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Discovered Jokes

114 discovered jokes and hilarious discovered puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about discovered that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Discovered Short Jokes

Short discovered jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The discovered humour may include short discovery jokes also.

  1. Just spent $300 on a limousine and discovered that the fee doesn't include a driver Can't believe I've spent all that money and I have nothing to chauffeur it...
  2. I just discovered that the word 'nothing' is a palindrome... Backwards it spells 'gnihton', which also means nothing.
  3. Scientists have discovered another deadly pathogen they are calling the Peekaboo virus. Doctors are sending anyone with peekaboo straight to ICU.
  4. A new strain of head lice has been discovered which is resistant to conventional treatments. That has left scientists scratching their heads.
  5. My fencing opponent laughed at me for bringing a block of cheddar to a sword fight. Until he discovered it was extra sharp.
  6. My friend told me about a wonder food that he discovered that contains protein, fiber, and good fats "That's nut!" I exclaimed.
  7. I recently discovered I can move my sister's daughters through the air with my brain but not her sons. I think I have telekinieces.
  8. Donald Trump has announced that he plan to extend his wall across the oceans... This news came after he discovered that a man named Jesus managed to walk on water.
  9. Today I discovered someone had stolen my activation for Microsoft Office... I don't know who you but I will find you, you have my word.
  10. TodayI discovered that Jehovah's Witnesses don't celebrate halloween... I guess they don't appreciate random people knocking on their doors

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Discovered One Liners

Which discovered one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with discovered? I can suggest the ones about invented and founded.

  1. If a Viking discovers religion Is he Bjorn again?
  2. A frog decided to trace his genealogy one day... He discovered he was a tad Polish.
  3. A man came home to discover that someone had stolen all his lamp. He was delighted.
  4. Scientists have discovered a planet populated entirely by robot. They call it Mars.
  5. I've just discovered that I'm allergic to cats. Either that or I undercooked it.
  6. Just discovered whiteboards Remarkable
  7. BREAKING NEWS: Scientists have discovered an amazing fact about icebergs... More below.
  8. New lesbian species of dinosaur discovered. Lickalottapus.
  9. Yo mama fell down... The physicists discovered Gravitational waves today
  10. Ornithologists in Peru have discovered that owls hunt there in pairs They're Inca hoots.
  11. I discovered the number one reason OP never delivers. #
  12. Scientists have discovered the new element AH The element of suprise
  13. I think I discovered a really simple cure for anorexia. It's a piece of cake.
  14. I must be an archeologist when I sleep because I discovered Mybackissaur and Myneckissaur
  15. I discovered where they keep all the dad jokes The dad-a-base...

Astronomers Discovered Jokes

Here is a list of funny astronomers discovered jokes and even better astronomers discovered puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • After Astronomers discovered the Earth rotates about an axis... They got bored and decided to call it a day!
  • Astronomers discover a new object bigger than the "Great Attractor" ur mum
Discovered joke, Astronomers discover a new object bigger than the "Great Attractor"

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about discovered can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of discovered puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Witty Discovered Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun with Friends

What funny jokes about discovered you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean developed jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make discovered prank.

Tea is an evil substance. It is much more dangerous than beer.

I discovered this last night. I drank 15 beers up until 3 am in the pub while my wife was just at home drinking tea.
You should have seen how mad and violent she was when I got home. She threw the chair at me and kept screaming at the top of her lungs. On the other hand, I was quiet and peaceful and silently made my way to bed. But she kept cursing and shouting through the night and well into the next morning.
Please friends, if you can't handle your tea, you should not be drinking it. Please avoid drinking tea.

I've just discovered that I have a logic f**....

I can't stop coming to conclusions.

Scientists have discovered a new type of polar bear. It can live in both the North and South poles, is prone to extreme mood swings and has shown interest in other bears of both genders.

It's a bi-polar bipolar bi polar bear

A hole has been discovered in the fence that surrounds a nudist camp.

Authorities are looking into it.

Scientists discovered a revolutionary material with infinite length and zero depth

... but then they realized No Man's Sky was invented already.

