The Best 75 Dragon Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Dragon jokes. There are some dragon reptile jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these dragon how to train your dragon puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Dragon Jokes and Puns

How many Dragon Ball Z characters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one, but it will take three episodes.

I'd hate to be a dragon.


I'd get so angry trying to blow out my birthday candles.

How many Dragonball Z characters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Find out next time, on Dragonball Z!

Kill the Dragon

An evil and powerful dragon lives near a village.
It eats a virgin from the village every week.
No one can defeat it.

One day a hero comes and attempts to kill the dragon.
He finds that the dragon is too power to be defeated.
He decides to kill the dragon with intelligence.

Several months later, the dragon is starved to death.

jokes about dragon

Two Dragons walk into a bar

One dragon says, "It's hot in here".
"Shut your mouth", says the other dragon.


My poor town

Was attacked years ago by a terrible fire breathing dragon. Only one person made it out alive, unfortunately it was the village idiot...

Famous Last Words

Post your own. I'll start-

"Nah, thats not a dragon"

"And it looks like clear skies over Hiroshima today"

Dragon joke, Famous Last Words

What do you get when a dragon sneezes?

Out of the way.

A marijuana plantation was set on fire

witnesses claim a dragon is responsible.

Getting real sick of all the Dragon Ball Z references...

Just Saiyan...

I think three movies is a bit much for the hobbit.

Seems like they're really dragon it out.

You can explore dragon debit reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean dragon kraken dad jokes. There are also dragon puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


What's Hitler's favorite Yu-Gi-Oh card?

Blue-Eyes White Dragon

How does Smaug copy files to a USB stick?

Dragon drop

What do you call a Mexican woman with no legs?

Cuntswaylow

Bonus: what do you call an Asian woman with no legs?

Dragon lips

How many super saiyans does it take to change a light bulb?

Find out next time, on Dragon Ball Z!

I bought my retarded son a Komodo dragon, but for safety reasons we keep him in his cage.

Away from the Komodo dragon.

Dragon joke, I bought my retarded son a Komodo dragon, but for safety reasons we keep him in his cage.

I met a girl who said she liked Imagine Dragons.

I asked her if she could Imagine Dragon these nuts across her chin.

The characters from Dragon Ball Z aren't that super

Just saiyan

Went to take my dog with no legs for a walk in the park...

now its a dragon.


A hero comes to a village...

The villagers all looks very upset, so the hero ask what happen. "There is a huge dragon living in the mountain. Every week, it will come down and eat one of our virgin girls" the villager reply. The hero then promise to help. Two weeks later, the dragon starved to death.

There I was, risking my life to save my girlfriend from a fire-breathing dragon!! And all she had to say was..

"You have a drug problem."

Some people say that Frieza was the best character in Dragon Ball Z, but...

I think his brother was cooler.

How many dragon ball characters does it take to change a light bulb ?

Only one... but it will take a few episodes.

~~The lightbulb saga~~

Did you know LSD can make you lose weight?

Because you can't get to the fridge if there's a dragon guarding it.

I only like 2 things in a woman. 1.Blue eyes

2.White Dragon

A man throws a dollar coin into a wishing well...

and a genie pops out. The genie tells him "You have thrown the largest money value into this well since it has been built. You may have one wish."

"I want a dragon."

"Are you sure? That's... pretty big, and would probably give me away. Anything else?"

"I want to learn how to fold a fitted sheet."

"...what color dragon do you want?"

Dragon joke, A man throws a dollar coin into a wishing well...

I thought I'd lost my LSD at my Grans house.

I went around and asked her if she'd found a small see through bag when tidying up.

She told me she didn't have time to tidy up.

Not while she has to worry about that dragon guarding the fridge.

The UK Government has decided to make LSD legal as a drug for weight loss

It makes sense if you think about it. It's kinda hard to get to the fridge when there's a dragon guarding it...

Knight vs dragon

A knight is fighting a dragon. He cuts its head, but the dragon grows two new heads. The knight cuts them, but the dragon grows 4 heads. The knight cuts them, the dragon grows 8 heads. The knight cuts them, the dragon grows 16 heads. The knight cuts them, the dragon grows 32 heads. The knight cuts them, the dragon grows 64 heads. The knight cuts them, the dragon grows 128 heads. The knight cuts them and the dragon is finally dead.

It was an 8-bit dragon.


A new study has shown LSD causes new users to lose weight.

Obviously, You can eat while there's a dragon gaurding your fridge.

Son: "Dad! My lsd is missing!"

Dad: "We have bigger problems son, there's a dragon in the kitchen."

Why did Vegeta name his son Trunks?

...find out on the next episode of Dragon Ball Z

My girlfriend smokes a lot, i call her the Dragon

Because she doesn't exist

Why are dragons so good at rapping?

Because they're always spitting fire.


What would be a great way to break the ice?

An undead dragon

A knight comes to the royal castle with a bag and asks for king's attention

He enters, and says "Your Majesty, I kept my word. Here's the head of the dragon!" and takes the head of the dragon out of the bag.

A royal advisor brings a bag to the king. The king replies "Well, then, I kept my word too. Here's the hand of the princess!"

What is similar between Jon Snow and The Night King?

They have both speared a dragon.

