Dorm Jokes

24 dorm jokes and hilarious dorm puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about dorm that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Dorm Short Jokes

Short dorm jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The dorm humour may include short college campus jokes also.

  1. My mother always said, "Pick your clothes up off the floor, I'm not your maid." When I went to college the dorm had a maid who told us, "Pick your clothes up off the floor, I'm not your mother."
  2. When a girl sleeps with girls in college, she's "experimenting" When I do it, I'm "fired" and "a terrible dorm janitor"
  3. I think my college dorm is haunted. Sometimes the ceiling shakes and I hear feint moaning.
  4. Have you seen the entitled philosopher preaching outside the women's dorm today? What a Kant.
  5. What is this strange root? Found in my dorm's common room fridge. Friend got drunk and took a bite, says it tasted like raw jicama but more bland
  6. Why weren't the communists allowed to live in the dorms? Because there are no parties after 11:00.
  7. My friend moved to Germany for school and was arrested and charged for voyeurism in the female dorms... ...he insists he's innocent, as he was only there to study abroad.
  8. I'm a poor student... living in dorm, so to save money, I cook eggs everyday in various ways because they're a cheap source of nutrient.
    You could say I'm the resident eggspert.
  9. While recently wandering through the city, I passed the dorm I lost my virginity in ten years ago. It's safe to say that I've come a long way.
  10. I've had rain boots sitting in my dorm since college started. I never thought I'd need them. As it turns out, these boots are made for Joaquin.

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Dorm One Liners

Which dorm one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with dorm? I can suggest the ones about campus and bedroom.

  1. I saw Uranus from my dorm room last night... ...Next time close your Urcurtains.
  2. Which of Holden Caulfield's dorm neighbors became a rapper? Ackley Kid Rock
  3. Monday, after class, I get back to my dorm ready to start all my homework due this week.
  4. Its so hot in my dorm room that... Two hobbits threw a ring in here.
  5. the vacuum cleaner in my dorm is so bad.. i would say it s**... but it can't even do that

Dorm joke, the vacuum cleaner in my dorm is so bad..

Rib-Tickling Dorm Jokes that Bring Friends Together

What funny jokes about dorm you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean boarding house jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make dorm pranks.

Since I'm going away to college, my Dad sat me down to have a talk.

He said OK, Dan, you're going off to college. You're going to be living away from home, in a dorm, surrounded by beautiful girls. So I got you something from the drug store.
I said It's ok, Dad- I already know about condoms.
He's said No - anti-depressants.

This is my dad's (a math major) favourite joke. What's the difference between an Engineer and a Mathematician?

A mathematician and an engineer are living together in a dorm when a fire starts in their room.

The mathematician wakes up and sees the fire. He quickly scans the room and sees a fire extinguisher and goes back to bed, happy knowing a solution exists.
The engineer wakes up, sees the fire and uses the extinguisher to put it out.

A computer science student at MIT showed up at his buddies dorm room with a new bike.

His buddy said sweet bike, where'd ya get it?
You'll never believe this, he said, I was walking across campus and this beautiful blonde on a bike stopped, threw down her bike, tore off all her clothes and said _take whatever you want!_
His buddy stared at him blankly for a minute, then said smart. Her clothes would have never fit you.

Engineering student show up to his lab partner's house with a new bike...

His partner says, "wow.. that's a pretty nice bike you got there."
Engineering student says, "yeah, I was outside my dorm last night when a co-ed rode up on it. She was really drunk. She threw the bike on the ground and took off all of her clothes and said 'you can have whatever you want.'"
Partner says, "it's a good thing you chose the bike... I don't think the clothes would have fit you."

Where y'all from?

Two freshmen girls are moving into their dorm room together.
One of them's from Georgia, one of them's from Connecticut.
The girl from Connecticut's helping her mother put up curtains.
Girl from Georgia turns to them and says, "Hi. Where y'all from?"
Girl from Connecticut says, "We're from a place where we know not to end a sentence with a preposition."
The girl from Georgia says, "Oh, beg my pardon. Where y'all from...c**...?"

Why can't dormant volcanoes erupt?

They have eruptile dysfunction

Two girls are setting up their new dorm room together.

One is from Georgia and the other is from Connecticut. The one from Connecticut has her mom there helping her put up some blinds. The one from Georgia asks, "Hey! Where y'all from?" The other girl replies, "We're from a place where we know not to end our sentences with prepositions." So the girl from Georgia says,
"Oh, I'm sorry. Where y'all from...c**...?"

Todd's Room

The college dorm advisor heard strange noises from Todd's room, well after lights-out. He knocked on the door and said, "Todd, are you entertaining in there?" From behind the door, Todd answered, "Just a second I'll ask her!"


My sister has always been fascinated with cell biology and she moved across state to attend a better college, moving her into her dorm we moved a dresser to benefit the small space she had and in doing so she dropped it on my foot. I yelled out MITOSIS!
(This is my first original joke be gentle)

Would you agree that it's bad for Facebook to steal users' blood and use it to create a clone army?

That's an interesting question that I'll have to discuss further with our team. Did you know I started this company in my dorm room?

Dorm joke, While recently wandering through the city, I passed the dorm I lost my virginity in ten years ago.