Scientists discovered that unvaccinated kids are less likely to be autistic.

Because they are more likely to be dead.

Woman visits a bank on downtown NYC...

...and asks for a short-term $10,000 loan. Banker asks her for collateral, and she hands him the keys to her Mercedes. She says she's going on a vacation, and will return the following week to repay the debt and retrieve her car.
Week later, she picks up the vehicle and pays back the loan, plus $50 interest.
Banker says, "Thanks for doing business with us. But, while you were away, we did a bit of research and discovered you are an extremely wealthy woman. Why did you need a loan?"
She replied, "Where else can I park my vehicle for $50 for a week in NYC?"

Took my kids to the dinosaur museum today.

Spent the whole day looking up at the giant sculptures , I discovered a new species.
Myneckisaur.
This is my first dad joke post :)

News has just come in that The Mars Rover has discovered a member of the feline species while exploring.

Unfortunately, Curiosity killed the cat.

How to use and 5 times in a row grammatically

A man owned a store called This And That and hired another man to make a sign for it.
When it was finished the owner inspected the work.
He discovered that the spaces were wrong so he said, The space between This and And and And and That is different. Please fix it

A woman was robbed...

...but upon coming home she discovered that nothing was stolen apart from her lightbulbs.
She was delighted

Water p**...

When my three-year-old son opened the birthday gift from his grandmother, he discovered a water p**.... He squealed with delight and headed for the nearest sink.
I was not so pleased. I turned to Mom and said, ''I'm surprised at you. Don't you remember how we used to drive you crazy with water guns?''
Mom smiled and replied, ''Yes dear - I remember very well...''

My girlfriend accidentally discovered a way to get long lashes instantly

By showing a bit of ankles in Saudi Arabia

In honor of 3/14... TIL the man who discovered Pi had his wife, Edith, leave him over his obsession with math.

Which just goes to show you, you can't have your Pi and Edith too.

Scientists have discovered why flamingos stand on one leg

Because if they lifted the other one as well, they'd fall.

It was a sad and disappointing day when I discovered my Universal Remote Control did not, in fact, control the Universe.

Not even remotely.
(I stole this joke from fb and it made my drunk a**... laugh out loud so I wanted to share but I'm sorry if it's a repost)

A human f**... can be louder than a t**....

I discovered that at my daughter's school concert.

A man named Eric Cole...

... discovered that there was a direct correlation between the amount of mayonnaise on his cabbage salad and how good it tastes.
He's calling this correlation Cole's Law.

Archeologists have just discovered the oldest known t**....

They just dont know what period it's from.

"Bedroom" is an anagram of "Boredom"

How cool is that? My girlfriend discovered it during s**....

A pastor discovered his bicycle had been stolen

He decided to use it as inspiration for that week's sermon, and began writing on the Ten Commandments, especially thou shalt not steal
Then he got to thou shalt not commit adultery and remembered where he left his bike.

I just discovered a major difference between me and Rapunzel.

Rapunzel lets her hair down but I let everybody near me down.

So aliens flew by our planet recently and one asked the other...

Alien 1 How advanced is that civilization?
Alien 2 They have discovered nuclear technology.
Alien 1 Oh boy... That's pretty intelligent. We better keep our distance then from their missles.
Alien 2 Nah, they're not that smart yet. They have em pointed at themselves.

I've just discovered the quickest way to call a family meeting.

I turned off the WiFi router and simply waited in the room where it's located.

I discovered that my socks exhibit quantum entanglement.

As soon as I put on my left sock, the other sock immediately becomes the right sock, and vice versa, regardless of the distance between them.

I used to be on of those chefs who shouts and swears a lot

But then I discovered oven mitts

In his quest to gain more power, the mad scientist extended his hours at the lab.

This is after he discovered that power is work overtime.

I've just discovered that the kids next door stole my credit card to pay for their Mom's b**... job

Just wait till I get my hands on them!

Have you heard the story of the two skunks named In and Out?

