Don Jokes
81 don jokes and hilarious don puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about don that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Fun-Filled Don Jokes to Boost Your Mood
What is a good don joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Do you mind if I sit beside you? The girl replied with a loud voice, "NO, I DON 'T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!" All the students in the library started staring at the guy; he was truly embarrassed.
After a couple of minutes, the girl walked quietly to the guy 's table and said, "I study psychology, and I know what a man is thinking. I guess you felt embarrassed, right?
The guy then responded with a loud voice, $500 FOR ONE NIGHT? THAT 'S WAY TOO MUCH!
All the people in the library looked at the girl in shock.
The guy stood and whispered in her ear, "I study law, and I know how to screw people."
President Trump: "I've raised THE BEST kids....."
".....They are the most polite people you have ever seen. Just today Don Jr. has already said "Pardon Me, Dad" at least 10 times. He has such great manners!"
It shouldn't be surprising our first black president was elected prior to Trump
It's always darkest before Don
Recently, I was watching the Republican debate, and they were debating abortion.
Donald Trump was talking about how opposed to it he was, but I thought to myself, come on Don, you're a businessman. I bet you wouldn't be this upset if you could charge them an early termination fee.
Don Sterling is so old and so racist...
...He remembers when the nba draft took place on a dock.
I'm a regular Don Juan
The ladies Don Juan anything to do with me
I hear that soon Reddit will require all redditors to don a cowboy hat / boots, and dance a j**... in order to log in…
I'm not a big fan of Two-Step Authentication.
Trump & Trudeau
Donald Trump and Justin Trudeau were we discussing politics when Donald leans in close and says:
Donald: You know Justin, if the US were a Dictatorship I would be a Dictator.
Justin: Yea, I suppose so Donald.
Donald: And you know if the US were a Monarchy I would be a Monarch.
Justin: That's also true Don, but I hate to break it to you, the US is a Country.
I went to see Don Quixote at the theater yesterday and there was a short break in the middle of the play.
We didn't know it would happen, no one expected the Spanish intermission.
The White House reversed its proposed cuts to the Special Olympics.
Now Don Jr. can finally get back to training.
How do you dress like a Turkish person?
Don a kebab.
The Don of the local Mafia's phone rang
It was his favorite nephew.
Uncle, the cops are closing in on me. I'm going to be arrested.
Thank you for telling me, said the Don, Be a good Sicilian don't talk until our lawyer gets there.
What if they beat me?
Don't worry, it's easy not to talk. Just sit on your hands.
Any Irishman and a Scott have a duel at a bar...
The irishman exclaims, "You Scottish can't drink! We Irish are the best drinkers!"
Scott exclaims, "Ye don no wha ye takin boot! Any scott can drink any irishman under ye table!"
The two drink to the early morning. Who wins?
The bartender.
Don Draper and Meiosis get together for an advertisement meeting. They agree on one thing.
s**... Cells.
Don and his son
Big time gangster Don Vito Corleone picked up his son Santino after his annual exams. 'How was it?' he asked.
'They questioned me for three hours, papa. But I told them nothing.'
I lost my job as a waiter
Apparently, I had insulted an infamous mafia boss by taking away his plate.
He told me he was Don
When it comes to the ladies, I'm a regular Don Juan ...
... the ladies Don Juan anything to do with me.
A man stumbles across a magic lamp while walking in a forest
Upon rubbing it a genie appears and says that for freeing him he will grant him one wish.
The man thinks for a while and finally says :
" I wish that I peed out don perignon champagne"
The genie albeit confused grants the wish.
The man quickly hurries home and tells it all his wife.
The wife excitedly fetches some champagne glasses.
To which the man says "Oh no honey, tonight you drink from the bottle"
Knock knock (from my 6 year old)
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Far Don.
Far Don who?
f**... on YOU!
A girl goes to a psychic. Don and Joe both like her and she is confused and wants to find out who is the lucky one that can be her life partner.
Psychic: "Don is going to the be the lucky one.
