Dictionary Jokes

Funniest Dictionary Short Jokes

Short dictionary jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The dictionary humour may include short language jokes also.

1. Just found the absolute worst page in the dictionary What I saw was disgraceful, disgusting, dishonest and disingenuous.
2. My ten-year-old daughter came up with this at dinner tonight: What do you get if put a copy of Macbeth on top of a dictionary? A play on words.
3. I once abused someone with a dictionary... The judge didn't know whether to charge me with verbal or physical assault
4. I bought my Dad a cheap dictionary for Christmas. He couldn't find the right words to thank me.
5. My wife has just given me a book with all the words that I'm not supposed to use when we argue.... It's called a dictionary.
6. I'll never use that dictionary again... The definition it gave for "obfuscate" was confusing and misleading.
7. I've gone from agony to ecstasy in this last week. Hopefully, by the end of this month... ...I'll be done reading this dictionary.
8. How is a thrown dictionary similar to birds flying south for winter? They're both flying information.
9. After a long day's work, I came home and saw my kid ripping off the front and back pages of my dictionary. Things just went from Bad to Worse.
10. My school did a performance last year called "The Dictionary" Turns out it was just a play on words.

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Dictionary One Liners

Which dictionary one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with dictionary? I can suggest the ones about alphabet and vocabulary.

1. I just read through six pages in a dictionary. I learned next to nothing.
2. What do you call a dictionary on drugs? High definition.
3. What do you call a dictionary thief? I don't know :(
4. My son is rehearsing for a part as a dictionary It's going to be a play on words
5. What word in the dictionary is always spelled wrong? Wrong.
6. Santa has been reading all your posts. Most of you are getting dictionaries.
7. My favourite word in the dictionary is toned Great definition
8. Last night I tried to read the dictionary in bed but didn't finish it. I got up to p
9. Why did the bodybuilder buy a dictionary? Because he wanted to get more definition.
10. what's the longest word in a black man's dictionary? sheeeeeeeeeeeeit..
11. What do they say about a rapper who stole a dictionary? He got a way with words.
12. I wrote a script about the dictionary for my local theatre It's a play on words.
13. I can't find my dictionary I'm at a loss for words
14. I got a tattoo of a dictionary on my bisep... I wanted to add definition to my arm
15. What word in the dictionary is spelled incorrectly? incorrectly

Dictionary Definition Jokes

Here is a list of funny dictionary definition jokes and even better dictionary definition puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I try working out by lifting dictionaries... I've been told that's how you get definition.
• I was certain that the definition of insanity was doing the same thing over and over but expecting a different result... but every dictionary I check says something else.
• My teacher once told me that success never comes before work... I'll definitely pay him a visit after I make a fortune selling dictionaries.
• Why was the dictionary on the top shelf more expensive than the one on the bottom... Because it was a higher definition
• What do you get a body builder for Christmas? A dictionary, so they get plenty of definition.
• There's a stack of dictionaries in my local gym. That place is full of definition.
• How can you tell if a dictionary has been working out? You can see the definition.
• I looked up the definition of missing in the dictionary… It wasn't there.
• What does the dictionary like when judging bodybuilders? Definition.
• Did you know that a new verb has been added into the Oxford Dictionary? The definition is: To prank somebody in a infantile way. Nah I'm just kidding

English Dictionary Jokes

Here is a list of funny english dictionary jokes and even better english dictionary puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Now that there is a musical about Alexander Hamilton, I'm going to make a Musical about the founding of the Webster's English Dictionary It's going to be a play on words
• No means no. -page 47 of my Spanish to English dictionary
• How do Spider-Men get good in English? They consult the Webster dictionary.
• Only one word in the English Language starts with D and ends in Y If you don't believe my check the dictionary
• Someone just told me... The word gullible has been taken out of the English dictionary!
• What word in the English dictionary, which word, unless spelled incorrectly is always spelled incorrectly Incorectly.
  >*(Source: Cortana)*
• Fellow female classmate asks if she could borrow my dictionary in English class I pull down my pants

A Womans Dictionary Jokes

Here is a list of funny a womans dictionary jokes and even better a womans dictionary puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• she asked me to show her what it meant to be a woman So I pulled out a dictionary and opened it to W

Dictionary Defines Jokes

Here is a list of funny dictionary defines jokes and even better dictionary defines puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Website Idea They should make a website that defines words with pictures instead of words. It's like a dictionary of pictures. They'll call it dicpic .com
• What word is defined exactly halfway through a dictionary "middle"
• I believe as a society, it is our dictionaries that define us.

Urban Dictionary Jokes

Here is a list of funny urban dictionary jokes and even better urban dictionary puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• If there is an Urban Dictionary... ...Shouldn't there be a Rural Dictionary
  Credits to my friend Portia.
• FBI responds to increased number of botched investigations resulting in civilian casualties By adding a new definition for "botched" to urban dictionary; successful
• Ambrose Bierce was the first.... Urban dictionary
• Webster Dictionary... Webster dictionary on the streets, Urban dictionary under the sheets.
• urban dictionary you cease to amaze me

Cheerful Fun Dictionary Jokes for Lovely Laughter

What funny jokes about dictionary you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean grammar jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make dictionary pranks.