Disappointed Jokes
132 disappointed jokes and hilarious disappointed puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about disappointed that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Disappointed Short Jokes
Short disappointed jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The disappointed humour may include short dissatisfied jokes also.
- Prisoner: I'm sorry I tried to escape. Guard: I'm not mad, just........disappointed.
Remember, kids, never let your guard down. - It turns out, 'Fox News' has no actual coverage of foxes. I was also disappointed by BBC news.
- There's a support group for people addicted to plastic surgery... The head of the group walks in and says, "I'm seeing a lot of new faces this week, and I have to say I'm pretty disappointed."
- "Hello everyone, welcome to plastic surgery Addicts Anonymous." "I see a lot of new faces here tonight, and I have to say I'm pretty disappointed."
- Plastic surgery anonymous "Hello everyone, welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous, I see a lot of new faces here today and I have to say I'm really disappointed with you all..."
- What's the difference between my parents and my girlfriend? I don't need to take my pants off to disappoint my parents.
Also, my parents are real. - I was disappointed to have to pay for my new roof they promised me it would be on the house
- I'm not that into threesomes If I wanted to disappoint 2 people at once, I'd just talk to my parents.
- My bank account was hacked!!! The hacker was so disappointed, he started a fundraiser for me.
- Dear Fox News..... I have yet to see any news about foxes.
Sincerely, Disappointed viewer.....
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Disappointed One Liners
Which disappointed one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with disappointed? I can suggest the ones about bummed and unhappy.
- Welcome to Masturbators Anonymous. I'm disappointed that you all came today.
- "You look like a million bucks", said bill gates disappointedly to his wife.
- Hey baby are you my GPA? Because you look like you'd disappoint my parents.
- This sub is really disappointing me lately. I'm going to try the meatballs next time.
- Why was Leia disappointed on her wedding night? Han shot first.
- I bought a DVD on dealing with disappointment. When I opened it, the box was empty.
- Not only am I the master of suspense... ...I'm also the master of disappointing endings.
- I made an appointment but it was cancelled. It was ... disappointing.
- They say you are what you eat I don't remember eating a big disappointment
- My bloodtype is really disappointing. My doctor keeps saying "be positive".
- My kids and this punchline have a lot in common. They're both a disappointment.
- What do you call a disappointed giant? A sighclops
- My doctor cancelled my visit today. I was Disappointed.
- What do you call a disappointed cat? *sigh*amise
- I find it disappointing that the word "stealth" doesn't have a silent letter in it.
Humorous Disappointed Jokes to Bring Fun and Laughter to Your Life
What funny jokes about disappointed you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean surprised jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make disappointed pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I can't believe that you've been visiting prostitutes for s**..., my wife screamed at me. I'm really disappointed.
You can hardly blame me, I answered. It's not like I was getting any from you.
Well, that's your own fault, she replied. You never told me you were willing to pay for it.
I can't describe how disappointed I am...
...that the Congo weren't in single file in the Olympic Opening Ceremony
I bought a CD of ice cream van music.
Now I drive with the stereo on full blast, watching the disappointment on all the little kids faces..
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I walked out of my local shop today...
...and outside was a t**.... Same guy as always, but I'd never talked to him before. As I passed, he said, "Excuse me, I don't suppose you have a spare cigarette I can have?". I looked around, and I was the only person in the vacinity, so I knew he was talking to me. "Sorry mate, I don't smoke." I replied, which is true. He looked disappointed, but then asked hopefully "Any change?", I thought for a second before answering "Nope, still don't smoke."
I'm going to buy 100 mounted fish and fill a room with them.
When someone comes over and asks where the bathroom is, I'll send them to that room instead. As soon as they come back disappointed, I'll say, "I'm sorry, I thought you said my bassroom!"
Lourdes
A wheel-chair bound chap decided to visit the healing waters of Lourdes. It was very crowded but he spotted a gap and went for it at such a pace that he ended up in the pool, wheel-chair and all. When they fished him out he was quite disappointed to find that he was still unable to walk, but found consolation in the fact that his wheel chair had a brand new set of tires.
I was told to bring a box of tissues with me when my friends and I watched Bambi.
You can imagine my disappointment.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Offensive Joke: The principal of my daughter's elementary school wanted to talk me about her behavior.
Apparently she was making racist remarks towards the black kids in her class and insulting them.
I must say I am terrified and very disappointed, she isn't even allowed to talk to them.
Why is it not a good idea to tell your parents about your failures while they are on an elevator?
It would cause them to be disappointed on many different levels.