Joe will marry you."
Donald Trump is visiting Queen Elizabeth.
Mr Trump turns to Queen Elizabeth and says "I want to be a King."
Liz says "Ahh but you do not have a kingdom."
Don says "What about a prince?"
Liz says "Ahh but you do not have a principality."
Don says "A duke then?"
Liz says "Ahh but you do not have a duchy."
Don asks "Well what can I be?"
Liz says "Well I think a country suits you well."
Don and his friend Eva we're exploring caves in the town of Level for our palindrome school project
Eva said there were many things they could not do in caves. Don asked her a question using his knowledge from palindrome school. Don said, Eva can I stab bats in a cave . She said no don . Don then said, Eva can I pose as aesop in a cave . She again said, no don .
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Don Juan Jokes
Here is a list of funny don juan jokes and even better don juan puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mom only carries one baby photo in her wallet. Because if you've seen Juan you've seen Amal.
- Mexican and African jokes are all pretty much the same.... Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal...
- Jesus take the wheel Carlos take the stereo, Manuel get the seats and I'll be the Juan on watch.
- My girlfriend told me she was pregnant, so I started looking for some names... ...in the end I chose Juan Carlos and took the first flight to Spain.
- I hate tacos! Said no Juan ever.
- I don't like tacos Said no Juan ever.
- Black jokes and Mexican jokes are all the same... Once you've seen Juan you've seen Jamal.
- Hispanic and black jokes are really all the same... Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal.
- Did you hear about the Mexican that got stabbed on a golf course? I guess someone made a hole in Juan.
- I hate Cinco De Mayo! -Said no Juan ever
Dogs Don T Tell Jokes
Here is a list of funny dogs don t tell jokes and even better dogs don t tell puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I've been interrogating the dog for two solid hours.
He still won't tell me who's a good boy. - Going to mass is basically just like a dog being trained A guy tells you to sit and stand and sit and stand, and at the end they give you a snack
- I named my dog 6 miles so i can tell people that i walk 6 miles every single day.
- A police officer with a drug dog approaches a man and says, "this dog tells me you're on drugs…" To which the man responds, "I'm on drugs?!? You're the only talking to a dog!"
- How do you tell who loves you more. Your wife or your dog? Put both of them in the trunk of your car...drive around...open the trunk and see who is happy to see you.
- It's raining cats and dogs outside. Know how I can tell? I stepped in a poodle.
- A cop knocked on my door A cop knocked on my door to tell me my dogs were chasing people on bikes.
My dogs don't even own bikes… - Policeman: My dog tells me you're on drugs. Me: You're the one with the talking dog!
- My dog tried to tell me i ate the wrong kind of mushroom But by that point, i knew it was far too late
- If I had a dog... ... I would name it 5 miles. Then I could tell people I walk '5 miles' everyday.
Don Wong Jokes
Here is a list of funny don wong jokes and even better don wong puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why can't Chinese people have white babies? Because two Wongs don't make a white
- Why can't Asian couples have Caucasian babies? Because two Wongs don't make a white.
- I threw a Chinese man down the stairs... It was wong on so many levels.
- I threw an Asian man down a flight of stairs. It was Wong on so many levels
- A Chinese couple gave birth to an albino baby ...which just goes to show that two Wongs do make a white.
- What do you call an Asian in an elevator Wong on so many levels
- Why can't two Chinese parents make a white child Two Wongs don't make a white
- A chinese couple had a baby The baby turned out to be white. The father looked sternly at the mother and said: "Two Wongs don't make a white."
- I win every argument I have with my chinese friend... He's Wong, and I'm white.
- What do you call a Chinese man with a bad sense of direction? Wong Wei
Don Draper Jokes
Here is a list of funny don draper jokes and even better don draper puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Where did Don Draper go after an excruciating hangover Adville
- I saw Don Draper driving a toupee across a high-wire. Another character driven piece on cable.
- Don Draper and Meiosis get together for an advertisement meeting. They agree on one thing. s**... Cells.
