Why does he only draw dicks?
When Canada was first founded, its leaders were having trouble coming up with a name.
Unable to come up with any ideas, they decided the best course of action would be to draw random letters out of a hat.
One man pulled out a letter, cleared his throat, and read,
"C, eh."
The letter was written down. The man pulled out another letter and read,
"N, eh."
This, too, was recorded. The man drew one more letter and read,
"D, eh."
Fullmetal Alchemist is so unrealistic
I mean how can they draw such perfect circles?
When Canada was first unified, they realized they needed a name for this new country, so they decided to draw letters oot of a basket to name it.
The first prime minister went up on stage and started pulling letters and announcing them to the crowd. "C, eh?"..."N, eh?"..."D, eh?"
Does anyone know how to draw a very realistic bullet?
Because I'm drawing a blank.
What's the toughest thing for an artist to draw?
A salary.
(Credit to u/arguablytrue)
Three priests gathered together for a drink .
During their get together ,the host ask the other two :
- How do you split your money with the Lord ?
"I draw a line on the floor in my church ,then ,i throw the money in the air ,whatever is on my side I get to keep ,whatever falls on his side he keeps it" sais the first priest.
The second one replies "well I draw circle and then I' throw the money in the air ,whatever falls inside the circle is mine ,whatever Falls outside the circle is His" .
"How do you split your money ?" they both ask the host priest.
I' just throw the money in the air and he keeps whatever he wants.
I was drawing a graph for my report expecting a straight line. But I got a curve.
What a plot twist
I like math for the most part...
But graphing is where I draw the line.
My therapist said the best treatment for depression is to vigorously rub salt into my skin in order to draw out excess moisture.
Wow thanks I'm cured.
I'm okay with smoking, alcohol, and marijuana.
But cocaine is where I draw the line.
Why do North Koreans draw the straightest lines?
Because they have a supreme ruler
I'm fine with alchohol, cigarettes and marijuana
But coccaine is where I draw the line
My older brother always tore the last pages of my comic books, and never told me why.
I had to draw my own conclusions.
An artist has a 6 year old child who also likes to draw
His child drew a horse.
The artist asked, "You drew the horse wrongly."
The child replied, "How did I draw it wrongly?"
The artist said, "Why does the horse have wings?"
The child replied, "Why can't it have wings?"
The artist said, "It isn't a horse if it has wings."
The child replied, "Then why did you call it a horse?"
I feel like most drugs are ok.
But cocaine is where I draw the line.
I wanted to make a joke about people that do drugs
But that's where I draw the line
My uncle swore to me that if i wanted to attract girls, I mean REALLY draw in the chicks, I should roll up a sock and put it in my pants.
I did this at a high school dance, and I when I got home, he asked me if I tried it and did it work. I told him it did not help at all, and only made things worse. He looked down and said, Well you were supposed to put it in the FRONT!
I don't see why some people use fractions instead of decimals
It's pointless, but anyway you gotta draw the line somewhere or else people will think you're being irrational. But that's beside the point
Trump will still be president of The United States after January 20th
He's having Rudy draw up the paperwork to form The United States Total Landscaping Co. as we speak!
Whenever my artist girlfriend is sad I let her draw things on my body.
I gave her a shoulder to crayon.
Recently I've been learning how to draw optical illusions so I can surprise my girlfriend with one on her birthday.
Unfortunately she walked in and caught me practicing the other day.
Her: "What's that!"
Me: "I can explain...it's not what it looks like!"
Used to know this guy who always tried to draw attention to the fact he was half-horse.
Never could stop being the centaur of attention.
Why are artists so good at self control?
Because they always know where to draw the line.
The other day I got lost in the Jungle, but luckily I had a compass with me...
So I was able to draw perfect circles with a pencil.
I'll do algebra, I'll do trigonometry, I'll even do statistics.
But graphing is where I draw the line!
All the comic books I inherited from my older brother had their last pages missing.
I had to draw my own conclusions.
What do you call a Norse god who doesn't draw much attention to themselves?
Low Key.......!
y=mx+b jokes are great...
but at some point we'll have to draw the line.
Jokes about y = mx + c are great...
But at some point, you've got to draw the line
Why do nurses like red crayons?
Because they often have to draw blood!
Why did the nurse need a red pen at work?
Why did the nurse need a red pen at work?
In case she needed to draw blood.
Why do nurses like red crayons?
Sometimes they have to draw blood
I'll shotgun a beer, rip a bong, munch some shrooms...
But cocaine is where I draw the line.
I like math as much as the next guy...
...But I draw the line at fractions!
My uncle has a horse that's a very good artist!
He can only draw carriages, carts, and wagons, but that's good for a horse...
Why did the nurse carry a red marker with her?
In case she had to draw blood.
What do an artist and a phlebotomist have in common?
They both know how to draw blood.
Why did the nurse carry around a red crayon?
To draw blood
Why does a phlebotomist carry a red pen?
To draw blood!!!
I don't understand...
I don't understand people who use fractions instead of decimals.
It's pointless.
I guess you have to draw the line somewhere,
or people will think you're irrational.
If women had beards....
They would shave them off and then draw them back on.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the draw caricature jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working draw pull piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.