Disgustin Jokes
114 disgustin jokes and hilarious disgustin puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about disgustin that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Comical & Quirky Disgustin Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
What is a good disgustin joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A vegan said to me people who sell meat are disgusting.
I said people who sell fruit and vegetables are grocer.
Just found the absolute worst page in the dictionary
What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest and disingenuous.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Amy Schumer gets mad when people describe her as fat, s**..., and disgusting..
because she doesn't like when people steal her material.
I was sitting on a bus with a friend and he told me this joke...
What do you do if you see an Epileptic having a fit in the bath?
Throw in your laundry.
The guy behind us leaned over and said "I think that's disgusting. My son died in the bath whilst having a fit."
We both went white and apologised. The guy got up to get off and said, "he choked on a sock."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A woman was forced to choose between two suitors to wed.
The first man was about 4 foot 5 tall and ran a very successful store that sold many fruits and vegetables.
The other man was disgusting. He was covered head to toe in boils and bedsores and smelled awful. He had not ever even seen a bath. He was pretty much the most foul human you could imagine.
Yet the woman wed the second man.
Because no matter how g**... you pictured him to be...
The first man was just a little grocer.
The guy was in the store buying a fake Christmas tree.
The shop attendant asked him, "Are you going to put that tree up yourself?"
The guy replied, "Don't be disgusting! I'm going to put it in the living room!"
My girlfriend's parents called me a disgusting creep just because I am 36 and she is 24
What a horrible thing to say on our son's 10th birthday party.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A young korean couple are lying in bed...
When the guy starts f**... nonstop.
The girl, unable to take the smell, says, "Stop, that's disgusting!"
"Don't blame me", the guy says. "It's the dog."
"Oh, don't blame him", she says. "He was cooked perfectly."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Sometimes I wonder about my ex girlfriends who I haven't seen in years,
you know, like has she become all fat and bloated, or has she become disgustingly skinny; or maybe someone has already found the body.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
It's disgusting. They used to make COCA-Cola with REAL c**...! So you can probably guess what they used to make shamPOO with!
Yep, child labour.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My girlfriend told me I was disgusting for l**... the bowl after I finished.
I guess she's used to most people just flushing.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
On the bus today, I saw an attractive young woman breastfeeding
Suddenly an old woman started shouting, "you shouldn't be doing that in public, that's disgusting!!!".
A part of me wanted to scold the old woman, but another part of me thinks...
"Maybe I shouldn't have been m**... on a bus..."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An apple and a p**... were floating down the river.
The p**... yells: "Apple, apple, come play with me." The apple says: "No! Ew! Stay away from me!"
A little further down the river the p**... yells again, "Apple, apple, come play with me." The apple disgustingly replies, "No! Ew! Stay away from me!"
Suddenly a man grabs the apple out the river and takes a bite. The p**... shouts to apple, "See you tomorrow!"
My wife made me dinner the other day. She got offended when I put down my knife and fork and said, "This dinner is disgusting"
then my wife said, "Well, boil your own toast next time then"
Dad, are bugs good to eat..?
A boy asks his father, "Dad, are bugs good to eat?" "That's disgusting. Don't talk about things like that over dinner," the dad replies. After dinner the father asks, "Now, son, what did you want to ask me?" "Oh, nothing," the boy says. "There was a bug in your soup, but now it's gone."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Is he s**...? Yes. Is he disgusting? Absolutely. Did he act in a v**... manner towards women? Certainly.
But he's not running for President, his wife is.
A particularly dirty shabby looking woman asks for couple of dollars
A woman was walking down the street when she was
accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking
homeless woman who asked her for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The woman took out her wallet, extracted ten dollars
and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy
some wine with it instead of dinner?"
"No," I had to stop drinking years ago, the homeless
woman replied.
"Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying
food?" the woman asked.
"No," I don't waste time shopping, the homeless woman
said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay
alive."
"Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of
food?" the woman asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless woman. "I haven't
had my hair done in 20 years!"
"Well," said the woman, I'm not going to give you the
money. Instead, I'm going t o take you out for dinner
with my husband and myself
tonight.
The homeless Woman was astounded. "Won't your husband
be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty,
and I probably smell pretty disgusting."
The woman replied, "That's okay. It's important for
him to see what a woman looks like after she has given
up shopping, hair appointments and wine.
A vegan said to me : people who sell meat are disgusting
I replied with : people who sell fruit and vegetables are grocer
People say cannibals are disgusting human beings
But this one tastes pretty good
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A plumber rings the doorbell
"Come in", says the homeowner, Stacy.
"Hi, I am the plumber, sorry for being a bit late"
"That's fine, my sister must have called for you"
"Alright. So where's that disgusting clogged up mess?"
"Her name actually is Rita, and she's not home at the moment".
The teacher asks, "Flora, what part of the human body increases ten times when excited?"
Flora blushes and says, "That's disgusting, I won't even answer that question." The teacher calls on Johnny: "What part of the human body increases ten times when excited?" "That's easy," says Johnny. "It's the pupil of the eye." "Very good, Johnny," responds the teacher. "That's correct." She then turns to Flora and says, "First, you didn't do your homework. Second, you have a dirty mind. And third, you're in for a BIG disappointment."
Lance Armstrong
I think it is just terrible and disgusting how everyone has treated Lance Armstrong. Especially after what he achieved, winning 7 Tour de France races while on drugs. When I was on drugs, I couldn't even find my bike
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