Door To Door Sales Jokes
13 door to door sales jokes and hilarious door to door sales puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about door to door sales that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Door To Door Sales Short Jokes
Short door to door sales jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The door to door sales humour may include short knock doors jokes also.
- If they didn't want me to kick in the door and start taking stuff then why'd they call it a doorbuster sale?
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Door To Door Sales One Liners
Which door to door sales one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with door to door sales? I can suggest the ones about sales people and salesman.
- I can't wait for the Black Friday door buster sales I need a new battering ram.
Ridiculous Door To Door Sales Jokes to Spark Fun and Laughter
What funny jokes about door to door sales you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean knocking door jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make door to door sales pranks.
Boat for sale
Ole walks by Sven's house and sees a sign that says "Boat for sale". He walks up the driveway and only sees a tractor and a lawn mower. He goes up to the door and says, "Ole, I see dat sign dat says 'boat for sale,' but alls I see is a tractor and a lawn mower." Sven says, "Yup, and dey're boat for sale."
John sees a "boat for sale" sign and decides to go take a look...
Behind the sign the there is only an old tractor and a beat up truck, so he goes to the door and an old newfie answers.
John says "I'm interested in the boat you have for sale"
The newfie looks confused and says "no bye, I ain't got no boat for sale."
"But" John says, "you have a sign out by that old truck and tractor..."
"Aye," replies the newfie, "and dere boat for sale!"
A man walks past a house that has a sign posted up saying "Boat for sale" and decides to check it out
As he's walking up the driveway, all he sees is an old car and a grill.
Confused, he knocks on the door and asks the Jamaican home owner, "hey, I can see that you have a sign out front saying you've got a boat, but all I can see is an old car and a grill.."
"Ya mon!" the Jamaican home owner excitedly replies, "and dem boat for sale!"
A man has an interview for a Sales Manager position at a company.
During the interview, the Hiring Manager pulls out a brand new laptop and sets it on the desk in front of him.
If you're as good as you say you are – sell me this laptop.
The man picks the device up, studied it for a few seconds, then puts it under his arm and walks out the door.
He's halfway down the hall when the Hiring Manager shouts, Hey! Bring me back that laptop!
To which the man turns and replies, £200 and it's yours.
A man was walking one day
When he came to this big house in a nice neighborhood.
Suddenly he realized there was a couple making love out on the lawn. Then he noticed another couple over behind a tree. Then another couple behind some bushes by the house.
He walked up to the door of the house, and knocked. A well dressed woman answered the door, and the man asked what kind of a place this was.
"This is a brothel", replied the madam.
"Well, what's all this out on the lawn?" queried the man.
"Oh, we're having a yard sale today."
Lawnmower for sale
A little boy hears the doorbell and answers the door. The gentleman at the door says, "Hi, I'm here about the lawnmower that's for sale."
The little boy replies, "My parents aren't home right now, but it's in the garage if you want to look at it."
The man starts pulling the rope to make sure it will crank. After several tries, he says, "Son, this lawnmower won't start."
The boy says, "That's because you haven't cussed at it yet."
Startled, the man replies, "I'm a man of the cloth. I haven't said any swear words in years."
The boy says, "Keep pulling that rope - it'll come back to you."
Salesman
A sales company has particular trouble selling bibles. One day, a man comes in with a job application and says, "l-l-l-l'd l-l-l-l-l-like t-t-t-t-t-to b-b-b-b- b-be a b-b-b-bible salesman, s-s-s-sir." lnititally, he doesn't want to give the job to this man, but decided to try him out.
After three weeks, the manager is looking at the charts and realizes that the newest guy is selling the most copies. Amazed, he calls him in to his office. "You've only worked here for three weeks and you've already sold more copies than anyone else here! How do you do it?"
"W-w-w-w-w-well, l g-g-g-go up t-t-t-t-to th-the d-d-d-door and-d-d l-l--l s-s-s-say, w-w-w-w-would y-y-y-y-y-y-you l-l-l-l-l-like t-t-to b-b-b-b-buy a b-b-b-bible, or w-w-w-would y-y-you l-l-l-like m-m-me t-t-t-to r-r-r-r-read it t-t-t-t-t-to y-y-y-you?"
6**... is the Number of the Beast
This from Todd Lewis, who has a great sense of humor.
We all know that .
But did you know that:
* $6**....95 - Retail price of the Beast
* $699.25 - Price of the Beast plus 5% sales tax
* $769.95 - Price of the Beast with all accessories and replacement soul
* $656.66 - Walmart price of the Beast
* 6, uh... what was that number again? - Number of the Blonde Beast
* 00666 - Zip code of the Beast
* 1-900-6**...-0666 - Live Beasts! One-on-one pacts! Call Now! Only $6.66/minute. Over 18 only please.
* Route 6**... - Highway of the Beast
* 6**... F - Oven temperature for roast Beast
* 666k - Retirement plan of the Beast
* 6.66 % - 5 year CD interest rate at First Beast National Bank, $6**... minimum deposit.
* i66686 - CPU of the Beast
* 666i - BMW of the Beast
* DSM-6**... - Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of the Beast
* 668 - Next-door neighbor of the Beast
* 2x4x666 - Lumber of the Beast
A new CEO starts his first day
A fellow had just been hired as the new CEO of a large high tech corporation. The CEO who was stepping down met with him privately and presented him with three numbered envelopes. "Open these if you run up against a problem you don't think you can solve," he said.
Well, things went along pretty smoothly, but six months later, sales took a downturn and he was really catching a lot of heat. About at his wit's end, he remembered the envelopes. He went to his drawer and took out the first envelope. The message read, "Blame your predecessor."
The new CEO called a press conference and tactfully laid the blame at the feet of the previous CEO. Satisfied with his comments, the press -- and Wall Street - responded positively, sales began to pick up and the problem was soon behind him.
About a year later, the company was again experiencing a slight dip in sales, combined with serious product problems. Having learned from his previous experience, the CEO quickly opened the second envelope. The message read, "Reorganize." This he did, and the company quickly rebounded.
After several consecutive profitable quarters, the company once again fell on difficult times. The CEO went to his office, closed the door and opened the third envelope.
The message said, "Prepare three envelopes."
So a woman walks into a pet store...
and sees a parrot on sale for 50 bucks. Now, a parrot is a pretty expensive bird, so she asks the man behind the counter why the bird was on sale, and he tells her; "Well the bird used to live in a brothel, so sometimes it says some pretty v**... things." The woman thinks for a minute, and says, "I guess that's fine. I'll take him". So she brings the bird home and sets its cage up near the front door. When he knows what's going on he says, "new house, new madame!" The woman thinks to herself, "it came from a brothel, so I guess it's just learning". The woman's daughters get home from school and the bird says, "new house, new girls, new madame!". "It will just take time" she thinks. Then the woman's husband gets home and the bird says, "hi Jeff!"