Dog Pooping Jokes
28 dog pooping jokes and hilarious dog pooping puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about dog pooping that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Dog Pooping Short Jokes
Short dog pooping jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The dog pooping humour may include short dog peeing jokes also.
- The thing I don't like about Dietary Fiber is the large poops I'm also not crazy about our dog's name.
- I'm terrible with animals. I had a dog once. The first time I left him alone, he chewed up all my furniture, pooped everywhere, and starved.to death.
- My 9 year old thinks we should name our new dog after her Uncle. When we asked her why, "So when we tell people that Steve pooped in the garage, they'll think it was him!".
True story. - When I get a dog So, when I get a dog, I'll call it Ammay. Everytime it poops, I'll get the Ammay fieces!
- A man walks into a pub holding a dog p**... in his hands He says to his friend "eww, look what I nearly stepped in"
- When a dog is in a p**... position, she's vulnerable, and she's looking to the owner to protect her. When I do the same to my dog I get banned from the dog park
- My new dog is a p**... machine. I tallied each pile as I cleaned up the yard. I stopped counting at 288, because that's two g**....
- I hate my new neighbours... This German Shephard keeps jumping over the fence and p**... on my lawn.
And he has this dog...
Cr
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Dog Pooping One Liners
Which dog pooping one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with dog pooping? I can suggest the ones about dog pee and pooping.
- Why did Kanye name his dog P Diddy? So he can scoop Diddy's poops
- My dog and I are so alike He poops and he is happy
- My friend works at a rubber dog-p**... factory. He'll never get rich, but he makes doo.
- My dog ate a package of peanut butter cups. Now he's p**... out Reeses f**....
- What do you call a police dog p**... outside? Doing his public duty
Dog Pooping Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about dog pooping you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean dog eating jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make dog pooping pranks.
My dog, Grandpa
The other day, my professor asked me what I'd name my dog if I got one.
I said, well I'd name him Grandpa.
That way, when people asked how my day was, I can say things like:
Oh man, I forgot to feed Grandpa today.
I feel bad for leaving Grandpa outside last night.
Grandpa pooped in the living room again.
I had to put grandpa down today.
Grandpa ran away again.
I caught Grandpa h**... my friend's leg again.
And people who don't know me, won't know what I'm talking about.
What does a dog do that a man steps in?
Pants. What's brown and sticky?
A stick.
I'm looking for a third joke with a punchline that appears to be, but isn't, f**... related. Please help me finish my pseudo-p**... dad joke trifecta.
An Indian Chief is sitting under a tree...
An Indian Chief and his son are sitting under a tree, looking out over the plains when his son asks: "Father, why is sister named, Running Deer?"
Chief: "Because, my son, when she was being born I looked out of the teepee and saw a deer running."
Son: "Father, why is brother called Charging Bull?"
Chief: "Because my son, when he was being born I looked out of the teepee and saw a bull running. Why do you ask, p**... Dog?
Dog p**...
Two men are walking on the sidewalk until one of them stops.
"Hey, what's that brown thing on the ground?" he asks his friend.
The second man looks closer to the sidewalk. "Huh, looks like dog p**...," he says.
"Are you sure?"
"Hold on." The man leans down and smells the item. "Ugh, it smells like dog p**...."
"Yeah, but are you positive?"
"Hold on." The man picks up the item and licks it. "Augh! It tastes like dog p**...!" He immediately drops it.
"Okay, so it's dog p**...," the first man says. "Good thing we saw it."
"I know," said his friend. "We could have stepped in that."
Two dogs are sitting in a field.
First dog turns to the second dog and says d**... man you smell like s**...! Have you been rolling in s**...?
Yep.
Wow. That is foul. Is it like a compulsive behavior?
Nope.
Do you do it to cover your scent up, like to ward off predators?
Nope.
Is it some weird f**... that gets you off?
Nope.
Then why would you roll in such pungent p**...!?
So I can sit in peace and not be bothered. Figures it wouldn't work on a German Shepherd
Two guys walking down the road see a pile of dog p**...
One says, "hey that looks like dog p**...". Then he bends over and touches it. He says, "feels like dog p**...". The other bends over and sniffs it. Says, "smells like dog p**...". Then he sticks his finger in it and tastes it. He says "tastes like dog p**...". The other one says, "Well, good thing we didn't step in it!!"
Note: little boys crack right up all the way through with this joke. Something about p**... is enormously funny to boys.
At dinner yesterday evening, the dog was looking up at me trying to mooch for food.
She said, "You're really a great cook! I love the fresh foods you pick, and the seasoning is amazing!"
I glared down at her and said, "Nice try, but after you ate that deer p**... in the yard this afternoon your opinions on food quality don't carry much weight around here."
Just thought of a physics joke in class
One day, Newton adopts a dog to play catch with his apple, naming it Theta. Busy with writing the *Principia*, Newton doesn't notice that Theta has been p**... all over the lawn. When he finally steps outside and sees the mess, he energetically graps his shovel and gets to work.
A visitor asked the neighbor, "Why is the lawn all messed up?", and the neighbor replied, "Oh, Newton's just expending energy. He's madcos(θ).
(Kinetic Energy=Fdcos(θ))
A little Native American boy...
...went to his father to ask how little Native American babies get their name.
"Son, when your oldest brother was born we looked out the teepee and we saw two fighting bears, so we named him Fighting Bear"
"When your other brother was born we looked out and saw a running deer, so we named him Running Deer"
"Why do you ask p**... Dog?"
Indian names
A young Indian boy was very self conscious of his name and wanted to know why he was called what he was. He went to the chief and asked "chief, why have you given me my name?". The chief said "well son, we give our children their names based on what we see when they are born. Like your brother, Running Buffalo, we saw buffalo running when he was born. Your sister, Blue Sky, was so ugly that we had to look up at the sky when she was born. So, why do you ask Two Dogs p**...?"