Disney Jokes

Funniest Disney Short Jokes

Short disney jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The disney humour may include short mickey jokes also.

1. Disney now owns Star Wars, Marvel, Indiana Jones, Disney world and the Simpsons. If they acquire my parent's divorce they will own my entire childhood.
2. I have two conditions in my will... 1) I want my remains spread around Disney World
   2) I do not want to be cremated
3. Two blondes are going to Disney Land At the turn off, they see a sign saying "Disneyland left"
   They went home crying.
4. JUST ANNOUNCED: Disney in talks of a Star Wars - Back to the Future crossover where Marty flies so far back in time (long, long ago) that he fuses with his car He becomes the ManDeLorean
5. A million or more lab rats die each year and my fiance screams at me for running over a mouse. That's the last time we're going to Disney.
6. Why did Walt Disney fire Snow White? 'Cause she kept sitting on Pinocchios' face singing 'tell me lies, tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies'.
   *Joke's from my Dad and his friend*
7. When I die I'd like my remains to be scattered at Disney Land... Also, I don't want to be cremated.
8. What's the difference between michael jackson and Disney Movies ? Disney Movies still touch kids
9. What's the difference between Disney and PornHub? Disney teaches you to hate your stepmother.
10. Rick Astley asked for my Disney films the other day. I said, you can have Cars and Toy Story, but I'm never gonna give you Up.

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Disney One Liners

Which disney one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with disney? I can suggest the ones about disney movie and walt disney.

1. Mickey mouse "Doc, my knees hurt!" Doctor: Which knee?
   Mickey: Disney
2. I just unsubscribed from Disney+ I feel marveless
3. How do you hydrate a 2 year old at Disney World? Gatorade
4. Did you hear about the new Disney FastPass? Skip the lines, go straight to the ICU
5. Which Disney character won the Nobel prize? Gaston
6. [Scottish]What's the difference between Bing Crosby and Walt Disney? Bing sings, and Walt disnae.
7. What do you call an emo kids cartoon? Disney XD.
8. Did you hear Disney is making Austin Powers into a Jedi? It's called Obi-have
9. What was the cannibal's favorite Disney song? You've got a friend in me.
10. Jasmine tried to attend a "Disney Prince Only" gathering She wasn't Aladdin.
11. Which knee is Mickey's favorite knee? Disney
12. The Seahawks were going to go to Disney World... but they decided to pass.
13. Disney world is reopening today It's about to be an even smaller world
14. Why is Gaston the most peaceful Disney villain? Because he won the No-Belle Prize
15. What happens once a year and only at a graveyard? Mother's Day for Disney characters.

Disney Movie Jokes

Here is a list of funny disney movie jokes and even better disney movie puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What do Disney movies and coathangers have in common? They can both bring out the child from within.
• My girlfriend told me to stop watching Disney movies and be a man. Does anyone know how to be swift as the coursing river?
• Disney has announced that all future Marvel movies will have an all male cast. They are doing their part to combat the heroine epidemic.
• This just popped in my head... What's a mexican's favorite Disney movie?
  Mow lawn.
  Sorry.
• Disney really gets the Star Wars fanbase... After 3 movies, our expectations are now Solo...
• We just finished watching the new Disney movie, Incandescent. It was a light comedy.
• What is the dairy farmer's favorite Disney movie? Moo-ana
• They told me I couldn't bring my favourite Disney movie to class yesterday But I showed them Up.
• What do you call a disney movie about antique cooking wares pewter pan
• Just seen a Disney trailer. I've just seen a Disney trailer
  It said, "A new movie from the people that brought you Up."
  Flipping Heck! I never knew Mum and Dad made films.

Disney World Jokes

Here is a list of funny disney world jokes and even better disney world puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I just got a lifetime ban for spreading my wife's remains around Disney World Guess we should of had her cremated first
• When I die, I want my remains to be scattered throughout Disney world. I don't want to be cremated.
• How do Disney princesses screw in a lightbulb? They hold the bulb in the socket and wait for the world to revolve around them.
• I got in line behind an old classmate of mine while vacationing at Disney World... I said "Wow, it's a small world!"
  She said, "actually this is Pirates of the Caribbean."
• Did you hear about the woman banned from Disney World? She kept sitting on Pinocchio's face and screaming, "Lie to me, Pinocchio! Lie to me!"
• Went to Disney World because my daughter is obsessed with Mickey Mouse. She was so excited when I got home and told her.
• I got in touch with my inner self today at Disney World I can't believe that a multi billion dollar company can't afford 3 ply toilet paper.
• Did you hear about the new Roller Coaster at Disney World Florida? It's called the Coronacoaster. It just keeps going up and up until everyone on it dies.
• What do Disney World & you're girlfriend have in common? They both make you wait 2 hours for a 30 second ride.
• What kind of government does Disney World have? A plutocracy

Disney Princess Jokes

Here is a list of funny disney princess jokes and even better disney princess puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Whos the funniest disney princess? raPUNzel
  *sits there laughing to self*
  ...so lonely..
• Which Disney princess would be the best judge? Snow White, because she's the Fairest One of All.
• Heard a rumor that Iron Man is going to be the newest Disney Princess... ...they're always on the lookout for a strong Fe male character.
• What's the name of the Disney princess that got burned? Cinder-ella
• I heard Disney is making a princess that's more pc to viewers. She's said to resemble Rapunzel. Except instead of letting down her hair, she lets down everyone in her life.
• Which Disney Princess is always on dating apps? Tinderella.
• My daughter wanted a Disney Princess birthday party… …so I made all her friends come over and clean my house.
• Why didn't the Disney Princess go to the doctor when she got sick? Because the cold never bothered her anyway.
• A Disney princess was arrested by mistake They thought it was someone Elsa.
• My daughter wanted to have a Disney princess tea party. I couldn't find the tea or the dresses, so I settled for Taco Belle.

Walt Disney Jokes

Here is a list of funny walt disney jokes and even better walt disney puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• The Haunted mansion opened three years after Walt Disney died. It's what Walt would have haunted
• Why did Walt Disney visit a mechanic? He wanted to get his Car tuned
• Ok I have a Scottish joke: Sam Wanamaker, Immanuel Kant. Sammy Cahn… … but Walt Disney.
• I went to see Walt Disney on ice It was a bit disappointing, just an old bloke in a freezer.
• If I could bring one dead person back to life I'd bring back Walt Disney.
  Just to show him the shows on Disney channel and see his reaction...
• In a recent interview about the state of the Disney empire... ... Walt Disney responded with no comment.
• It's Walt Disney's birthday today I wonder what his ice age is...
• How do you access the task manager on a Disney-brand PC? You press "Ctrl+Walt+Delete"
• What did Walt Disney have to say about "OK"? "It's a small word after all"
• What's Walt Disney's favorite Disney movie? Frozen

Great Disney Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends

What funny jokes about disney you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean disney world jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make disney pranks.