The Best 47 Dilemma Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Dilemma jokes. There are some dilemma equation jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these dilemma woes puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 Funniest Dilemma Jokes and Puns
What is the greatest dilemma for a Jewish mother?
She finds out her son is gay, but is dating a doctor.
Dam's biggest dilemma...
Dammed if I do, damned if I don't.
What's a Jewish dilemma?
Free bacon.
Let the downvotes rain down on me.
Dilemma
If you had to choose between your wife or a million dollars, which car would you buy first?
A student goes up to his professor after class...
A student goes up to his professor after class and asks him to define a dilemma. The professor says "I'll do you one better and give you a perfect example. You're laying in bed naked with a gorgeous naked girl on the right of you, and a naked gay guy on your left. Who do you turn your back to?"
A dilemma
A student asked his english professor, "What is the definition of a dilemma." "The professor said, "well, there's nothing better than an example to illusrate that! "Imagine that you are laying in a bed with a beautiful naked young woman on one side and a gay man on the other." "Who are you going to turn your back on?"
Mickey's Yellow Snow Dilemma...
Mickey was angry because somebody was writing "Mickey sucks" in yellow snow outside of his front door every time it snowed. He ended up going to his friend who was a cop to ask for help. The cop checked it out and took some photos and samples. A couple of days later the cop came back to Mickey:
"Well, the good news is we've figured out that the urine came from your friend, Goofy. The bad news - it's Minnie's handwriting..."
What is a jewish man's biggest dilemma?
Free bacon
When life gives you dilemma
make dilemma-nade
A Jewish dilemma?
Free ham
Lawyers' Ethical Dilemma
When a client gives you two hundred dollar bills stuck together from the bank machine to pay a $100 bill, do you tell your law partner?
You can explore dilemma mysteries reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean dilemma difficulty dad jokes. There are also dilemma puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
A pencil sketch artists' greatest dilemma.....
2B or not 2B?
So, there's this man named Dave and he's been a really successful doctor
However, lately he's been facing a little dilemma of wanting to have sex with his patients.
One voice in his head says, "Oh come on Dave, there's probably been plenty of doctors who have done this before, it won't be any different if you do it too".
The other voice in his head says "But Dave, you're a veterinarian".
What do you call a Liberal dilemma?
Snowden hacking Hillary's files.
General Motors finally solved their workplace diversity dilemma
There are equal numbers of black, white, brown, red, yellow, and orange robots. Half the robots have penises drawn on them.
The boss of a small company has two employees, Jack and Jill…
Just recently the company has been doing badly, so the boss decides one of them must go.
Arriving at his office on Monday, the first person he sees is Jill, so he asks her to step into his office and explains his dilemma.
"Look Jill, I'm afraid I'm going to have to lay you or Jack off."
Jill replies, "You'll have to jack off then, 'cause I've got a headache."
My son asked me what a dilemma was?
"Imagine you're naked and in a big bed" I explained, "A beautiful woman on one side and a gay man on the other...
Who you going to turn your back on?"
Environmentalist Dilemma
Biggest dilemma for an environmentalist in Washroom:
'Should I save water or save paper?'
What's a dilemma for an atheist vegan?
What will they tell you about first??
What's a Jew's biggest dilemma?
Free ham
Emma's dilemma
Lady next door: What happened to your face?
Emma: My husband hit me.
Lady next door: Isn't he out of city?
Emma: I also thought so.
What's the biggest dilemma of libraries
Deciding where to put the bible, fiction or non-fiction
What is an even bigger Jewish dilemma?
Free Palestine.
A son asks his father, Dad, what's a dilemma?
Well, Son, imagine you were lying in bed, naked, and, to one side, is a beautiful, young, nude woman, and, to the other side, is a very muscular, gay man; who ya gonna turn your back on?
I am faced with a Christmas dilemma
If I tell Santa what I want for Christmas, then I'll definitely be on the naughty list.
What do you call a dilemma in Southeast Asia?
A krises.
Do you know the definition of Dilemma?
Lying in a bed naked between two people, on your left is a gay guy and on the right is a super model, which one do you turn your back to?
Hear about the mushroom who had to make a tough choice?
It was a big morrel dilemma.
Do you know a Jew's eternal dilemma?
Pork is free of charge
What is a Jew's most difficult dilemma when buying beer?
Whether or not to choose Hamm's.
A Programmer's Dilemma
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Expected '{' token
At line 32.
The owner of a dry cleaning business finds a $20 bill left in the pockets of a pair of pants that was dropped off. He now has a dilemma....
Does he tell his partner or not?
I have a dilemma. They say you should always give 100%, and I was raised to give 110%...
but... I am at the blood center.
I'm in somewhat of a moral dilemma
I've recently gotten really into the whole BDSM thing, you know, the chains, the whips, I'm the master, she's the slave..
But I'm kinda only into black chicks.
If you hasten the dalai lama...
You end up with a dilemma.
If you can't decide whether to buy real flowers or fake ones
do you have a floral dilemma?
Eventhough technology is advancing, there is still a dilemma between wired or wireless.
There are many things in which wired is better.
Example: hanging yourself.
What's a Jewish dilemma?
Half-priced ham.
What do you get when you cross a Jew and a cop?
A moral dilemma.
Burial dilemma.
Husband & wife went to Jerusalem and the Wife died there.
Priest: "Sending her body home would cost you $5,000.... but... burial here at this holy city would cost just $100".
Man:"I'll take the body home!!!"
Priest:"Why the costly option? You must really love your wife a lot"
Man: "Nothing like that Father.. Just that Jesus was buried here and came alive on the 3rd day. Why take unnecessary risk!!!
What is a Jewish dilemma?
Free ham
I was fishing when I ran out of bait. I saw a small snake nearby trying to swallow a frog and knowing the snake couldn't bite me with the frog in his mouth, I grabbed him right behind the head, took the frog and put it in my bait bucket...
Now, the dilemma was how to release the snake without getting bit, so I grabbed my bottle of Jack Daniels and poured a little whiskey in its mouth.
His eyes rolled back, he went limp.
I released him into the lake without incident and carried on fishing using the frog.
A little later, I felt a nudge on my foot.
It was that snake, with two more frogs...
An old woman visits a lawyer to draw up a will. He completes the process and charges her $100. She hands him a crisp, brand new $100 bill and as she turns to leave the lawyer notices another $100 bill stuck to it. His moral dilemma is causing him great discomfort because...
He can't decide if he should tell his partner.
Have you heard the dilemma of the constipated mathematician?
He worked it out with a pencil.
Dilemma
Police: Why did you not report the stolen card immediately?
Guy: Actually, the thief was spending less money than my wife.
Police: So, why are you reporting now?
Guy: I think, now the thief's wife has the card.
Dilemma
A male student asked his english professor what is the definition of dilemma? .
The Professor said well there's nothing better than an example to illustrate that
Imagine that you are laying in the middle of a big bed with a beautiful naked young woman on one side, and a gay man on the other, who are you going to turn your back on?
A lawyer gets paid
A client owed his lawyer $100. He handed him a crisp, new $100 bill. After the client left, the lawyer discovered that he actually received two $100 bills stuck together. This presented him with a dilemma. Should he tell his partner or not.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the dilemma problem jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working dilemma riddle piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.