Downing Jokes
32 downing jokes and hilarious downing puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about downing that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Laugh it up at Downing Street! Get ready to hear some funny jokes with a Downing Street twist. From the Prime Minister to the Downing Street Cat, find out what makes the party at 10 Downing Street so special. Have a Guinness with the bartender, a Whiskey with the PM, and enjoy some jokes that only Downing Street could provide.
Funniest Downing Short Jokes
Short downing jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The downing humour may include short downed jokes also.
- My wife stormed into the pub last night as me and the boys were downing shots of Tequila. You're coming home now! she screamed.
No, I'm not, I laughed.
She said, I'm talking to the kids. - My brother just broke the record by downing 22 Russian jets in Ukraine He'll forever be remembered as the worst mechanic in the Russian Air Force
- My Grandfather downed 35 German aircraft during WW2 He still holds the record as the worst mechanic the Luftwaffe ever had.
- My grandfather was responsible for 35 downed German planes in WWII. Still to this day he holds the record as the worst mechanic the Luftwaffe ever had.
- "Hand me downs" Apparently not the right way to ask the wife to hand me our disabled baby.
- My grandfather downed 50 German fighter planes in WWII. Yep. Worst engineer in the Luftwaffe.
- My first dad joke as a new father Fiance: "What's the difference between a carousel and a merry go round?"
Me: "I don't know but they have their ups and downs"
...it begins - Life is like a basketball... It has its ups and downs and is controlled by people that are taller and make more money than you.
- I'm starting to suspect I was cloned from my older brother All my genes are hand-me-downs
*Adapted from a song by His Royal Weirdness - A football team should setup a charity that gives presents to children with Down Syndrome ...and call it Touch Downs.
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Downing One Liners
Which downing one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with downing? I can suggest the ones about lowering and network down.
- What do you call a high person with Downs Syndrome? A baked potato.
- Why is it best to ship boxes using a UPS truck? The DOWNS truck is a little slow.
- I just got a new job as an elevator engineer It has its ups and downs
- What do you call a heritable mental disability? Hand-me-downs
- I was going to buy a drawbridge But apparently they're let downs.
- I bought a new ladder this week... ...it has its ups and downs.
- I use to have a job working in an elevator... it had its ups and downs
- Chuck Norris doesn't do push ups ... He does Earth downs.
- I tried riding a camel instead of a horse once. It had its ups and downs.
- The Russians official stance on the downed MH17 flight: Donetsk, don't tell.
- I tried bungee jumping the other day. It had its ups and downs.
- What did amy winehouse have in common with the Ghostbusters? They both downed spirits.
- I had to clean the elevators at work today The place has its ups and downs
- Nodding It has its ups and downs.
- My day consisted of ups and downs. So I got off the elevator.
10 Downing Jokes
Here is a list of funny 10 downing jokes and even better 10 downing puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why do all the doors in 10 Downing Street have handles? That place already has enough knobs.
- Carpenter needed for 10 Downing Street The Cabinets falling apart
- Carpenter wanted. Cabinet is falling apart Address: 10 Downing Street
Entertaining Downing Jokes to Laugh Out Loud Fun with Everyone
What funny jokes about downing you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean falling jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make downing pranks.
Friend who lives in Russia told me this joke
(English isn't my first language, sorry if the translation isn't the best)
The phone rings at 10 Downing Street.
- Hello, mister Putin would like to speak with Theresa May.
- I'm afraid she's currently sleeping.
- Very well, if she wakes up please tell her that mister Putin would like to talk to her.
- Will do.
- Thank you. *hangs up*
- Wait. What do you mean "if"?
A man walks into a bar sporting the worst haircut you've ever seen...
"Give me two shots of Jack Daniels," he says to the bartender. "One for me, and one for you."
"You know I don't drink on the job," the bartender says, pouring the man a shot.
Downing the drink, the man replies, "And that's why I like you better than my barber."
10 shots of whiskey please!
A man walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of whiskey. The bartender pours them and the guy starts downing them. By the 5th one the bartender asks, "Why are you drinking so fast?"
The guy says, "You'd drink this fast if you had what I have."
The bartender says, "What do you have?"
The guy says, "No money."
A husband and wife are sitting in a bar.
They see a man downing beer across the room.
The wife says: "He proposed to me ten years ago, and I said no."
The husband responds: "And he's still celebrating!"
A man walks into a bar...
A man walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of whiskey. The bartender pours them and the guy starts downing them. By the 5th one the bartender asks, "Why are you drinking so fast?"
The man says, "You'd drink this fast too if you had what I have."
The bartender, now curious, asks, "What do you have?"
The man pauses, then replies, "75 cents."
A Horse walks into a bar
A horse walks into a bar and says to the barman "5 whiskeys please!" before downing the whole lot.
The barman looks at the horse and says "That's quite a stomach you've got, are you an alcoholic?"
The horse says "I don't think I am". Suddenly the horse poofs out of existence.
See the joke is a reference to Descartes the philosopher who coined the phrase "I think. Therefore I am." However explaining this prior to the joke would be putting Descartes before the horse.
The difference perspective has on optimism and pessimism
After downing half of his glass of milk, my ten year old son declared, "*I am an optimist: 'The glass is half empty!'*..."
"*Looking at the glass as half empty is a sign of pessimism son,*" I said.
He smiled and corrected me: "*Not if you don't like what's in it!*"
Having a t**... with a mom and daughter
So it was Saturday night and I had no date and decided to drop in at the bar to get drunk and hopefully a girl to get laid with. As I started downing a few shots I noticed this hot looking mature lady ( must be in her 50s) sitting all alone at a corner table getting drunk and this thought came to mind that if she looks so hot for her age then she must be having a hot looking daughter as well and wish I could have a t**... with them. So I went to her table and asked her if I could join and to my delight she said yes. I chatted her up and next thing I know we caught a taxi and proceeded to her home. In the taxi I told her about my fantasy of having a t**... with a mother daughter combo and to my delight she felt it was a great idea and so we reached her home and as we entered she let out a shout,"Mom you still awake?"
An Aussie and a Kiwi are sitting at a pub, downing a few beers, after a game of rugby.
The kiwi turns to the Aussie and says, "Bro, if I shagged your wife over a railing and got her pregnant, would it make us related?"
To which the Aussie replies, "Dunno, mate, but I do know it'll make us even."
Two elves are winding down in the North Pole bar after a long day of making toys.
After downing some shots of peppermint schnapps, the first elf says to the second, That COVID outbreak in China has really messed up the toy production schedule. I don't think Santa has ever pushed us so hard! .
The second one added, Yeah, things were so bad today that Rudolph and Blitzen were even called in to work on the assembly line.
The first one got an odd look on his face and said, Well, that explains why those Raisinets I found on the floor tasted so strange.
A guy rushes into a bar out of breath and manages to excitedly utter to the bartender "Gimme 6 shots of whiskey quick"!
The bartender says "What's the hurry?" as he lays out the six shots. The guy starts downing the shots as fast as the bartender is filling them. As he is gulping down the last shot, he utters "Well you would drink fast too if you had what I have". The bartender says "well geez mister what do you have"? and the guy says "2 dollars".
