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Doomed Jokes

32 doomed jokes and hilarious doomed puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about doomed that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Doomed Short Jokes

Short doomed jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The doomed humour may include short condemned jokes also.

  1. Got stuck behind a tractor on the way to work this morning. The bloke on top wouldn't stop screaming "We're all doomed! The end of the world is nigh! Repent!" Turned out it was Farmer Geddon
  2. That priest from Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom was actually a really inspirational guy. He touched so many hearts.
  3. Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. Those who fail to clear their history are doomed to explain it.
  4. Whoever invented police helicopters doomed us all Everything's gonna happen now that pigs can fly
  5. If the average world temperature rises 2 degrees Celsius, mankind is doomed. That is why America measures temperature in Fahrenheit.
  6. I said to my wife the next generation is doomed for sure. She asked why I was so sure about it.
    I replied because we are the ones who would be giving them advice when we are old.
  7. I knew my camping holiday was doomed when I saw the people at the next pitch struggling with a torn ground sheet and bent pegs. It was a portent.
  8. A dyslexic person peeing his pants would spell certain doom. His urination spells his ruination.
  9. Despite what people think, it's not all doom and gloom being a morgue attendant. This morning I had a right little Chuckle.
  10. What do you call Harrison Ford shivering in the corner of the Temple of Doom? Indiana Jonesing

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Doomed One Liners

Which doomed one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with doomed? I can suggest the ones about ruined and devastated.

  1. I was told I should rearrange my mood. But that could spell my doom.
  2. Those who forget... Those that forget the pasta are doomed to reheat it.
  3. how do we know communism was doomed from the beginning? All the red flags
  4. We should've known communism was doomed to fall. There were a lot of red flags.
  5. Why couldn't Frodo drop the Ring into Mt. Doom? Force of Hobbit.
  6. Wizard: A fox prophesied doom! King: Foxes lie. Why'd you listen to a Fox for news?
  7. If Eve doomed the entire human race for an apple... What would she do for a Klondike Bar?
  8. How did Gandlaf know that Frodo would take the ring to Mount Doom? coz Elijah Would
  9. To the Chicago Cubs Thanks, you've doomed us all.
  10. What's a hobbits favorite drink? Mountain Doom
  11. Technically DOOM is a Christian game... Because all you do is kill Demons.
  12. the thing about that new DOOM's campaign is... Id couldn't be any better!
  13. What's the Doom marine's favorite musical instrument?... Violins
  14. Those who ignore history, are doomed by Chuck Norris.
  15. How do you spell doom? Avra kedavara let there be doom!

Doomed joke, How do you spell doom?

Comical Doomed Jokes and Gems that Will Get You in Laughter Land

What funny jokes about doomed you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean marooned jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make doomed pranks.

Your Girlfriend Is Pregnant !

Guy: But doctor that can't be right. We use condoms everytime we have s**....
Doctor: Well, the test result would suggest otherwise. Maybe the c**... broke?
Guy: No I'm sure it didn't.
Doctor: Alright then. Let me tell you a story. A guy was wandering in the forest where he encountered a tiger. The tiger looked really ferocious and the guy knew that he was doomed. Cornered, the guy then points his umbrella's tip at the tiger and shouts Bang at the tiger. The tiger died.
Guy: That can't be right. Someone else must have shot the tiger.
Doctor: Exactly.

I made this joke up on the way home from work, sorry if it s**...: A history teacher tells a failing student that those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

Student: But history is so boring!
Teacher: Well, if you don't do better you'll be retaking it next year.
Student: What??
Teacher: I TOLD you, those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it!

Why was h**... doomed to fail?

because jew wrongs don't make a riech

Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

It it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it it.

Villager 1: Flee for your lives! The mad scientist in the castle turned a tiny lizard into a monster that's destroying everything in its path!

Villager 2: Meh, why bother. We're doomed from the gecko.

A group of priests stand by the road...

... holding a sign "IT'S NOT TOO LATE TO TURN BACK. THIS PATH IS DOOMED!!" Most people just drive by but then suddenly someone stops and yells at the priests: "No one will belive this religious b**...! You're wasting your time!" After that one of the priests says: Maby we should just write "The bridge has fallen!"?

My grandfather was an old nautical engineer who tried to warn everyone on the Titanic that they were doomed

First he yelled at the passengers while they boarded...he was ignored
Then he yelled at the Captain and the First Mate...he was ignored
Then as he continued to yell his warnings; people began to tell him to be quiet and that he was crazy
Eventually, after all his yelling; Security came and escorted him out of the movie theater

Doomed joke, I knew my camping holiday was doomed when I saw the people at the next pitch struggling with a torn