They lived in the forest with their mother skunk. And whenever In was in, Out was out. And whenever In was out, Out was in.
One day, when In was out and Out was in, mother skunk said to Out, "Out, I need you to go out and bring In in."
So Out went out and immediately brought In in.
And their mother asked, "My, that was fast! Out, how did you find In so quickly?"
And Out said, "It was easy. Instinct."
(a favorite of mine from when I was young that I recently re-discovered in an old joke book)

I've discovered that 1+1 can, in fact, equal 3.

Because I wasn't wearing a c**....

I was depressed, after some soul searching I discovered I s**... indentify as Mistletoe..

I can't wait to hang myself on Christmas.

A state surveyor visits a Maine farm.

He tells the old farmer that it's been discovered that his farm may actually be in New Hampshire, and not Maine. After several days of surveying, checking and rechecking, the surveyor tells the old farmer "Yep, I was right, your farm is in New Hampshire, not Maine."
"Good thing," says the old farmer, "Couldn't take another one of those Maine winters."

An unpublished manuscript of Hemingway's last novel has been discovered. It's about a man in his seventies trying to learn programming.

The Old Man and the C.

Took my kids to the dinosaur museum today. Spent the whole day looking up at the giant sculptures , I discovered a new species.

Myneckisaur.

I discovered my mother in law has weekly sessions with l**... himself on how to be even more vicious.

I've no idea what kind of fees she's charging him.

Archeologists in Egypt have discovered a mummy covered in chocolate and hazelnuts.

They believe it to be Pharaoh Rocher.

A wife tells her husband that she's discovered his secret f**... via his search history...

"It was a weird one for sure," she says, "but I think I can make it work without being too embarrassed, as long as you don't film it." He accepts.
Later that night, he asks her if she wants to try it. She smiles, begins to undress, and goes "SKIPPITY BEE BOP BEE BOP DUP-A DUAAA"

t**...

At New York's Kennedy Airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square and a calculator. Authorities believe he is a member of the notorious al-Gebra movement. He is being charged with carrying weapons of math instruction.

It was a sad and disappointing day

when I discovered my universal remote control did not in fact control the universe.
Not even remotely.

My wife recently discovered I was cheating after she found all those letters I'd been hiding.

She got really mad and said she's never going to play Scrabble with me again.

After years of research, scientists discovered bees are allergic to pollen

Turns out when exposed to pollen, bees develop hives

An entomologist walks into a bar and orders a grasshopper.

An entomologist walks into a bar and orders a grasshopper. "We haven't seen you in a while. How is your research going?" the bartender asks. "Great. I've actually had quite a breakthrough. I've discovered that praying mantises don't all follow the same religion," the entolomolgist says. "They're in sects."

An archeologist walks into a bar

An archeologist walks into a bar, orders a beer and gives a heavy sigh. "What's wrong?" the bartender asks. "I thought I discovered a fully intact dinosaur skeleton at my dig yesterday," the archeologist laments. "Sadly, upon further excavation today it turns out that it was just a fossil arm."

Recently, a group of scientists discovered...

a subclass of ant has a genetic mutation that makes them grow larger than average, DESPITE missing a jointed segment on their legs. This same mutation also causes them to have an aversion to dairy-based foods, even with their high based sugar content.
TL;DR lack-toes-in-taller-ants

A European m**... goes to an African tribe...

... and asks the tribeleader if he may stay with them. The leader agrees on one condition: No white child can be born.
However, 9 months later, a woman is discovered with a white child.
The leader summons the missonary to explain himself. The m**... looks out the window and shows the leader a herd of sheep and says:
" As you can see, all the sheep are white, yet one of them is black... "
In complete distress, the tribeleader exclaims: " Allright, I won't say anything about your child, as long as you don't say anything about the sheep!"

All the letters were having a discussion.

Suddenly they discovered letter T is absent. They called him up and T said, "wait I'm in the middle of something."
(Might be a s**... joke but I made it myself, hence posting)

Egyptian joke

A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt. Archaeologists believe it may be Pharaoh Rocher.

Scientists have recently discovered a new bioluminescent bug that performs a strange dance any time there is a full moon.

