The Best 28 Doorway Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Doorway jokes. There are some doorway portal jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these doorway gateway puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Doorway Jokes and Puns

Police dog

One evening, a deputy in the canine division was dispatched to the scene of a possible burglary, where he discovered the back door of a building open. He let the dog out of his patrol car and commanded it to enter and seek. Jumping from the back seat, the dog headed for the building. After lunging through the doorway, the dog froze and backed out. My friend was puzzled until he investigated further. Then he noticed the sign on the building: "Veterinarian's Office."

A middle aged lady decides to revamp her sex life with her husband.

She asks her friends what she should do and the concensus is to get some sexy lingerie and surprise him. So she goes out and buys a lacy bra and crotchless panties. That night when her husband is in bed watching TV she appears in the doorway wearing the lingerie and says 'hey big boy! Fancy some of this?', he looks over casually, his eyes widen, he sits bolt upright in the bed and shouts 'fuck no! Look what it did to your panties!'.

Curing a nuns hiccups

A nurse is going to work, walking through the hospitals parking lot, when a nun runs past her, screaming and crying. The nurse approaches the doctor standing in the doorway and asks, "What's wrong with that nun?" "Oh," the doctors says, "I told her she was pregnant." "Oh, so she's pregnant?" "No, but it share cured her hiccups."

Doorway joke, Curing a nuns hiccups

Three wise men arrived to visit the child lying in the manger...

One of the wise men was exceptionally tall and bumped his head on the low doorway as he entered the stable. "Jesus Christ" he exclaimed.
Joseph said: "Write that down, Mary. It's better than Wayne."

A woman answers her door...

And a man is standing in the doorway. He says, "lady I'm sorry, but I think I just hit your cat." The lady replies, " oh no, I don't think so, he hardly ever gets out of the house." The man says, "well it came running out of your yard." The woman then asks, "what does it look like?" The man says, "well it looks kinda flat and runny." "No what did it look like before you hit it?". "Surprised. "


Robin Williams' Favorite Joke

Guy's having sex with his wife. All of a sudden he looks over, and there in the doorway is his son, about eight years old. Kid looks horrified, and the kid runs away. The guy says to his wife, ''Well, I'd better talk to Timmy.''

He puts on his clothes and goes to Timmy's room. He opens the door , and there's Timmy nailing Grandma. The father goes ''Oh, my God!'' And the kid goes, ''Not so funny when it's your mom, is it?"

So I'm at the dentist's office...

...in the waiting room when this woman comes storming out, shouting curses and threatening to sue. When she's gone, the dentist is standing in the doorway, speechless, so I ask him, "gee, doc, what's got her knickers in a twist?" And he says, "I don't know, I just asked her to take a shot in the mouth."

Doorway joke, So I'm at the dentist's office...

A man discovered that feeding seagulls to his porpoises will make them live forever.

A man discovered that feeding seagulls to his porpoises will make them live forever. He went to the beach and grabbed two seagulls. As he arrived back home, he saw, sound asleep in his doorway, an old stodgy lion. As he stepped over the lion carrying the seagulls, police surrounded and arrested him. Of course the charge was transporting gulls across a staid lion for immortal porpoises.

A German, An Austrian and a Czech are walking down the street.

A German, An Austrian and a Czech are walking down the street, suddenly the German stops.

"Vait up you guys. I need to slip into ze bank for und moment." says the German. The trio walk towards the bank and the German and the Austrian walk inside. They turn around. The Czech is stood in the doorway.

"Vhat are you vaiting for?" asks the Austrian.

"It says no checks." replies the Czech.

A man and his wife are having sex...

...They are going at it hot and heavy, and suddenly they hear a noise. It's their son, little Timmy, standing in the doorway. Shocked, Timmy runs back to his room.

The father goes, "I'll go talk to Timmy."

So he goes to Timmy's room and opens the door; there, he sees Timmy's giving it hot and heavy to grandma!

The father, disturbed, says, "O my god!"

Timmy goes, "Not so funny when it's your mother, is it?"

A widow puts out an ad for a man...

She put out an ad for a man that would not beat her, not run away, and could satisfy her sexually. A few days later the doorbell rings. And in the doorway is a man with no arms or legs. He told her he was there to answer her ad, and she asked him why he thought he fit the criteria.

