Diy Jokes
40 diy jokes and hilarious diy puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about diy that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article features a selection of DIY jokes suitable for any occasion. Whether you're looking for something to put in a DIY Christmas cracker, a Tupperware kit or an appliance for April Fools, we have the perfect joke for your needs. Enjoy the laughs and have fun creating your own jokes with these DIY ideas!
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Funniest Diy Short Jokes
Short diy jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The diy humour may include short kit jokes also.
- I wanted to buy some literature on DIY shelving Sounds easy, but try going into a book store and asking if they have "any books on shelves"
- How many DIY buffs does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but it takes two weeks and four trips to the hardware store.
- How many DIY-ers does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, but about a dozen light bulbs.
- Sean Connery had a load of books fall on his head, thanks to dodgy DIY He has only his shelf to blame
- The worst thing about living next door to MC Hammer is the constant DIY noise. I shouted 'Stop!' but if anything that made it worse.
(Gary Delaney) - I went to the DIY shop I went to the DIY shop and bought a curtain rail. The shop assistant asked if I was putting it up myself. I replied "no you dirty sod. I'm putting it up in the dining room"
- I saw a woman busted for shoplifting at the DIY store today. She had a ladder in her stocking.
- I think my new idea for DIY orthodontics is going to take the world by storm. brace yourself
- I just got an awesome "Do it yourself" robot. The DIY-HANDYBOT 2.0 Me: "Could you build me a cupboard?"
Handybot: "Do it yourself." - My friend told me that his DIY liquid rocket made it to space... I told him to quit being hypergolic.
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Diy One Liners
Which diy one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with diy? I can suggest the ones about franchise and handyman.
- I wrote a book on DIY. It comes with a free pen.
- I walked into a DIY shop There wasn't a single assistant
- I bought a book on DIY. So far my dad has read me 103 pages of it.
- Trump didn't finish the wall He's just another middle-aged man failing on a DIY project
- What did the homicidal inventor say to his last victim? Time to DIY
- Being single means you're a true DIY-er. They even have websites and videos to help!
- A DIY kidney transplant... ...is a home renalvation.
- DIY advice from Sean Connery Check your shelf before you wreck your shelf
- I bought a few pieces for my DIY orchestra today some ensemble acquired.
- I'm addicted to DIY repairs. I can't stop thinking about my next fix.
- We need a new name for the Bible. How about: DIY Salvation
- Ikea is Swedish for DIY
- How do you call a Jew with a gas tank? A DIY-er.
- Why does Sean Connery s**... at DIY? A lack of shelf awareness.
- For me, going to a home improvement store is like having s**.... It's all about DIY.
Hilarious Fun Diy Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about diy you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean manufacturer jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make diy pranks.
A man was doing some DIY work on his gas stove
When it all of a sudden blew up and sent him flying through his roof and up into the sky.
On his way up he passed a man falling down from the sky and asked him: Hey, you know anything about gas stoves?
The guy falling responded, Nope, you know anything about parachutes?
Methylated Spirit
A scruffy homeless man walks into a DIY store.
"Bottle of methylated spirit please."
"Look mate, no offense but I wasn't born yesterday. I can't sell that to you when I know you're just gonna drink it."
"Hey, what are you implying? This is ridiculous, I'm using it for woodwork!"
"All right, all right..." says the shopkeeper, taking a bottle of the shelf.
"Oh, haven't you got a cold one?"
Did you hear? Rob Schneider is starting his own DIY electrical wiring protection company?
It's called **You Conduit!**
Failed DIY project
I thought it would be cool to tar up my driveway, but it ended up looking hideous. Can't even blame anyone, it's my own s**... asphalt.
Handyman goes to court
So this handyman was caught working without a license. He was a bit of a diy guy and had decided to fix some things himself, but wasn't licensed to do so and they weren't up to standard.
In the court, the judge received a note from his assistant and immediately declare him guilty for working without a license and for bribing.
Turns out he had done some jury rigging.
Ikea failed miserably at processed meat products business
Someone ordered meatballs and Ikea sends them a cow with DIY instructions
Trump said he would build a wall but he hasn't even picked up a brick yet.
He's just another middle aged man failing at a DIY project.
A guy at the DIY store asked if I wanted decking...
...fortunately I managed to get the first punch in.
The worst thing about living next door to MC Hammer is the constant DIY noise...
I shouted, "Stop!" but if anything, that made things worse!