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Dogs On Couch Jokes

16 dogs on couch jokes and hilarious dogs on couch puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about dogs on couch that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Dogs On Couch Short Jokes

Short dogs on couch jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The dogs on couch humour may include short dog sitting jokes also.

  1. I said to my psychiatrist I keep thinking I'm a dog He said, "get on the couch please."
    I said, "I'm not allowed on the couch."
  2. I want to get a dog and name it Syndrome. So that every time he gets on my couch, I can yell "DOWN SYNDROME"
  3. A Man Goes to a Psychiatrist Squatting with His Hands on the Floor "I think I'm a dog."
    "Have a seat on the couch."
    "I'm not allowed on the furniture."
  4. A guy tells his therapist that he felt like a dog lately. She said "Come on now, off the couch."
  5. I was going to take my dog to a pet psychiatrist But he knows he's not allowed on the couch.
  6. A man goes to the Doctor's "Doctor Doctor, I think I've turned into a dog!"
    "Alright" the Doctor says "Get up on the couch and let me have have a look at you"
    "But i can't, I'm not allowed!"
  7. A man goes to the doctor and says "Doc, I beleive I am a dog"
    Doctor says "Okay, well sit on the couch and we'll talk about it."
    Man says "I'm not allowed on the couch."

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Dogs On Couch One Liners

Which dogs on couch one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with dogs on couch? I can suggest the ones about cats dogs and cat dog.

  1. I had to put my dog down a few hours ago... He was up on the couch for way too long.

Dogs On Couch Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about dogs on couch you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean dog sniffing jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make dogs on couch pranks.

Does your dog bite?

A man walks in the park and sees a man with a dog sitting on a bench.
"Does your dog bite?", asks the first man.
"No"
The man proceeds to pet the dog, but the dog bites him.
"I thought you said your dog didn't bite?!", he says quite angry.
"This is not my dog."
My mom told me this joke, it's from one of the films of 'pink panther'. I've never seen the film though.

A man goes to a psychiatrist and says "You gotta help. I think I'm a dog!"

The psychiatrist says "That's very interesting, why don't you go ahead and lie down on the couch. The man responds "I'm not allowed on the couch."

Several months

It had taken him several months, but the executive vice president had finally persuaded his new secretary to bend over the back of his leather couch and allow him to have s**... with her that way.
"And just where have you been until this hour?" demanded his wife, when the wayward husband finally arrived home.
"Down at the office," he replied, "working like a dog."

My wife and I were laying in bed watching a contortionist perform on a talent show.

As the lady went through her routine, I suggested to my wife that she should try becoming a contortionist. Without hesitation, she shouted "NO!"
I asked her to reconsider, suggesting ideas as they entered my creative mind. She immediately began yelling at me, calling me a pig, a dog, and even threatened to sleep on the couch.
I said "Hey...I thought you said you weren't going to get all bent out of shape."

A guy goes to a psychiatrist and says you gotta help me I think I'm a dog

The psychiatrist says that's very interesting why don't you lay down on the couch. The guy says I'm not allowed on the couch.

I gave my dog my Netflix password

Which ended up being problematic. See, I'm raising him to be an atheist. I came home one day to find him sitting on the couch upset. He said "My whole life is a lie, you've lying to me. I just found out where all dogs go."

Mom's unintentional dirty joke

One night my brother and I were talking to my mom about how my brothers dog is always on the couch.
Mom: "You need to teach your dog to stay off the furniture when you're here with her, your dad will agree."
Brother: "Dad was the first one to let her get on the couch."
Me: "Wow dad is getting soft in his old age."
Mom: "Oh whatever your father is always soft when you boys aren't around."
Layers of unintentional dirtyness