They are calling it a Raving Luna Tick.

Two Aliens meet at a Bar in Deep Space

Two Aliens meet in a bar in deep space.
**First Alien:** On my way here I passed a beautiful blue world, 2/3 covered by water, The dominant race have discovered Satellite technology and Harnessed the power of nuclear weapons for defense.
**Second Alien:** Interesting, so it looks like we have an emerging intelligence in the Galaxy.
**First Alien:** That is what i thought but then I realized they pointed them at themselves.

A man is in an airplane from Miami to Paris

And a stunning gorgeous woman seats by his side. He's the eager to start a conversation.
"So, what are you doing in Paris?"
"I'm a scientist, I research s**..."
The man is now tempted:
"What have you discovered about s**... in your research?"
"I came to find that Native Americans have the longest p**... and Spanish can last the longest in bed. By the way, I'm Carol, what's your name?"
"I'm Sitting Bull Hernandez, nice to meet you"

Movie theater madness

A young lad did some work for a farmer and when he was done was given a goose as barter payment. He tucked the goose under his arm and began walking home. As he was passing through town he noticed that a movie that he wanted to see was playing at the theater. Since they didn't allow animals he stuffed the goose down his pants, paid for his ticket and found a seat in the packed theater next to two old ladies as the lights dimmed.
The goose began to struggle and not wanting to be discovered, the young man inconspicuously unzipped his fly so that the goose could breathe. Shortly thereafter, one of the old ladies nudged the other, "Edna, the boy sitting next to me has his fly unzipped and something is sticking out!"
"Martha", her companion replied,"When you've seen one you've seen 'em all."
"Well you've never seen one like this before. It's eating my popcorn!"

An old snake

"Doc, I need something for my eyes...can't see well these days". The Doc fixes him up with a pair of glasses and tells him to return in 2 weeks.
The snake comes back in 2 weeks and tells the doctor he's very depressed.
Doc says, "What's the problem...didn't the glasses help you?"
"The glasses are fine, doc. I just discovered I've been living with a water hose the past 2 years!"

The day after Beethoven's f**...

The day after Beethoven's f**..., at midnight, a drunken man, having just left the bar, went into the graveyard, where he heard a strange sound. Looking for the source of the mysterious sound, he discovered it was coming from Beethoven's grave. Alarmed, he called his friends, and found they could hear the sound too (even the sober ones).
Soon, a crowd was forming at the graveyard. The mayor, who was very familiar with classical music, recognized the sound as Beethoven's 9th Symphony played backwards. When it ended, Beethoven's 8th Symphony started playing, also backwards, and then the 7th, and then the 6th, and so forth. At dawn, having reached a conclusion, the mayor said to the gathering crowd:
"There's nothing to fear, gentlemen. He's just decomposing."

Using the new James Webb telescope, scientists recently discovered an enormous object in deep space that shares nearly identical chemical composition as humor in the human brain.

Ultimately it was determined to be no laughing matter

Why 6 was really afraid of 7

6 was just a normal girl, she met 7 on a dating app. They went out several times after that and a few dates later 7 proposed. 6 was ecstatic, they got married within the month and when they moved into a new house they quickly made friends with their neighbors, 9 and 10. 6 soon noticed strange behavior in 7, he was going out late at night to other people's houses. One night 6 saw 7 leave into the neighbors house. She decided to follow him in and was horrified. Blood stains led up to the darkened kitchen where she discovered some thing she could never unsee. 7 had done it. 7 8 9.

I discovered this new drug that makes you indifferent to the world...

It's called Crystal Meh.

A stand-up comedian tells a joke about a newly-discovered STI that takes ten years to show symptoms.

\* Slow clap *

An engineer wakes up one morning and goes downstairs.

He sees a note an the fridge from his wife. It read This isn't working. I'm at my mother's. He opened the fridge and discovered it was working just fine.

I discovered that my boyfriend is a communist spy.

I guess I could have noticed this sooner, but chose to ignore the red flags.

Discovered joke, I discovered that my boyfriend is a communist spy.

jokes about discovered

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these discovered jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.