I don't know who this Rorschach guy is, but he is really good at drawing pictures of my disappointed father.
Credit to one of the writers of the Daily Show when I saw him do stand up, but I don't remember the name.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Tried to cash in on this kid joke thing. My daughter is a disappointment.
Why did the skeleton cross the road? He didn't because he doesn't have skin and he just fell apart.
Auto-correct is so crazy now a days...
My mom meant to text me 'I love you' but it auto corrected to 'You're a disappointment.'
Dad my girlfriends pregnant
"Dad, my girlfriend's pregnant."
"I'm not mad, just disappointed."
"Hi disappointed, I'm dad."
"Did you jus..."
"Yes."
"You're ready."
"I'm not ready, I just told you that I'm dad."
I was disappointed when it turned out the axe I bought to climb with was useless for the job...
it was an anti-climb axe
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My daughter's boyfriend came round.
"Don't even think about having s**... with her," I told him, while she was in the toilet.
"OK, sir. I understand," he panicked.
"Good," I replied, "I wouldn't want you to be as disappointed as I was."
Was very disappointed when I went into a German restaurant and asked for their best
but they served me their wurst
Two things I learned from online dating
geography and disappointment
When I was a kid my mom told me I could become whatever I wanted
So I became a disappointment
I met up with my internet friend yesterday.
We were both disappointed when we realised we were both middle aged men, and not 10-year-old girls.
I went for a job interview
I went for a job interview last Tuesday and was asked to describe myself in three words.
"Violent when disappointed," I replied.
I hope to get the appointment letter on Monday.
I was disappointed by the British version of Breaking Bad.
It ends after he gets cancer and all his treatment is paid for by the NHS.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The funny thing about teen pregnancy is that before it happens all you hear is "Don't do it! You'll regret it! You'll lose your freedom! Make the responsible choice!" Then after it happens, they say "We're a still disappointed, but we can still make the best of this. It's not the end of the world."
s**... auto-correct: I meant "Trump's presidency" not "teen pregnancy".
The inventor of the Big Mac died the other day....
His family ordered the most lavish coffin they could find in the brochure, but were extremely disappointed when it turned out to be nothing like the picture.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What did the disappointed s**... get for Christmas?
Clothes but no cigar...
The difference between your boyfriend and Ronda Rousey is...
Ronda actually gets paid to disappoint people for 48 seconds.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man goes to the hospital to see if he has diabetes.
Once he arrives, a nurse asks him for a u**... sample. He complies, and moments later, the nurse comes back into the room with the results.
"I'm sorry, sir, but we've found high traces of glucose in your u**.... You're diabetic." She says.
Disappointed, the man manages to reply, "Well, I'm still very thankful for your help today, nurse."
"Sure thing, sweet pee."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I'm really disappointed after hearing about Trump and the g**... thing.
I thought we had seen the end of republican trickle down economics.
Breathing heavily, she asked me what I can give her.
Me: "I'll give you a hint, it starts with a D"
Her: "Oh yess, I can't wait!"
Me: "That's right, get ready for some disappointment!"
If you sit on your hands 15 minutes before filling in an exam,
it feels like somebody else is disappointing for your teacher.
If I had a dollar...
For every time I disappointed my family, I would have enough to make them proud.
"What time does the library open?" The man on the phone asks.
"Nine AM," came the reply. "And what's the idea of calling me at home in the middle of the night to ask a question like that?"
"Not until nine AM?" The man said in a disappointed voice.
"No not till nine!" The librarian said. "Why do you want to get in before nine?"
"Who said I wanted to get in? I want to get out."
If I had a dollar every time my father said he was disappointed in me. . .
He wouldn't be disappointed
These new editions of dictionaries are frustrating
Picked up a new copy and flipped through it to find a word I knew disappeared.
The next thing I found was disappointing
The funny thing about teen pregnancy is they all say, "Don't do it! You will lose all your freedom! Make the responsible choice." But after it happens they say "We're disappointed but we can make the best of this. It's not the end of the world."
Whoops, I accidentally autocorrected "Trumps' Presidency" to "teen pregnancy"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My boyfriend looked so excited when I told him I was going to get him an e**... for his birthday!
I couldn't understand why he looked so disappointed when I handed him the keys to his new Ford
Hello and welcome to Pessimism club.
Don't expect much, and you'll still be greatly disappointed.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Once two girls asked me if I wanted a t**....
I told them that if I wanted to disappoint two people at once, I would just go home to my parents.
Husband and wife get into bed for sleeping
And the husband turns to wife and starts making out.
