Dizzy Jokes
32 dizzy jokes and hilarious dizzy puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about dizzy that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Giggle at these dizzy jokes that are sure to make you laugh! From the classic blonde joke to some outrageously bizarre ones, dive into this collection of dizzy jokes and share a chuckle with your friends! Some of the funniest jokes involve a violently sneezing hernia, an ache in the back, and a lot more. If you're ready for some dizzy fun, look no further!
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Funniest Dizzy Short Jokes
Short dizzy jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The dizzy humour may include short light headed jokes also.
- My carbon monoxide detector won't stop beeping. It's giving me a headache, and dizziness, and nausea.
- had to throw out my carbon monoxide detector tonight. All that beeping was giving me a headache and making me dizzy.
- I wish I knew how to turn off my carbon monoxide alarm.... It's been going off for about fifteen minutes and the noise is making really dizzy and lightheaded.
- I've been feeling really dizzy since yesterday I think I need to stop these New Year revolutions.
- Curse the time Patient: Doctor, whenever I get up after a sleep, I feel dizzy for half an hour, then I'm all right.'
Doctor: Then wait for half an hour before getting up. - A man went to a doctor and said Doctor, I feel dizzy for half an hour when I wake up, and then I feel fine To which the doctor replied, Well then, wake up half an hour later!
- Okay, so get this. A guy walks into a bar, the guy gets dizzy because the bar is made out of metal.
- I was attacked at a birthday party by a Mexican man with a baseball bat. Thankfully he was blindfolded and extremely dizzy.
- Doctor: "What seems to be your trouble?"
Patient: "When I get up I feel dizzy for one hour."
Doctor: "Try getting up one hour later."
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Dizzy One Liners
Which dizzy one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with dizzy? I can suggest the ones about fainted and flustered.
- What do you call a dizzy Asian? Disoriented.
- Why did the fisherman always feel dizzy? Because he had an eye-on the-fish-and-sea.
- I was hand washing my clothes the other day... Got a little dizzy during the spin cycle.
- Did you hear about the dizzy marsupial? It was a wobbly wallaby.
- Why are asexual people always dizzy? They're disoriented
- I once met a dyslexic who suffered from vertigo. Her name was Dizzy Spells.
- If you make an oriental dizzy.... does he become disoriented?
- What did the orchestra play to make it so dizzy? A centrifugue
- Why was the geometry teacher so dizzy? Cause he kept going in circles...
Hilarious Dizzy Jokes to Make Your Friends Roar with Laughter
What funny jokes about dizzy you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean shaky jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make dizzy pranks.
Blonde Co-Pilot
This is the story of the poor dizzy blonde flying in a two-seater airplane with just the pilot.
He has a heart attack and dies. She, frantic, calls out for help.
"May Day! May Day! Help me! Help me! My pilot had a heart attack and is dead. And I don't know how to fly. Help me! Please help me!"
She hears a voice over the radio saying:
"This is Air Traffic Control and I have you loud and clear. I will talk you through this and get you back on the ground. I've had a lot of experience with this kind of problem. Now, just take a deep breath. Everything will be fine! First, give me your height and position."
She says, "I'm 5'4" and I'm in the front seat."
"O.K." says the voice on the radio.... "repeat after me: Our Father...Who art in Heaven....."
Vincent Van Gogh's Relatives
His Obnoxious brother: Please Gogh.
His Dizzy aunt: Verti Gogh.
His prune-loving brother: Gotta Gogh.
His Convenience-Store-Owner cousin: Stop'n'Gogh
His Constipated uncle: Can't Gogh
The Ballroom dancer aunt: Tan Gogh
His Nephew psychoanalyst: E Gogh
His Fruit Loving cousin: Man Gogh
His sister who loves disco: Go Gogh
His bouncy little Nephew: Poe Gogh.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
p**... is doing some roofing work for Murphy. He nears the top of the ladder and starts shaking and getting dizzy.
He calls down to Murphy and says "I tink I will ave to go home, I've come all over giddy and feel sick". Murphy asks "Ave yer got vertigo?" p**... replies "No I only live round the corner".
A guy walks into a bar with an octopus
A guy walks into a bar with an octopus. He sits the octopus down on a stool and tells everyone in the bar that this is a very talented octopus that can play any instrument in the world. Everyone laughs, so he says he'll bet $50. A guy walks up with a guitar and sits it beside the octopus. The octopus starts playing better than Jimi Hendrix, so the man pays his $50. Another guy walks up with a trumpet, and the octopus plays it better than Dizzy Gillespie. So the man pays his $50. A third guy walks up with bagpipes. He sits them down and the octopus fumbles with it for a minute and sets it down with a confused look. "Ha!" the man says, "Can't you play it?" The octopus looks up at the man and says, "Play it? I'm going to screw it as soon as I get its pajamas off."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I'm sorry your mother in law is dead
I'm sorry your mother in law is dead he says..how did it happen?
Well it was very unfortunate..she tried to stand up but got dizzy and caught the curtains and ripped them.
oh, thats how she died
no, from the t**... she hit the 65' inch tv and fell on the crystal table.
so, thats how she died
no, fragments hit her and fell on the balcony doors, smashing them and destroying the balcony furniture
well then she died
no. i shot the b**.... she destroyed my whole house
Story of a dizzy blond !!!!
This is a story of a poor dizzy blond flying in a seater airplane with just the pilot.
He has a heart attack and dies. She,frantic,calls out a May Day.
"May day! May day! Help me! Help me! My pilot had a heart attack and is dead and i dont know how to fly. Help me! Please Help me!"
She heards a voice over the radio saying:
"This is air traffic control and i have you loud and clear.i willtalk you through this and get you back on ground. i've had a lot of experience with this kind of problem. Now,just take a deep breath. Everything wil be fine! Now give me your height and position! "
She says , "I'm 5'4 and i'm in front seat."
(Pause)
"O.K." says the voice in the radio.......
"Reapeat after me : Our father who art in heaven"
The best trick...
A cop was waiting outside of a bar because it was free drinks night. The cop was determined to catch all of the drunks so they wouldn't drive. He saw a man walk out the door, the man was limping and had a dizzy look on his face. The cop decided to wait for everyone else from the bar to leave, then he would bust the drunk man. Soon everybody left. The cop walked up to the man and asked him, " are your drunk sir? ". The man didn't respond and just looked at the cop. The cop measured his alcohol level through the mans blood, but it said 0. " how it that possible? " , said the cop. The man responded by saying, " i am tonight's drunk decoy ". :)
