Diplomat Jokes
7 diplomat jokes and hilarious diplomat puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about diplomat that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Hilarious Diplomat Jokes to Make Your Friends Roar with Laughter
What is a good diplomat joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
America just sent the Curiosity rover to Mars...
America just sent the Curiosity rover to Mars as the country watched with pride. Iran, wanting to gain a technological/global edge, decided to show up America by announcing a manned mission to the sun the very next day. The Americans, along with other western allies, decided to meet with the Iranian government to express their concern. In a conference room filled with diplomats and astrophysicists, the US delegation protested to the Iranians, Listen. Differences aside, we can't let you send people to the sun. It's s**.... They burn to death even at far distances! Please don't carry out this mission! The Iranians laughed wittily amongst themselves, jabbing each other with elbows and pointing at the westerners as one Iranian says, s**... Americans! They think we're going during the daytime!
At a Diplomats' dinner, a waiter tripped
and shattered the beautiful plate in which he was carrying a large turkey.
Hushed silence turned into a roar of laughter, when
the quick-witted Diplomat announced:
"Ladies and Gentlemen!
You have just witnessed 4 major international events happening :-
Fall of Turkey
Breakup of China
Spillage of Greece
and Frustration of Hungary!"
One of my favorite Reagan jokes:
A Soviet Diplomat goes to one of the farms in Russia, and approaches the farmer.
How are the carrots doing? Said the Diplomat.
Oh, the carrots are as big and orange as ever! Replies the farmer.
I see, and how are the beets?
Oh, sir, if Gorbachev saw these beets, he would cry with joy!
And what about the potatoes?
Sir, if we stacked the potatoes, they would be high enough to reach God!
The diplomat stares for a minute. But comrade, we don't believe in god.
Oh, good. Says the farmer. Because there are no potatoes.
Why dont ambassadors get sick?
Diplomatic immunity
A North Korean go to Poland...
Kim Jong Un goes to Poland for a diplomatic visit but his car break in the Polish countryside.
He meet a farmer that ask him :
"Kim jesteś?" (Who are you?)
And Kim reply :
"No, Kim Jong Un."
Trump goes to Israel
and while praying at the wailing wall, suffers a massive heart attack and dies. The Israeli diplomat says they can bury him in the Holy Land for 100 bucks or embalm him and ship him back for 50k. The American diplomat opts for the 50k option. The Israeli asks why take the most expensive solution? The American responds, well another man buried here rose from the dead and we cannot take that chance.
An American gets sentenced to jail in an european prison
The US government had to put in a lot of diplomatic negotiation to get him back into the states.
They mostly had to convince him.
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