Wife says "don't start now, I have a gynecologist appointment tomorrow morning so I need to keep it clean".
Husband disappointed, rolls around and tries to go to sleep.
In a few minutes, he rolls back and asks "do you have a dentist's appointment tomorrow too?"
When daughter told me she prefers white rice over brown rice I was extremely disappointed.
I didn't raise her to be a rice-ist.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The hard of hearing s**......
got really disappointed when he finally arrived at his uncle's wheat farm.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I went to a space museum today but was a bit disappointed...
It was completely empty! Well, except for the black hole on display, but it s**....
I don't understand why people have threesomes
If I wanted to disappoint two people at once, I'd just get lunch with my parents
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The l**... Nextdoor
The l**... nextdoor asked me what I wanted for Christmas.
I said I wanna watch.
I was disappointed when they bought me a Rolex.
My parents got an Amazon Echo for Christmas and all they do is shout at it and get disappointed by all it can't do.
I've been replaced by Alexa and it's great.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I told my Asian parents that i am Asexual
They were disappointed that i wasn't A+s**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I met a girl in a club last night and after a few drinks, she asked if I would like to go back to her place for s**.... I didn't want to disappoint her, so...
...I said "No."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I wish the name of a business would describe what it sells...
Curry's doesn't sell curries, dominos doesn't sell dominoes, and the v**... megastore, what a disappointment.
As the teacher marked my quiz answers, she suddenly stopped, looked up at me and shook her head in utter disappointment. With cold, dead eyes, she muttered, "This is wrong." Mouth dry, I whispered, "Question 2?"
She snarled, "No, the way your hand is resting between my thighs."
He worked for years to invent an engine that ran on ambient disappointment.
But at the unveiling, it wouldn't work.
Then it did.
Briefly.
I changed the name of my printer to George R. R. Martin
It's old, works slow, has issues finishing jobs, and constantly disappoints me.
A woman goes to a fortune teller
A woman goes to a fortune teller to have her fortune read. The old fortune teller looks through her crystal ball and then gasps with horror. She says "By the next full moon your husband shall be dead!"
The woman looking disappointed says "I already know that part. Tell me if I'll get convicted or not."
The Librarian
What time does the library open? the man on the phone asked.
Annoyed, the librarian composed himself before he answered.
9 am, came the reply. And what's the idea of calling me at home in the middle of the night to ask a question like that?
Not until 9 am? the man asked in a disappointed voice.
The librarian began to get angry.
No, not until 9 am, said the librarian. Why do you want to get in before 9 am?
Who said I wanted to get in? the man sighed sadly. I want to get o
The Nigerian football team were so disappointed with Saturday's performance that they have said they will personally refund all expenses to fans who travelled to support them.
All they need to do is send bank details, sort codes & PINs, and they will transfer the money directly …
I told a chemistry joke the other day...
I thought it was good personally, but the reaction was disappointing!
I'm a proud father since 10 minutes
My son is already 20 years old but he has been a disappointment till now
In a strange way, I was really looking forward to the hurricane and I was disappointed when it was downgraded...
I thought others round these here parts would echo my sentiment, but I guess Carolinians are used to being disappointed by the Hurricanes.
I was really disappointed when I came last in the astronomy competition, but they still gave me a map of the stars just for participating.
It was a constellation prize
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Do you want to know the real reason I can't be part of a t**...?
I can only handle disappointing one person at a time.
The teacher asks, "Flora, what part of the human body increases ten times when excited?"
Flora blushes and says, "That's disgusting, I won't even answer that question." The teacher calls on Johnny: "What part of the human body increases ten times when excited?" "That's easy," says Johnny. "It's the pupil of the eye." "Very good, Johnny," responds the teacher. "That's correct." She then turns to Flora and says, "First, you didn't do your homework. Second, you have a dirty mind. And third, you're in for a BIG disappointment."
It's a great time to date a Rams fan..
They are used to disappointment and aren't expecting a ring.
This father has always been disappointed by his son...
One day he sees his son watching tv and asks him
"Son, how old are you?"
"I'm 5 Dad!" says his son, joyful
To which the father angrily replies "Me, at your age, I was 6!"
A little boy killed a butterfly.
His dad looked at him disappointed and said,
"Son, because you killed that butterfly you won't get butter for a week."
A month later he killed a honeybee, his dad looked at him and said,
"Son, because you killed that honeybee you won't get honey for a week."
The boy looks at his father and says, "I also killed a cockroach."
The dad laughs at him and said, "Nice Try!"