"Well, I have no arms so I will never beat you. I have no legs so I can't run from you."

"How do you suppose that you can satisfy me sexual," she asked with a puzzled face.

"Well, I rang the doorbell didn't I?"

You can explore doorway glimpse reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean doorway room dad jokes. There are also doorway puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


A dad and his daughter are having an argument...

The daughter gets really frustrated with the situation, and goes to leave the room. When she reaches the doorway, she turns around and blurts out "AND BY THE WAY, JIM MORRISON WAS OVERRATED!".

Her dad yells back "HEY, WHAT'D I TELL YOU ABOUT SLAMMING THE DOORS".

What do you call a Greek philosopher who won't move from the doorway?

Obstacles.

A man is having loud, passionate sex with his wife...

when all of a sudden he looks over and sees his son Johnny looking at them through the doorway. Horrified, Johnny runs away and his dad puts on some pants and starts running after him.

He gets to Johnny's room and sees him nailing his Grandma. The father goes 'oh goodness me!' and Johnny replies saying, 'not so funny when it's your mum, is it?'

Why don't Jehovah Witness' get killed during an earthquake...

Because they are always in your doorway.

I wanted to see if I could become invisible to others

So I stood in the doorway of a supermarket holding a charity tin.

Doorway joke, I wanted to see if I could become invisible to others

I took my fat girlfriend down to the local Italian, but she got stuck in the doorway..

I couldn't get pasta

Joseph Stalin is walking through a small town when he came upon a little girl

Joseph Stalin was walking through a small town when he came upon a little girl sitting in the doorway of a house. He smiled at her and said "Little girl, do you know who I am?"
The little girl gives him a blank stare.
"You really don't know? I'm the one who gave you everything you have!"
The little girl's face lights up, and she runs into the house shouting "Mum! Mum! Uncle Ivan is home from America!"

Abraham wandered into Sam's pawnshop and placed a leather coat on the counter.

How much will you give me for this jacket?

Sam checked it over. $20, and that's the best he replied.

But that jacket is worth $100" argued Abraham.

Sam was adamant. $20 or nothing.

Are you sure that's all it's worth? pressed Abe.

Positive

Okay, said Abe. "Here's your $20.  The jacket was hanging in your doorway and I was wondering how much it was worth.


Yo mama so short...

she limbos under the doorway!

A man is half listening to his wife.

She mentions putting a potted plant in the doorway. He goes to bed a few minutes later. He wakes up and feels like he's forgetting something. He steps out of his room, still confused.

And then it hit him.

I got kicked out of the bar today.

So I turned around and said: next time I get stuck in the doorway, use butter first.

A blind guy walks into a bar. .

And a stool, and a table, then hits his head on the doorway on the way out.

At 3'o'clock in the morning, a wife hears her husband stumble in through the door,

She goes down stairs and sees him standing in the doorway drunk.

she says Have you been drinking?

the husband laughed and said No honey, I drove home.

The wife's face drops and she begins to panic.

The husband then starts to freak out and says What's wrong?!

The wife looks at him and angrily says
You can't drive and neither of us own a car.

My neighbour was sunbathing naked in her garden and as I was wanking while watching her from the window I caught my wife staring at me in the doorway...

Do you think she might be a pervert?

The court jester decided to play a prank

So he got a bucket of coal dust from the blacksmith and rigged it over a doorway.

Soon enough Sir Lancelot walks up in his shiniest silver armor. He'd spent the entire morning polishing it to a mirror finish. As soon as he walks through the doorway, a trip wire dumps the bucket of coal dust over him turning his polished armor a dingy black. Needless to say he was storming mad, covered in filthy black dust.

It was a dark and stormy knight.

Drink

A drunk is refused a drink in a bar, so he undertakes to prove to the barman that he is sober.
He gestures toward a cat near the doorway and says, "You see that cat coming in the door? It has two eyes. If I were drunk, I'd see four!"

The bartender looks, then pauses a moment. Finally he responds, "You're drunker than I thought!", taking the rest of the alcohol away, "That cat isn't coming in, it's going out!"

Why is president Zelensky still in Kiev?

His humongous balls keep getting stuck in the doorway.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the doorway gate jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working doorway minutes piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes