Door Buttons Jokes
18 door buttons jokes and hilarious door buttons puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about door buttons that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Door Buttons Short Jokes
Short door buttons jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The door buttons humour may include short elevator buttons jokes also.
- A younger chimp asks one of his elders what's a conditioned reflex. The older chimp says: "When I press this red button an idiot in a white coat will open that door and bring us some bananas."
- Don't feel bad about pressing the close door button when you see someone running for the elevator. If they have that much energy, they should take the stairs.
- Not saying we were poor, but many a time, my mother would send me next door with a button... ...and ask our neighbor if she would sew a shirt on it.
- Why did it always take so long for President Obama to get into the presidential limo? The driver got scared and kept pressing the door lock button when he saw him approach.
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Door Buttons One Liners
Which door buttons one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with door buttons? I can suggest the ones about door handle and doorknob.
- Handicap b**... They really open a lot of doors for you
Ridiculous Door Buttons Jokes to Spark Fun and Laughter
What funny jokes about door buttons you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean doorbell jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make door buttons pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife.
"You come to the front door of the apartment. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in and with your elbow, push 3. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell."
"Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these b**... with my elbow?...
"What, you're coming empty handed?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Jewish Elbow
A Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife.
"You come to the front door of the apartment. I am in apartment 301.
There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301.
I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell."
"Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these b**... with my elbow?
"What...you coming empty handed?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Boy VS Girl Friends
A Girl is giving directions to her new boyfriend to get to her apartment.
She says: You come to the front door of the apartment complex where I live and look for apartment 14A, and with your elbow push button 14A. Come inside and you'll find the elevator on the right. With your elbow hit 14. When you get out of the elevator you'll find my apartment on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell and I'll open the door for you
The boyfriend says: Dear, that sounds very easy to find, but why am I hitting all these b**... with my elbow ?
Oh my God!! You're not coming empty-handed, are you?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
visiting grandma...
A grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife.
"You come to the front door of the apartments. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside and the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3rd Floor. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell. OK?"
"Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these b**... with my elbow? .........
"What . .. . .. .. You're coming empty handed?"
Amish man and his son go to a big shopping mall for the first time
They're staring in wonder at all of the shiny big buildings and the massive panes of glass when the two come across two big shiny metal doors.
"What is it, dad?" asked the son.
"I have no idea." replied the father. I have never seen anything like this in all my life.
They watched in wonder as an old lady walked up to the doors, pressed a button, and stepped inside the now-open doors. The doors closed once again and a while later, a 20-year-old blonde strolled out of the doors.
The father told his son, "Go get your mother!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I held an elevator door for an elderly patient...
I don't know if this belongs in jokes but I had to post it somewhere.
I am in the main hospital. I am going up to the 3rd floor and I call the elevator. I see an elderly patient coming and hold the door for him.
Patient: "Thank you"
Me: "Absolutely, where are we going?" wondering what button he needs pushed.
Patient: "I'd like to just go to heaven."
Me: *internal w**... moment, how tf do I respond to that. I look at the button panel.*
Me: "Well.....closest I can get you is 5th floor."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A visit to my grandmother
A grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson, who is coming to visit with his wife:
"You come to the front door of the apartment complex. I am in apartment 14T.
There is a big panel at the door. With your elbow push button 14T.
I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right.
Get in, and with your elbow hit 14.
When you get out I am on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell".
"Grandma, that sounds easy, but why am I hitting all these b**... with my elbow"?
"You're coming empty handed"?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson, who is coming to visit with his wife:
You come to the front door of the apartment complex. I am in apartment 14T.
There is a big panel at the door. With your elbow push button 14T. I will buzz you in.
Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow hit 14. When you get out I am on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell".
"Grandma, that sounds easy, but why am I hitting all these b**... with my elbow"?
You're coming empty handed"?
This morning as I was buttoning my shirt, a button fell off.
After that, I picked up my briefcase, and the handle fell off.
Then I went to open the door, and the doorknob fell off.
I went to get into my car, and the door handle came off in my hand.
Now I'm afraid to pee.
A man gets in the hotel elevator
He hears a voice say "going up" and looks around, weirded out that he can't see anyone nearby who would have said that. But when he chooses his floor, the voice says "door closing" and he realizes it was the elevator talking.
So, after his vacation has ended, he gets into the elevator with his suitcase. When he pressed the ground floor button, the elevator says "goodbye son". The man says "how can I be your son? You're just a machine." And the elevator says "I brought you up, didn't I?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
r**... and the elevator.
r**... Magic Elevator
A r**... family are visiting a big city for the first time.
The father ans son are in the hotel lobby when the spot an elevator.
"What's that Paw?" The boy asked.
"I ain't never did see nothin' like that in my life" Replied the father.
Seconds later an old frail woman walks in the hotel door and hobbles to the elevator. She presses the button with her cain, waits for the doors to open and gets in.
The father and son, still amazed by this contraption, continue to watch.
They hear a ping noise and the doors open again. Out steps a beautiful 20 year old b**... blonde.
The father looks at his son and says "Go get your Maw !"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I was having problems with my computer
I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Joshua, the 11 year old next door, who plays League of Legends every day, all night long.
Joshua clicked a couple of b**... and solved the problem.
As he was walking away, I called after him, "So, what was wrong?"
He replied, "It was an ID ten T error."
I didn't want to appear s**..., but nonetheless inquired, "An ID Ten T error?
What's that? In case I need to fix it again."
Joshua grinned, "Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?"
"No", I replied.
"Write it down," he said, "and I think you'll figure it out."
So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T
I used to like that little boy.