Dickens Jokes
39 dickens jokes and hilarious dickens puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about dickens that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Check out these funny Dickens jokes – perfect for any fan of the 19th century British fiction! If you know your novels and publisher, you're sure to laugh at these humorous cider references. Laugh out loud with these Dickens-inspired jokes.
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Funniest Dickens Short Jokes
Short dickens jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The dickens humour may include short hick jokes also.
- Charles Dickens walks into a bar... and orders a martini. The bartender asks,"Olive or twist?"
- Dickens " A tale of two cities " was originally published in two local newspapers. It was the Bicester times, it was the Worcester times...
- TIL that Charles Dickens first published A Tale of Two Cities in two English local newspapers: .
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It was the Bicester Times. It was the Worcester Times. - If Charles Dickens wrote The Lord of the Rings, how would the novel have started? It was the best of Shires. It was the Worcestershires.
- Literary Humor. I ordered a martini with an olive and a twist of lime.
The bartender served it with no olive or twist.
I gave him the Dickens. - I was reading the book "Great Expectations" by Charles Dickens. It wasn't as good as I hoped it would be.
- Q. Why didn't Charles Dickens enjoy his cherry popsicle? A. Because he had grape expectations.
- The estate of Charles Dickens is too make alcoholic beverages from the apples on their land The slogan is "All the girls love a Dickens Cider"
- Last night I was reading "A Christmas Carol" to my kids when I dropped the book on my foot. It hurt like the Dickens!
- "You're an idiot!", yelled my wife as she stormed away. And to think, after I just spent 3 hours driving to liquor stores looking for this "Big Dickens' Cider" she said she wanted so badly.
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Dickens One Liners
Which dickens one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with dickens? I can suggest the ones about thickens and chick.
- What did the bartender say when Charles Dickens ordered a martini? Olive or twist?
- Why was Charles Dickens disappointed by his cherry Popsicle? He had grape expectations
- "Hello. I'd like a book by Dickens, please."
"Which one?"
"Charles." - Dicken's Brand Cider My wife just can't go to sleep without a warm Dicken's Cider.
- I don't have Great Expectations for my son. But I got him the other 13 Dicken's Books.
- I've read all of Charles Dickens's novels except one. I don't have *Great Expectations*.
- What brand of cider gets you pregnant? Dickens.
- My favorite brand of cider is Dicken's. My wife also loves Dicken's cider. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
- In honor of Charles Dickens... I am also going to be poor this Christmas
- My favorite english writer is Dickens JK Rowling
- What brand of sneakers are Charles Dickens's favorite? Skechers by Boz!
- If You Were Arguing Evolution With A Pederast Priest, Would You Take Dickens' Side?
- Have you tried the new cider? Made by Dicken's.
- Charles Dickens' book on wine making, Grape Expectations.
- What's Charles Dickens's middle name? Deep
Charles Dickens Jokes
Here is a list of funny charles dickens jokes and even better charles dickens puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Charles Dickens had lots of melodious metal bars outside the front of his house. Some of them were expensive, others dirt cheap.
It was the best of chimes, it was the worst of chimes. - What does Charles Dickens keep in his spice rack? The best of thymes, the worst of thymes.
- Which one's the gay jury member in the case between Charles Dickens and Leo Tolstoy? The one that takes Dickens' side.
- Have you heard the slogan for Charles Dickens Brand Hard Cider? There is nothing quite like a hard Dickens' Cider!
- TIL that the novel "A Tale of two cities " by Charles Dickens was first serialised in two black country papers.... The Bister Times and the Worcester Times
- What was Charles Dickens' favourite experimental pop album? It was the best of Grimes...
Dickens Cider Jokes
Here is a list of funny dickens cider jokes and even better dickens cider puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- A range of alcoholic drinks is being produced named after famous authors .... Dickens Cider is proving very popular
- Which company makes the best apple cider? Dicken's. Because everyone wants their Dicken's Cider.
Hilarious Fun Dickens Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about dickens you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean scrooge jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make dickens pranks.
An old lady goes to the doctor and says, "I have this problem with frequent gas.
Fortunately, the farts never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've f**... at least 10 times since I've been here, and I bet you didn't even notice!" The doctor says, "I see. Take these pills and come back next week." The next week the old lady returns. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the h**... you gave me, but now my silent farts stink like the dickens." The doctor says, "Good! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's work on your hearing."
Charles Dickens had writer's block…
He had a contract due for a new novel, but he hadn't even thought of a title yet. He went into the local pub and asked the barman for a Martini.
"Olive, or twist?"
Dickens: I wrote a book about ghosts
**Publisher:** we need a christmas book
**Dickens:** *[adding, like, 4 words]* I wrote a book about christmas ghosts
Charles Dickens was at his publisher's office.
CD: "I'm going to be honest with you, Howard. It's almost complete and I have most of the elements of the story figured out. Great characters, a terrific setting, some good conflict and a theme. But something's missing, and I can't figure out what it is"
Howard: "The plot, Dickens?"