A man rubs a bottle and a genie comes out,

The genie says to the man, "I will grant you one wish however, it must be within reason" The man thinks for a second and says "I want a dragon!" the genie replies "Are you mad? I said within reason!" Again the man thinks and finally speaks. "I wish for the ability to plug a USB cable in right every time." The genie thinks, then says,

What color do you want your dragon?

George and the Dragon

A poor vagabond, travelling a country road in England, tired and hungry, came to a roadside inn with a sign reading: "George and the Dragon." He knocked.

The innkeeper's wife stuck her head out a window. "Could ye spare some food?" he asked.

The woman glanced at his shabby clothes and obviously poor condition.

"No!" she said rather sternly.

"Could I have a pint of ale?"

"No!" she snapped again.

"Could I at least sleep in your stable?"

"No!"

By this time, she was fairly shouting.

The vagabond tried again: "Might I please...?"

"What now?" the woman interrupted impatiently.

"Do you suppose I might have a word with George instead?"

Why are dragons such good story tellers?

Because they have long tails

What's the difference between a Dragon Ball Z episode and a Markiplier video?

A *Dragon Ball Z* episode doesn't have as much screaming

So we wont see season 8 of Game of Thrones until 2019

They're really dragon it out

I wanted to change my name to Dragon Ball Z...

My friend said, "Wow, that's a lot of papers you have to fill out!"
I said "Yeah, this isn't even my final form!"

Many Chinese restaurants have names like, Golden Palace, Golden Lotus, Golden Dragon...

But mine is named after my favourite dish, Golden Retriever.

How many dragon Ball characters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

.
.
.
One, but it takes 12 episodes.

*twisting slowly*
Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.......

Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee......

Ok my 4 year old came up with this one, not sure he really understands how clever it is though... Why did the Dragon Cross the Road?

He wanted to eat some chicken.

Quality assurance engineer walks into a bar...

He orders 1 beer.
Then he orders 2 beers.
Then he orders 9999999 beers.
Then he orders -1 beer.
Then he orders a dragon.
Then he asks to buy a jdhdjsbeh

Another customer walks in, asks where the bathroom is. The bar collapses and kills everyone inside

I am glad Game of Thrones is coming to an end in 2019

I hate when TV shows dragon too long.

I don't like these Chinese New Year celebrstions

They tend to Drag-on.

A komodo dragon works security cameras at a store for other komodo dragons. Mostly, he makes sure no other dragon is spying on the customers.

He's a monitor monitor monitoring a monitor for monitoring monitors.

Did you know that LSD is a really effective weight loss drug?

How are you supposed to eat if there's a dragon guarding the fridge?

What do Bruce Lee and the Donkey from Shrek have in common?

They have both entered the dragon.

Why did the Dragonborn climb the 7000 steps?

He wanted to see what all the Fus was about.

(Credit to a youtube comment i saw)

Overheard the neighbors kid

You're on a unicorn. Behind you there is a big bear, on one side a roaring lion, on the other side a charging elephant, and in front of you a dragon. How do you get out of this alive?

Get your drunk ass off the Merrygoround!!!!

Why were dragons called rappers during ancient times?

Because they used to spit fire.

Why did the Dragonborn climb the seven thousand steps?

He wanted to know what all the Fus was about !!

Do you know what's at stake for the tired dragon?

Flaming yawn.

Why do dragons sleep all day?

So they can fight knights!

What's the difference between Santa Clause and a knight?

One slays a dragon, the other drags a sleigh!

How do you milk a Dragon?

By making 3 movies and a couple TV series about it.

Why don't you want to listen to a dragon's story?

Because they tend to drag-on

What did the tired dragon make for dinner?

Flamin yawn.

Why did the yellow dragon keep slipping?

Banana for scale.

2 dragons walk into a bar

The first one says "it's hot in here."

The second one says "shut your mouth"

Why did the nobleman eschew the slaying of the dragon?

Because it was a fool's gerund.

How many Dragon Ball Z characters does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one but it takes 15 episodes.

My niece told me this joke: What's the difference between Chanukah and a dragon?

Chanukah is always eight nights.

A dragon sometimes ate knights.

Long ago in a far away land,

A hero comes upon a village. The villagers all look very upset, so the hero asks what happened.

"There is a huge dragon living in the mountain. Every week, it comes down and eats one of our virgin girls" one of the villagers replies.

The hero then promises to help with their predicament and gets to work.

In three weeks' time, the dragon starved to death.

A couple of hikers were tramping through the countryside and had lost their way…..

so by the time they arrived at the "George and Dragon", the village pub where they'd arranged to stay the night, the doors were locked and the owners had gone to bed. They knocked timidly on the front door.
A head appeared …at an upstairs window and shouted, "Go away. Don't you know what time it is? We're closed," and the the window slammed shut.
Undeterred, the hikers knocked again.
"What is it now?" demanded the head.
"Could we speak to George this time please?" asked on the the hikers.

Why do lizards like long stories?

Because they dragon.

What's a dragons favorite food to eat with his soup?

Fire-crackers!

Why are dragon plushies soft and cuddly?

They aren't scale models.

Did you hear about the very old dragon?

They said he started draggin balls.

What's Donkey's favourite movie?

Enter the Dragon

So I went on Dragons Den with my grandad's shotgun and Peter Jones said, "so what's the business idea?"

I said, "It's a very simple concept, Peter. Put the money in the bag."

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the dragon dragon ball puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working dragon dragon ball z piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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